User talk:ChiefjusticeDS/Archive 1

ExOps

Well, I've changed ExOps up a little, so you could Piss upon it in the ExOps discussion page.

Wow. Thanks

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Pretty excelent pee, esspecially for only your only fourth. Thanks very much. I will look into finding some better images, Sonje'll probably be able to fix the first one up so it's a little better. As for the rest I kinda fell into them telling some back story but I guess it didn't work much, I did however want to avoid using lots of zombie pictures because getting ones that actually fitted properly would be difficut if not impossible. And it being an UnBook the main text should really come first.

You point on Charley though, is definitly something I should fix up becuase I suspect he was a bit weaker. and I kind a forgot he was on drugs after a while. so yeah I probably won't to radical stuff with him but maybe add a bit and take a bit.

And your point on my concept was dead on (that might be a pun, heehee), I stole it from Shean of the Dead. I just hoped to actually be a bit funnier than it was, certainly in a different style.

Also also also, good to meet you! :D    Orian57    Talk   21:09 5 July 2009

Brilliant~! Teacher says you get a gold star on forehead

Teacher also said to give you this:

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Probably the clearest pee i have ever revieved with very little antioxidants, thank you very much, you do a brilliant job of reviewing and this gives me some more awesome guidelines. Kudos You deserve a beer too:

Acrolo has bought you a beer because you look thirsty!! Kudos! Drink up, you are gonna need the piss .

Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 08:16, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Thank you

For the review on Astronaut. I had no idea it was really that good! I'll add a couple pics and change some things around. Also, I am quite jealous of you. You've done like ten reviews and already have two golden shower awards and I have none. You really are good at this. Staircase CUN^t 16:39, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Thanks

For the Pees on both my articles. I have but one question, though: did you listen to the audios that were on the UnScript? Most of the humor is dependent on the accompanying audios--indeed, those were made prior to the actual article, so I can't actually change anything in the way of the text, lest I risk it not matching the audios. Anyway, thank you for not one, but two good, timely reviews. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:57, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

Review time

Hey. [Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/HowTo:Interrupt Serious News Broadcasts Here's yours back] and tomorrow we can all use it to wrap our fish and chips... (Don't panic - it's not bad.) Pup 01:48, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

This review was brought to you by PuppyOnTheRadio. If you appreciated this review, then please don't hesitate to vote for him as n00b of the Month, or vote for his article as VFH. If you don't like this review, then please ignore this message.

Once again! Thank you!

You have my vote for reviewer of the month... I will make the necessary edits in the meantime :)

Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 09:46, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

Per Above

Thanks for eth review on my UnScript. It was actually on VFH when you did it and so I missed it yesterday (I'd taken teh page off my watchlist). Still thanks, and enjoy your holisay! :)    Orian57    Talk   11:58 7 July 2009

Thank you :)

Thanks for the guidlines, I was trying a different style of dark blatant humor XD, and its great to know where I am to improve... I'll be working on it for a second review Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 13:54, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

Will Smith

Thanks for the review. I just went through it and made a couple of minor additions/alterations. Could you give it a quick once-over for me, and let me know if what I've done's been an improvement, so I don't have to wait for another Pee Review? Thanks. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:34, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

Number Bases

Given that there are predominantly only two people working the PEE review queue at the moment, can I as that you do a fairly intense review on "Number Bases." I'm not so fussed about the scoring - I have no intention of FA for it as it stands - but I need to have a fresh injection of perspective to tighten it up somewhat. Pup t 21:31, 23/07/2009

Croshaw

Thanks for yet another stellar review. Mr. Spellcheck said the only mistakes I had made was when I wrote video game as one word on a couple occasions, which I have rectified. I'll make other edits/changes later today at some point, and then let you know when I've done so, so you can give the cleaned-up article a quick once-over and let me know what you think. Thanks again. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:53, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

Well, I mulled over your suggestions. I gave new/improved captions a great deal of thought at work today, and I honestly say nothing that struck me as an absolute improvement came, so I just left what was there. In regards to people being unfamiliar with subject matter, I left two external links to Mr. Croshaw's website and ZP reviews (he'll appreciate the free publicity, plus he always sort of "whores" his own stuff in a self-aware sort of way anyway, so yeah). Finally, I made a redirect page from Zero Punctuation, so yeah. I'm now going to nominate the article for VFH, see how it fairs, and the act/react accordingly. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:53, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Hey

