User:Mhaille/Funk

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit. Sophia has inspired us to work on 40,978 articles since opening in January 2005. Before editing, please read the Beginner's Guide and browse the Big Five. Politics | Games | Computers | People | Quaint | Coherent Most Popular | Alphabetical Index | Other Categories... When an object is "placed into orbit", the deepest foundations of our commonsense view of the world unravel, and the inexorable power of compound interest takes hold. Vote for featured images » Today's featured article Download article feed plugin for Google Desktop Reformed Orthodox Rabbi William "Bill" Clinton (born August 19, 1946) is an American politician, former childcare worker, former amateur saxophonist, and swingin' bachelor. As the 42nd President of the United States, and the horniest man to hold that position since JFK, he led America through the economic golden age of the '90s. Clinton is famous for being the first president to institute the Opposite Presidential Term, in which everything he said during his second term is the exact opposite of what he said in his first term. In his first term, he was a Liberal, but in his second term, he was a Neocon; that was his way of bringing about change. Clinton's term in office was marred by economic and political reform. The most serious was some bitch named Hillary, who kept insisting she was his wife and had actually slept with him. This was widely ignored by everyone until it was revealed that Bill had been secretly cheating on the First Lady with Hillary, in a perverse affair that culminated in a media frenzy. (Full article...) Recently featured: Bill Clinton Buffalo Bills UnGames:Garlic bread Orchid Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia edit Selected anniversaries April 4: National No Spamming Day (Iraq) 3141 BC - The world's first great pi was baked. It took $\pi$ years to eat. 1949 - Iceland's blundered declaration of war on the USA leads to the accidental formation of NATO. 1503 - Disneyland Central America opens in the Aztec city of Tenochtitlan. 1975 - You really should have bought shares in Microsoft, which was formed on this day. 1984 - President Ronald Reagan calls for an international ban on something or other, oh hell I can't remember. (Pictured) 2001 - The butterfly effect is proved in an ingenious experiment, causing devastating hurricane damage in China. 2002 - Actor Mickey Rooney begins his process of decomposition. Archived Anniversaries Today's word of the day is frivolous Try to use it in your conversations. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Chuck Norris didn't die, Death got Chuck Norris'd. Trump talks to America on Iran, Chuck Norris, the Moon, March Madness, and firing Pam Bondi World shocked as Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the bucket (Pictured) Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize Iran kept barely alive by Cardboard Ayatollah Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein Files • War Special Combat Operation in Iran • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed • March Madness Final Four Recent deaths: Robert Mueller • Transgender self-identity in India • Mr. Strickland • C.B. Buckner's carreer as an MLB ump • Duke's basketball season • Jesus Upcoming deaths: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons • Streetsigns with Cesar Chavez's name • Sora • Tiger Woods' driver's license and career.. fuck it, his life can go too • Holostars JP More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons: ... that AMC's hit series Breaking Bad Wind (Pictured) featured the actors' real farts? ... that every time you fall asleep, you die? ... that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth? ... that I Kissed a Girl and I Liked It was written by a computer? ... that water is bad for your health because fish have sex in it? ... that I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the frickin' frogs gay? ... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love? ... that there are at least three other businesses like show business? Read More edit Recent articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners Uncyclopedia's sista projects Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia. 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