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The M822 Hand Grenade is an explosive device that resembles a hand. On activation, the device lunges towards the nearest throat or throat-like object and latches on tight with its five "fingers" exploding violently in a gruesome mess. Special care must be taken when activating the grenade. When activated, one should run behind the nearest wall or bush and squat down, so that the grenade cannot "see" you.
Photo credit: Mosquitopsu
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The Lockheed Martin Nuclear Attack Force and Creators of All Things Aerial and Destructive Corporation, often shortened to read Lockheed Martin Corporation, sometimes Lunkhead Moron Corporation, or even just Lockheed Martin, is an American offense defense company with the singular goal of designing weapons that can more easily turn a person into a fine red mist for the low cost of $5,000,000 per shot. Lockheed Martin is considered the holy grail of job opportunities for anyone interested in engineering, math, ethics, or just the opportunity to obliterate things. They are most well known for their consumer products including the F-22 Raper, the Orion-class spaceships, the C-130 Hunkules, and most notably "Project Pat" missiles. (Full article...)
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- ... that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ... that the police are at your door?
- ... that Ann Coulter is a highly successful parody of right-wing political rhetoric?
- ... that 100% of people who are rushed to the hospital will die?
- ... that the White House is really off-white?
- ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra?
- ... that Hitler killed himself out of fear of Soviet capture and torture, not because he saw the gas bill?
- ... that I think you know what's happening today?
- ... that those suspicious white spots on your professor's blazer are in fact mayonnaise?
- ... tennis isn't just a game?
- ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand?
- ... that the admins will never approve your DYK submission nor will they read these suggestions?
- ... that the amazing sensation of excruciatingly warm liquid on the genitals is just one of many reasons to pour boiling hot water down your trousers?
- ... that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth?
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Chuck Norris didn't die, Death got Chuck Norris'd.
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| On this day...
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April 6: Arson Wednesday (New Zealand)
- 612 - Arab popstar Mohammed declares he is "more popular than Jesus now."
- 1522 - Mary had a little lamb. Yankee Doodle claims to be father.
- 1593 - John Greenwood, English Congregationalist, hanged. His last words: "Get this fucking rope off of me!"
- 1935 - AT&T formed. Its first disgruntled customer is created moments later.
- 1955 - Hell freezes over, Devil forced to skate to work.
- 1974 - ABBA wins Eurovision, marking the beginning of the Mamma Mia Invasion.
- 1985 - Video games are first cited as a precursor to juvenile delinquency.
- 1994 - Kurt Cobain's attempt to win a posthumous Grammy backfires tragically.
- 1999 - Chinese Democracy is released and subsequently pulled off shelves after the U.S. Government denies reports of its existence.
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