Hey ChiefJustice, thanks for the feedback vote on that crossword VFH, you're right, I was just pleasantly surprised at the time to find that the page was even remotely well written after coming across it on a whim. Anyway, you're from Leeds (I assume, given your input on its page)? Cool, whereabouts? I'm from Harrogate, just north of Leeds. --El Sid 18:04, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

To be honest CJ, I don't know Leeds well enough to contribute effectively, I've spent the last 4 years in Aberdeen and very rarely travel anywhere at the moment, not even Leeds, sorry. I'd be willing to proof-read and maybe help come up with some refinements and all, but I don't think I could contribute originally at all. Been to Alwoodley though, I think, and I've definitely been to the Ikea a few times, I don't think this is helpful though eh? :( --El Sid 21:21, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

Leeds? You poor, poor man. Anyhoo, glad to see some fellow northerners on the site. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Yeah, Leeds. Why do I live here again? To be honest Sid as long as you know that Andy's mum is in fact not a fish (I shit you not) and that Leeds is on planet earth (Though if you have ever been to Morley you might reconsider, ha ha) you are already over qualified to edit the bloody thing. Since most people don't seem to know when they edit it. Oh and whereabouts in Aberdeen?? I came from there originally. --ChiefjusticeDS 20:09, 26 July 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: July 23rd, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The edition that's black and white and dead all over

July 23rd, 2009 • Issue 57 • The Newspaper That Won't Tell Everyone That You Wet the Bed! Oops...

Uncyclopedia Users Form Fantasy Football League By Gerrycheevers This week, several Uncyclopedians banded together under the leadership of one Guildensternenstein to form some sort of "Fantasy Football" organization. What exactly this entails is unclear, but it appears that the football- and soccer-related fantasies of the participating members will be carried out in the semi-private confines of the forums. Reactions were mixed to this development, with some users expressing emotions ranging from apathy to indifference. Others voiced concern about children, decency, and lewd public conduct. "My little boy came home today saying something about going to another boy's house to perform football fantasies!" said one outraged and confused mother. Regardless of the small amount of negative feedback, participants are eager to begin fantasizing about their favorite football players, such as David Beckham. Bradaphraser had this to say: "The Fantasy Football League is a chance for Uncyclopedians to get away from the hustle and bustle of everyday Uncyclopedia work and actually have some fun for a change. While I usually am busy with the administrating task of sitting on my lazy ass and doing nothing, this gives users a chance to see me in a more relaxed state." "I fully expect that this venture will be just as successful as my recent run for the Presidency," continued Brad, "which I lost to Bradford Lyttle of the Pacifist party by a mere 110 votes. I fully expect to win one or possibly even two games in this upcoming season, assuming of course that a draft is eventually held." Said draft is scheduled to begin immediately, and assuming only a small portion of footballers flee to Canada to evade this draft, the Uncyclopedia Fantasy Football League will be ready to hold its first game by opening day. Village Dump Suffers From Rash of Inactivity By Gerrycheevers In a startling development, activity on Uncyclopedia's main gathering place, the Village Dump, has all but ceased. With The UnIdiot registering the sole comment in the last three full days, the normal flow of important, relevant conversation in the Forums appears to have dried up. While an excess of users can usually be found loitering aimlessly in the halls of the Dump, it appeared all but deserted as of press time. Several theories have been raised, ranging from the intriguingly possible (July weather causes Uncyclopedians to go outside) to the exceedingly headache-inducing (Uncyclopedians are being abducted by giant space cabbages). However, one of the more interesting theories comes from our lead scientist and nature correspondant, DogNewspaper (unavailable for picture). He claims that while the Village Dump itself along with associated forums such as the Ministry of Love and the Help forum has seen a decline in activity, the so-called Benson's House of Pancakes has seen a shocking upswing in activity. In the same time frame that only a single edit was made in the Village Dump, sixteen different topics were edited in Benson's Breakfast Domicile. DogNewspaper, that earlier mentioned nature correspondant, calls this a migration. "Woof," he claimed, elaborating that many users were unable to adapt to conditions found in the normal Village Dump, and were forced to relocate to the more hospitable Benson-related location. It is here, in the BHOP, that users are free to create topics concerning their own birthdays, the anniversaries of their birth, and memorials commemorating the day they were born. Whether the mass exodus is complete or not has yet to be seen.

