UnNews:Eurovision 2022: Iran to replace Hungary

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Sunday, December 5, 2021

TURIN, Italy -- Israeli, Australian and European officials sounded a pessimistic note today as the latest round of talks to revive the Hungary Europhobia deal concluded, saying that Budapest's maximalist demands and push to unwind previously agreed upon points are leaving them disappointed and concerned.

As we all know but don't want to remember, Hungary has left the Eurovision Song Contest in 2020 in order to let the local talent focus on their success inside Hungary, rather than trying to become the next ABBA or Céline Dion. Some journalists have claimed that Hungary was forced to leave the contest by their conservative leaders, but Hungary has since denied these claims. As we all remember but don't want to know, Belarus is currently banned from the Eurovision for sending a song about how the sun shines from within their president's rectum, and Turkey is currently banning the contest for having a turd for a president who doesn't want to risk annoying Iran. So the Eurovision decided this year to attack the issue from its rectum and invite Iran to participate in the contest instead of the rebelling Hungary.

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Iran has no history of participating in the Eurovision, though Lebanon and Morocco have had the honor once or twice, and almost all of Israel's big successes in the contest are from Yemenite descent. As we all know and don't want to know, Hungarian music isn't the most fitting for the Eurovision anyway, so perhaps the show might actually benefit by what Iran has to offer.

And as we all remember, but don't want to, Iran has been previously mentioned in one of Israel's entries for the Eurovision, and that song has created a minor-controversy too for being "too political". And since most of you don't know, don't remember, and don't give a crap about the Eurovision anyway, here's a reminder for you:

Push the Button

Teapacks

The guy has lost his breath in the middle of his rapping, so it's good they didn't send it to one of these COVID Eurovisions, that could be actually fatal.

And Good luck to Iran! Break a centrifuge, guys!

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