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Today's featured article
Ahhh. Long day of work over. Time to grab that big-ass bowl of vegetable beef barley soup in the fridge.
Bill, you better not have touched my soup again! Like that time you got so drunk you took a whiz in it. Twice. Come to think of it, it was shitty soup. That probably improved it. Not like this one.
Let's see, cake, milk, horse semen, ketchup, monkey, hair roller thingy, soup! Yes! My life is whole again!
Hold on...
Why is my hair roller in here?
Wait...
This horse semen tastes funny. Did you put your semen in here again, Bill?
Don't ask how I know what yours tastes like. We were drunk. Not my fault.
Just a minute...
WHY IS THERE A MONKEY IN MY FUCKING FRIDGE?!? (Full article...)
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In the news
"Come! Come support my tacky AI website!"
Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Files • Winter Olympics • r/TheDarnold still having a massive field day • NFL fans experiencing withdrawal symptoms with the season now over
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Did you know...
From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons:
- ... that the man on the left is late for an important meeting with an international Terrorist and the man on the right is indignant at the increased cost of accessing Internet porn? (Pictured)
- ... that Ann Coulter is a highly successful parody of right-wing political rhetoric?
- ... there's a ninja behind you but it left when you turned around?
- ... that the Rorschach inkblots all look kinda like my Aunt Gladys giving head to Satan?
- ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane?
- ... that the admins will never approve your DYK submission nor will they read these suggestions?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
- ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else?
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