Check out these pages! US vs UK, the showdown... almost Picture Wars: Forum Edition Still counting to a million From our logs: 03:45, 23 July 2009 Under user blocked Mi$ter Bigg (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (insert Cosby catchphrase here. or not - I don't really give two fucks) 00:48, 20 July 2009 TheLedBalloon blocked 71.195.100.104 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (In the words of Abraham Lincoln, suck my presidential cock, bitch!) 06:30, 18 July 2009 Mordillo blocked Speroxenos (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (your hard on does not impress me) Biopic of the Week Arguably the most prominent sub-primate whose existance status varies depending on the day of the week on the entire wiki, An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays has recently made a return to Uncyclopedia. His track record speaks for itself: awesome articles abound in Ape's presence, his handling of breaking news situations is praiseworthy, and his information guides are useful and informative. Welcome back, Ape! Old School Featured Article of the Week Toilet Door Communication, or TDC, is considered by many to be the forerunner of the modern internet. This fascinating form of conversation is complete with its own exceedingly dense jargon and wide spectrum of users. Washing your hands after use is strongly recommended. Quote of the Week <Bonner> A while later we also completely wrapped the scooter in cling film <Bonner> I still have the photos, he was really pissed about that one <e|m|c> You mean saran wrap. <e|m|c> Fucking English. <Bonner> Cling flim <e|m|c> Uhh. Saran wrap. <Bonner> cling film <Bonner> :) <e|m|c> Cling film <Bonner> Saran wrap <e|m|c> Correct. This Week in Uncyc, 1901 Uncyclopedia users celebrated their first of many week-long tributes to Oscar Wilde, unable to wait the originally planned year after his death. The entire main page was dedicated to Wilde-related issues, and the first instance of mass Wilde quoting ensued. Reader Poll of the Week The editors need your help; please weigh in here on the important, non-boring issue of UnSignpost formatting.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

This edition is on time, and anyone who tells you differently is lying! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 18:51, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

Review blah blah blah

Hi boss. First and foremost -

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

I appreciate the feedback. There has been a little comment on my talk page in that regard as well, following off the back of your discussion. Secondly I created User:POTR/Template:PEEd the other day, which comes out a little something like this.

	The article UnNews:McDonalds Should Be Boycotted has been reviewed by ChiefjusticeDS(talk)
	Version as at 24 July 2009	PEE review

It makes it easier for me to place it in my own pile of reviews done as well as dropping it onto the pages of the reviewees. I though you might appreciate it. Pup t 23:22, 24/07/2009

• I'll be stealing that template now mkay and there is nothing you can do about it muhaha!! (Kittenhuffing infidel!) Jihad Jihad! Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 09:30, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

“You cannot, sir, take from me anything that I will more willingly part withal, --except my wife, except my wife, except my wife.”

— POTR with a little bitty help from Hamlet

Thanks

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my recently featured article.

Your support is greatly appreciated.

—Guildy

---

{{Oh Dear}}

Making your life easier for the sake of progress.™ Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 20:05, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

One of these days I'll stop jumping to conclusions sorry for spamming your talk page like that man. --ChiefjusticeDS 20:26, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Amg thanks

Thanks once again Chief. And the nom nom apples too! I know I have given you a golden shower already, but I just have to make this bottom of your page all shiny again. Wait... Here it comes... Wait for it....

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 07:04, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

Thankies

For reviewing.

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

'cos I forgot my old template. But anyway, thanks. It seemed funny to me since I kind of understood the dialect slang. But thanks still. zh I hate me new sig 09:46 July 28

I thought you probably would understand. I thought as I was reviewing that I was being a bit harsh on it, especially as I figured it out too after a while. My only concern was that people wouldn't stick around to figure it out and they would miss the point, especially if you went on VFH. Anyway thanks for the award, it's always appreciated. --ChiefjusticeDS 13:09, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

My pleasure. zh I hate me new sig 08:30 July 30

Let's go for a hat trick

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Thanks for the great review. I'm glad to see that somebody around here besides me doesn't just average the scores in the Misc. section. One question, though; where did the tone lose consistency? That's something I always try to avoid like the plague in my articles. Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 16:39, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

