Internet dorks

Internet dorks usually wear jeans. And jeans only. Most likely the same jeans almost every day.

In the late 1980's, the Internet was made more accessible to the general public. This meant that scientists and other intelligent people could put up their website and other people around the world and possibly in other worlds could view this intelligent information.

For a while, this is how it worked, until the Internet dorks came and destroyed it with the introduction of pornography. This had severely weakened the intelligence of the Internet, but the intelligent people still managed to keep a hold on the Internet.

For a few years, the Internet dorks were a minority on the Internet. Whenever they spoke up, the intelligent people would quickly use their cracking powers to shut up the Internet dorks. Nothing made by humans could come without conflict. The intelligent people knew this. They accepted the fact that they would have to keep the Internet dorks tucked under a rug.

Then the Internet dorks rebelled. In a display of utter defiance, the Internet dorks posted the dreaded All Your Base video.

The intelligent people fought hard to keep down the rise of Internet dorks. For a while there was an epic struggle in which both sides were in a stalemate. Then the Internet dorks did something dreadful. They started speaking in 1337.

Without knowing what the Internet dorks would do, the intelligent people didn't stand a chance. They were quickly wiped out. The dorks were arrested and Blocked off the internet for trolling and Uploading Garbagey Content and vandalisim.

There still remains a few lingering around some forums, but there are far too many Internet dorks lurking around the Internet for the intelligent people to do anything about them. Whenever an intelligent person makes himself known on the Internet, he is quickly swarmed with messages typed in the bizarre language known as 1337. He is then converted and becomes an Internet dork.

The Internet is now a barren wasteland of filth and slime because of these Internet dorks.

Defence against Internet dorks

You may be an intelligent person yourself and may want to know about how to defend yourself against Internet dorks. The best way to defend yourself is by avoiding their main breeding grounds.

Stay away from SPAM forums. If you enter there, you will come out an Internet dork.

Also: try to stay in a forum where there the admin is an intelligent person. That way, he will use the divine banning powers to smite any evil that comes in his forum.

Most of all: Don't try and deal with the Internet dorks if you do not have divine mod powers. This will only turn you into one of them. Only the all-powerful moderators have the power to smite the Internet dorks. Send all Dork sightings to Me, at SuperMod. Hey dorks!!! Ba626(gysqggdwu71(2:6(

“Hey, they're not that bad! Moderators are bad!”

~ Oscar Wilde on Internet Dorks

Conclusion

Please have a safe Internet experience. And remember: If you're an Internet dork: 0MGW7FBBQ!1!! STFU n00b!!!1!

Thank you.

See also

• King of the Internet
• The Presidential Battle Royale of 1975.
• Xaositects