I really was nit picking, it was just where the character appeared to realise his own inadequacies, with the "(and possibly trying to wipe the spit from her face)" It isn't much granted but I was reading along really enjoying the character's ignorance of all things, this just felt like him realising all was possibly not well. It really isn't anything to worry about. Apologies for not showing it in the review. The award is much appreciated. --ChiefjusticeDS 17:56, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

Oh, OK. That was one of a couple parts that an IP (which I suspect to be a user in disguise) added. Perhaps I can figure out some way to reword it, because I really liked the IP's contributions. Anyway, thanks for clarifying, and thanks again for the splendorful review. Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 18:01, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

The Doctor

Does it look any better now? I know, it's up for proofread. But layout-wise? Also, any pointers on toning down idiotic nonsense? I have fixed the funny tenses, and I've tried to walk every incarnation through HTBFANJS, but I'm lost. MacMania 01:34, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for the review

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Thanks there, your review of back to basics was very helpful, and I'll be going through some of the improvements suggested:-)--Sycamore (Talk) 08:27, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Fable Review Constructive Critisisum

Alright, dude, you seem have me over a barrel as far as comedic ability is concerned I can see that, but you my freind need to learn a thing or two about constructive critisism.

I have no problem whatsoever with you saying that my article sucks, but there is no reason for you to make personal insults about things that you made up about me.

Example: "You need to apply yourself and actually do some work rather than making up nonsense"

I wrote a long article, that is work. Implying that I haven't done work is simply not true, and it's just an incredibly lame way of making me look like a bum. The whole thing is full of cheap shots like these and you haven't made any acknowledgment whatsoever of places where I have already done as you have suggested.

"The hero's guild is an academy that trains people to kill. The guild has a policy of letting the students use the skills they are given for good or bad and they even let the good and bad students kill each other on the outside. Despite all the incredible money and effort that goes into this, no one seems to have realized that this the same as not having a guild in the first place"

This is a none sexual joke that parodies a real aspect of the game. It could be better. One of the things involved in giving people inpute is showing them were they have gone down the right track and help them traverse that road even further. But you just had it in your head that you were going to flame me and make me look as bad as possible when I went out of my way to seek advice.

There are also places were I have parodied real aspects of the game and turned them into a sexual joke. Maby not the best thing to do but you could say "That's good, it's a real part of the game, but you need to put it differently because there are way to many sexual references in this article"

When someone asks for help, no matter how much they suck, the decent thing to do is is give an honest opinion (about their work, not what you think of them personally), a nudge in the right direction and a pat on the back for having the guts to try.

P.S. Do not take a look at my user page, you won't like it.

“Good work hero. You firmly put your point across without insulting him.”

~ Your mentor on this user

Woops, forgot to sign. --El Cheeso 11:32, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

The thing about reviews is that they are opinions, and everyone's does therefore differ. That said, Chief, I think much of what you said about the article was valid, but you were pretty harsh in the way you expressed it. Even if I'm reviewing an article I don't think is good, I try to be more encouraging - you did give some good advice, but it was in quite a dispiriting way, as is evidenced by the above comments. A review of an article that needs work is a difficult thing to get right, but try to keep your comments on the encouraging side (I used to point out that some of our best authors started out writing stuff that would get a similar score - Cajek and Led being good examples). You're doing a great job overall, so please don't see this as a major rebuke or anything, just a pointer from someone who's been there before. --UU - natter 11:43, Jul 30

Thanks for making some suggestions about the reviews. I apologise if you felt any of my comments were made in error, UU makes a valid point when he says the review is my own opinion. Not wishing to start a flame war or anything, but, I have always tried to be constructive in my reviews and I see it as a big issue that you have clearly been offended and angered by my comments. You must understand that when I review an article I get very involved with it and I take it pretty seriously, it does actually annoy me when I see that someone has been lazy with an article that has a great deal of potential.

I know that writing an article is hard work having written a few myself, but I must assure you that my only wish was to help you improve the article, I apologise if this intent was disguised by some poorly chosen words. As for not pointing out what you did well, I have to point out that while you did do some things very well, the article was in need of work and, as far as I knew, had a writer who didn't want to do it, thusly they needed to be told to get it right, I apologise for making this assumption in your case, but I can only work with what is put in front of me.

My general opinion with sexual humour in Fable is that, the sex was a part of the game that is emphasised too much. Perhaps I am becoming jaded by reverting articles written by 10 year olds and I accept I made one assumption too many when I looked at your article. I also did what I did for every article author before reviewing, I looked at your user page and your talk so I can identify what your usual standard is. All I saw was a question on an edit to an article, I couldn't help but think this edit was not out of character.

My biggest issue is that I always intend to be available to help writers in need, regardless of how good or bad their first attempt was and I am always going to be on hand for a writer who is serious about improving an article, and I was hoping that you would contact me so I could help further if you needed me. I once again apologise and hope that you have not been alienated from the idea of getting help from me or PEE review, please let me know if you have any questions or qualms with regard to this response. --ChiefjusticeDS 17:27, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Proofread

Hi ChiefjusticeDS,

If you have some time to kill, could you proofread my article, right here? Gracias Hombre --Monsieur William Little 13:01, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

I've got a couple of reviews to do right now, but sure, I'll try to pick it up in the next few days. Good to meet you --ChiefjusticeDS 17:53, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Ok I have proofread most of it, the only parts I haven't done are the parts that appeared to be under construction.--ChiefjusticeDS 21:10, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Thomas Isaac the Tank Engine

Fantastic review. I gave you a golden shower not long ago, so forgive me if I don't give you another one again now. I've gone through it another time and made a few changes to it, predominantly around the Plot synopsis. I've done a swift proofread, but if I've made any more errors (assuming it's not riddled with the) then feel free to correct them. Main thing I'd like to know is with the changes to the feel of the synopsis and the changes to layout/length of the piece in total, what would you suggest going forward? (And I know how many requests like this you get. I'm working on about five things at once, so there's no need to rush it, but there's also no need for an intense review.) Pup t 01:46, 31/07/2009

Yeah you know the drill

Ta for the review. Might leave it for a rainy day before actually working on it, it was more just so I could get writing again, had a minor bout of writers block, but I've got a couple of ideas now which I'll probably fiinsh. Anyway, thank you, all of what you said there was valid and is precicely why I'm no good at UnNewses.    Orian57    Talk   15:30 1 August 2009

And because it's still on the subgect of thankings I won't create another header (my template was different though, it needs its own space): thanks for all your spelling corrections on my articles, I geuss you've been reading though my bibliography? enjoying it?    Orian57    Talk   10:42 2 August 2009

Yeah I have been, I really like a lot of your work and I tend to correct typos when I see them everywhere. So, yeah keep it up, good luck improving the UnNews by the way, I think you could make that one go the distance too. --ChiefjusticeDS 16:45, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

A shiny template for you!

Golden Urinal

You have been awarded this coveted Golden Urinal in recognition of having completed over 25 in-depth pee reviews. Thanks for the hard work.
Now have a rehydrating drink, and get back to pissing – there are still articles out there that need your help, dammit!

---

You've deserved this for a while, but I've been working too hard to do checking stuff, so apologies for the delay! --UU - natter 17:58, Aug 1

Thanks!

Orian57 would like to thank you! For voting him Playwright of the Month! He appreciates it and is also uncertain about why he is speaking in third person - he hates that. Seriously though, thanks, I'll almost certainly do more in the future.

   Orian57    Talk   22:10 1 August 2009

Thx

Thx. The formatting is very confusing for me. The first time I tried to post a picture I ended up hacking into the Pentagon. Thx for the pardon =) projectjulio 19:09, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: July 30th, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper That DOESN'T Think It's Better Than You!

July 30th, 2009• Issue 58• Now Delivered Trendily Late!

Uncyclopedia Users Alter Time Itself By The Woodburninator This week: an update. As previously reported in an earlier news story, one month ago several well-known contributors went on a campaign to try and delete time itself. It is said they were trying to bring about an end to unfunniness throughout history, with the slight side effect of non-existence. But just as it looked as if their plan would come to fruition, cooler heads prevailed and stopped everything in its tracks. Since then, the plan has changed. Instead of deleting all that ever was, the users have decided it would be much more prudent to just change all of history to their liking. Several users have been seen spending their free time on User:Gwax/Timeline rebuild, in some cases changing events one year at a time, and in others trying to change entire millennia. How they are able to do this, no one is sure, though rumors of a DeLorean DMC-12 have been circulating. The outcomes of the project have, thus far, been very good for us for everyone. There was one unfortunate incident when a user tried to give his parents millions of dollars before he was born, but the extra money forced them to separate before he was conceived. All of a sudden he didn't exist, but then if he didn't exist, how could he have gone back in time to change anything? It caused a huge rift in space/time, a bit of a bother really. But we're happy to report that everything has been sorted out with no casualties only one casualty! Remarks from the community on the process have been nothing but positive. "In order to walk the road of peace, we need to climb the mountain of conflict," notable scholar TKF exclusively commented. We have our entire staff working around the clock to figure out what this means as we speak. Town drunk Dexter111344 was also heard mumbling about the subject. He blamed wizards for the whole thing, before stumbling away, probably to make more links to A wizard did it. Regardless, whether its wizards or time machines, the editing of the past continues as we speak, and will continue until all of history has been changed. Or until we get bored and move onto something else. Uncyclopedia Editors Conflicted Over Story Topic By Gerrycheevers Owing to the large amount of things happening in the last week, and also to the fact that this issue is unforgivably late, the editors of the UnSignpost were unable to settle on a single topic for the second story of this week's edition. The editors were also unable to agree on either two topics for a rare three-story issue or how many UnSignpost editors it takes to screw in a lightbulb (the UnSignpost staff has been left to ponder this question in the dark). As a decision could not be reached, it was decided after much deliberation and petty arguing that all of the candidate stories be mentioned rapid-fire in a single story, so as to confuse and irritate the reader and cause him to be required to navigate back to this issue to click on all of the links. These stories are as follows: Zombiebaron returns and petitions to end voting. His effort is parodied, rebutted, and parodied again. A link to Requested Articles is placed on the sidebar and MadMax commences handing out badges to requested article creators. Zombiebaron returns again to demand reskins, which we understand means he needs to replace all of his undead flesh with "fresh flesh". Cajek returns, but not really. VFH maxes out at 23 nominations at press time, including some discussion-inducing selections. More events certainly occured, but we can't be arsed to list everything for you.

Check out these pages! UN:REQ Gone Wilde! All the Greatest Music of the 80s, on Three Great Cassettes! Whose Sandwich? From our logs: 14:47, 26 July 2009 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 8 hours ‎(I banned a guy for too long this one time. Then I had nachos.) 20:40, 29 July 2009 MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) blocked MadMax (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 Minute (Constantly littering recent changes with thousands of really useful edits.) 20:45, 29 July 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 3 minutes ‎(Not having enough tits.) 15:17, 30 July 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 122.173.57.31 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎(blanking? why not just wear a t-shirt proudly declaiming "I have no life"? it has much the same effect, but you might get away with claiming it's ironic...) Biopic of the Week Touching down on the Uncyclopedia runway in December '08, Saberwolf116 has quickly become one of the all-time great Pee Reviewers. With 86 of them under his belt, Saber has recently ridden off into a yellow sunset to pursue some sort of education, or something along those lines that will detract from his Uncyclopedia-ing. Return soon, fair Saberwolf! Old-School Featured Article of the Week Bold Speech to text software bold is the most wide Lee used applicate shin by lacy people who can knot be bother to type. It's bark tech know lodge-y has vast Lee bark improve in Reese cent years. Bark bark it is not recommend Ed bark four use in bark off is spaces bark with noisy bark dogs. Diabolical Plan to Overtake the Wiki of the Week It seems that UnSignpost co-chief editor Under user has recently succeeded in the first stages of producing a sewer-dwelling offspring (pictured). Rumors of UU using the as-yet-unnamed biological sockpuppet for activities of questionable morality are unconfirmed. Congratulations, UU! Reader Poll Results Last week we asked loyal UnSignpost readers to weigh in on the immensely interesting issue of formatting. There was no clear consensus on the subject, as it seems Uncyclopedians employ the full range of screen resolutions, and as such it's a wonder anyone can read the UnSignpost at all. The most telling aspect of the poll was its response rate, indicating that a full eight people read the UnSignpost.

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It's on time, you were just high and didn't realize when it got here! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 22:51, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks...

..for the offer of help on the Princess Diana article. It's just been reviewed by POTR and going through some changes. Any help is appreciated or comments about what you think. I did remove all the quotes although some have crept back in. What do you think about them - I personally didn't like them much from the beginning, although some quotes that are actually funny wouldn't be a bad idea. Calindreams 11:32, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks, genuinely

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

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I know this doesn't really matter much, since you've gotten them tons, but I need some way to say thanks for that pee review. Thouroughly helpful, crystal-clear, very useful for improving the article. Which I'm doing right now, by the way. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go have some coffee or something. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 13:25, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Sherlock Holmes

I tried to mix more prose in. The article had a fever, and the only prescription for it was MORE PROSE. Sir MacMania GUN— 13:40, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

• Sorry. Anyway, how does it look? Sir MacMania GUN— 13:40, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Hey, Chief! Thanks for the very helpful review on Kriptonite

I did EVERYTHING you told me to do, can you again take a look and see if it's feature worth now? Much appreciated.--Rsbj66 19:52, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Mega!

Ta for another mega review, Cheif, though I'd just like to stress that Nameable did most of the work before I even got there, I just did some rewording. I don't know what you mean by me slipping persons though; that only happens switching from narrative to dialoge. Anyway either me or Nameable will definitly do something more with it. And while we're here would you mind taking a glance at this and tell me wither or not it's a good idea? Nothing in depth just a thumbs up or down on concept because it's not done yet.    Orian57    Talk   21:20 5 August 2009

I will do, I'll take a look for you very shortly, I have to sleep first because I was like being employed all day. Oh and well done to Nameable in that case.

AGH, even in your comment, you dare defile my talk page with a capital AND?!? That is like, so not mega.--ChiefjusticeDS 21:49, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Hmm, I know it's technically incorrect but people do it teh whole time in speach. And I've seen it doe in loads of modern literature. It's becomming more and more a personal taste thing. But if you don't like it that's fine.    Orian57    Talk   22:32 5 August 2009

Indeed, it doesn't really bother me, it only gets to me in some of your articles, you write so well and then there is an error, it's just me getting emotionally involved, you can ignore it for the most part. --ChiefjusticeDS 06:52, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Just popping by to say...

...awesome reviewing, I don't know how you do it. It takes me about 3 hours just to do an average sized article, but I saw a couple you've had recently (that I've stayed well away from) that I can't believe anyone would have the motivation to do once, never mind on a rate of one or two a day. Kudos!

And I promise never to commit the gross crimes against the English language on your page that Orian does :D --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 21:57, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Hey, thanks very much, It's always nice to get recognition for doing reviews. Yours are pretty impressive from what I've seen and you should try to keep it up as much as you can. It's always good to see new people around the PEE review.

On the grammar front, Orian's many many crimes against English get to me because I think he puts them in just to annoy me, don't go taking lessons from him because he will corrupt you, and the next thing you know you will be featured 3 days in a row too.--ChiefjusticeDS 06:58, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks!

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my recently featured article

Your support is greatly appreciated.

—Guildensternenstein

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—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:59, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Personal request

I am sure you get asked allllllooooooot, but you are the only one who reviews in such away that I am able to take your advice and like make an article awesome. I wrote an article recently, and it's probably my best effort for an article so far... If you ever have time, I am in no rush; would you take a look at the pee review for Jonathan Livingston Chicken for me?

Thanks Chief! Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 07:01, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Sure, I'm about to review the James Blunt article, once I've done that I will head on over to your article and say that I'm going to do it. Then you should have the review within 24 hours. --ChiefjusticeDS 07:06, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks chief you truly are the best :P Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 07:32, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Sankyuu

It occured to me that I forgot to thank you for your review of the 500ft article that I made, so thank you. I'm going to try and help out continuing to review some articles as well so that you don't get too overworked ^^. I was also just wondering if you wouldn't mind looking over the article again in it's current form and tell me if you think it is on the right track as far as increasing the humour count goes, and whether you think the current version takes away the encyclopedic tone too much. I got another review done by a different guy which gave me a significantly lower score than the original one that you gave me, which kind of shocked me because I thought I had improved it based upon the suggestions given in your review. I guess you can place it down to the differences in a persons opinion and psyche as he didn't recognise it as a parody using a serious tone for an imaginary creature and instead focused upon the fact that the article makes a lot of references to the turd word. But now I'm sounding bitchy >_<". At the moment the current one includes a slightly increased number of popular culture references based the comments made in the second review...so yeah. Thanks again. Sequence 12:57, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Yes, I'll take a look, I did see the new review and thought it did leave something to be desired, but people are different and it was his first review, we all learn sometime right? I have Acrolo's one to review first but should get this and many other things done shortly. Also, it's no problem and it's always nice to get positive feedback on the reviews. --ChiefjusticeDS 14:22, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Just popping in to say thanks again for looking into the article again. I'll keep on working on it and hopefully someday it might be good enough to be put on VFH. Sequence 12:54, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks again Chief!

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

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Pish posh I wont stop giving you these shiny awards as long as you review so awesome mkay! I will be working on the minorities... :) Thanks Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 04:48, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Cheerio

50% off

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your next prescription of Cheerios (avenasativa) tablets.
Offer valid only in California. Offer applies only with a doctor's consent and prescription. Thank you for voting for the featuring of Cheerios. Your support is much appreciated. Discount available only before time on signature. Therefore discount is void everywhere. Sorry.
Sir MacMania GUN— 15:56, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

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Thank you for voting. Sir MacMania GUN— 16:06, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

And before I forget, thanks for the great reviews:

Rejoice, ChiefjusticeDS! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

Sir MacMania GUN— 16:06, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Firefly

Perhaps it's slightly better now? Sir MacMania GUN— 21:44, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

You have now earned this

Platinum Pisser

Rejoice! Your colossal achievement of completing over 50 in-depth pee reviews has been recognised with the provision of this luxury micturitional accessory. You will be the envy of your friends. Or you would be, if you hadn't ignored them for ages while you were reviewing.

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Only one more reviewing award to grab, and at this rate you'll have that tied up by next month... --UU - natter 18:40, Aug 8

Grats cheif. I should really grab the diamond dumper this month. At least pretend to be pulling my weight.    Orian57    Talk   18:43 8 August 2009

Chief you make us all look pathetic. I can't look at myself in the mirror anymore and it's all due to your courageous front line peeing. If I could make a template, I'd make an extra fucking special award template all for you, thank you very much for your consistent hard work and patience and hopefully someone will give you a due break soon.

I'm trying to do a review a day just to help out but we definitely need more reviewers--El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 21:01, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Star Wars 2010

Perhaps this is better? Sir MacMania GUN—[23:58 8 Aug 2009]

Hi Chief

Just to apologise for the multi-booking. I chose to do the Metal Pipes one today because as far as I'm aware Legolas was blocked (or warned or something) for flooding the pee review board (am I right?) and therefore considered this nulled until I heard otherwise. I informed MacMania that I would be a little longer with his and since it is a very long and detailed article I felt I should take more time with it (more than I have tonight anyway). You must have written those messages just after I started writing the review, I had no idea it took me so long...

Again, sorry, it won't happen again and I will forfeit one of the two I have booked if you wish--El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 22:30, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Incidentally, if it's any comfort, we both gave exactly the same overall score :D --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 22:33, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Heh, I was going to do one last night and saw that you had booked them all. Now I can't do any today because the images aren't working properly >_<. --Sequence 04:31, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Apologies Sequence, if you're still wanting one, Lost in Space and Chutes and Ladders are still up. I am planning to do Sherlock, then EHarmony. I spoke to Legolas last night and he's fine about it. --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 09:21, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Hey, it's OK Sid it's not often I have to tell someone off for trying to do too much work. As far as the hitting people with pipes review goes I doubt that it will be much of a problem, the person has lots of feedback and can make use of all of it. I guess the scores matching like that means we thought pretty much the same thing about it. Anyway, I must go make coffee and review an article. --ChiefjusticeDS 07:42, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Limey Bastards

Not for the first time has someone removed or changed the image referring to limey bastard's? Is it overly offensive/inappropriate? It's just that being english myself I know a lot of limey bastards myself! It wasn't my image to start with but I think it is quite funny. Calindreams 11:06, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

OK, if you want a verdict on that one I need to see the image, second if it was an Admin who did it there isn't much that I can do about it. If you think it has been unfairly removed or changed then speak to an Admin (or if an Admin got rid of it, that Admin). Be polite and considerate, they appreciate that, if they go against you then that's the way it is, don't get annoyed. I will help you if I can do, but my influence is limited in that respect. --ChiefjusticeDS 21:00, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Thank you

For the compliment and the general support in my first month (ok, ok, 42 days). Everyone's very kind here, there's a helluva lot of talent (yourself included chief) and I hope I can settle in, do more review and maybe, MAYBE, even finish an article some day. Once again thanks :) --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 21:46, 10 August 2009 (UTC)