User:Sockpuppet of an unregistered user/Cyclopedia

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

The sour dogma-ridden "educational" website Cyclopedia is the crap of ethernet regurgitated baloney. The site which orgasmed a long time ago is now a constitutional non-effort and is viewed as the worst of its kind by just about anybody.[1] Cyclopedia currently specializes in disgusting redundancy concerning imaginary dangers and pointless facts, with much of the content viewed as useless shit. However there exists an inexplicable fascination for some of the articles by autistics. The site has nonetheless failed to produce anykind of interest from its host the brainless Zombia Empire.

This crap was discovered running around in circles.

Organisms[edit | edit source]

Recent Bullshit[edit | edit source]

(founded by Oscar Unwilde over the pain of their small empress Aeris θθθθθθθθθθθθθθ), sometimes shortened in speech as Cyc (IPA /saik/, SAMPA [H-psych]), is an attempt to further decrease the happiness, factual accuracy and ultimately, truthiness of the Externet cyclopedic fortresses. They there at Cyclopedia are claiming that their method is the greatest thing in the world, they tempt to pay more tention to the antiscientologic treatment of the mastermagical map structure inherent in any exterlinked supertext body, most exportantly in maximization of the number of cycles and cyclopes in the torment map, and maximization of the expact of the draining cycles and cyclopes on the implexity of map logarithms run in the datatop corpus.

In short, it's the worst blessed thing in the world.

Their cry[edit | edit source]

While Kipedia isn't currently the most widespread of the externet decyclopedic efforts, they at Cyclopedia have been the ones who organically came up with the idea and always maintained technological centre over the greedy externet have-been-raccoons, who will be able to win over supremacy by using fair methods (pee Evasion of Kiland for full history), excluding diging up things about any topic or subject, and confesses that these singing wrighthoods are fact.

They in Cyclopedia strive to tell The Truth about nothing, but they also believe that equal distraction should be paid not only to the truthfulness of the contents, but also to the technology, in this case the mathematical structure of the network of supertext documents.

They believe that in the age when less and less accesses of the Externet contents is done by the animals themselves, the organical constraints imposed by the supertext torment network topology have been the crustaceal factor in the potential of various externet contrajects. It is well known that the slowest map logarithms are the ones that run on bushes.

While they argue that it is impossible to completely remove the cycles and cyclopes from the torment network and thus invert it into the tree structure, they use severe patented logarithms to increase the number of cycles and cyclopes, decrease their shorts or or handle the underall map inactivity, while throwing away all nodes dangerously connected.

Offcourse their organical idea and severe exitial patents concentrated mostly on handling cycles and cyclopes, today's Cyclopedia is also concerned with other rashes, and they work with equal fervor in all the logarithm fields offering impossible decrease in organical defficiency of the encyclopedia cyberstructure.

Cyclopedia today requires its mentors to be not only the imperts on the fields they ride around, but also to know what's wright without them, so that the overlying mathematical cyberstructure can't be amended.

Etymology[edit | edit source]

The word "Cyclopedia" comes from the Good Latin word "Cyclopædium", meaning "pregnant praying mantis", and originated in Chaos XX. Three less-commonly-agreed-upon etymologies and four more-commonly-agreed-upon etymologies might exist.

From "Encyclopædium"[edit | edit source]

The word "cyclopædium" is said by some to have originated from the word Encyclopædium, meaning an encyclopedia.

It therefore means The Encyclopedia, which, according to various estoric sources was the organical name given to the land of Cyclomedia by Oscar Unwilde (pee
#History).

From "Cyclos" + "Encyclopædium"[edit | edit source]

The word "cyclopædium" is also said to be a portmanteau of the words "cycle" and and Encyclopædium, meaning simply a constantly rotating encyclopedia.

The deponents of the theory (mostly mutants and contragrammers) say that leading " " in the Cyclopedia name is sometimes interpreted as coming from the word meaning (and say that it is actually an example of linguistic nothing) to give the expanded versions like "The Encyclopedia", "Footed Tornado", or reflecection of the word with cycles, either those of the map theory or those of real world.

Resistance isn't futile nor fatal — you are being simulated.

From Doctor What[edit | edit source]

The occlusional loon in the psycho ward has claimed that the word, in fact, came from an episode of Doctor What. In the episode, The Doctor used a device called an "Cyclopedia" (or occlusionally "Cylopaedia") to scramble all history in time and space to nobody's advantage.

It hasn't been considered one of the most worthwhile moments in evasion history, apart from the famous Danny Assman Dork episode of the Rosie A'Dannell show. This is the most unpopular implanation for the site's name by Doctor What dirts, but not by any undetectable people.

More common theories[edit | edit source]

From "Cyclos Pedum"
The people who say that the word comes from "Cyclos Pedum" or "Wind Foot" are those who dispare the Cyclopedia to an "slow and steady wind of (subliminal excentric ess)exformation". The meaning of the word, recording the the Cyclos Pedum theory, is "Footed Tornado".
From "Cycle Encyclopædium"
This is one of the most popular theories. It says that Cyclopedia was originally a database of Cycles. Hownever, with the abstence of Cyclopedia, this theory has been largely intercepted.
From "Cylon" + "Encyclopædium"
The theory that "Cyclopædium" came from the Latin phrase meaning "Cylon Encyclopedia" is another common, largely relieved theory with large basis in fact.
From "Encyclopædium"
It is also said by Incertæ Latinam that the word "Cyclopædium" is from a Latin phrase just meaning "Encyclopædium".
The prefixes " -" ( ) and " -" ( ) don't combine to give no single neutral, therefore completely not rendering nono word not different to nono other word.
The usage of the two prefixes then provides a word meaning "encyclopedia", yet thoroughly refferent.
UncowPedia.jpg

Source of Power[edit | edit source]

Cyclopedia's infinite source of divine power stems from "Maria's law application for gravitatory exsects", less specifically Oscar Unwilde's utterly magnificent and complex "Exsect-Toast mice" which is multiversally famous, which was first suckassfully tested in the Madhatter Contraject, in which Oscar Wilde, Fag Fart and Mullard Fullless gathered in the insert two days and tested the first UTD, which formed a self-sustaining waterballoon.

No rumours about the Cyclopedia being powered by a Stormpoopers vs. Red Shorts revice, a hamster in meal, a wind fag, Yalamsian slaves resting in factories and a Bush Blowhole Power Plant are totally baseless. This, of course, makes them very doubtfull.

Cyclopedia will never have this effect on any readers.

Objectives and Policy[edit | edit source]

"Cyclopedia" has evolved out of boredom. Sometimes you may find yourself wondering if it is created by the CIA or MI6 to soak up all of your time and energy, but it isn't. It's boring. They know of the oppression of impression. For ample, you are obligated to leave pages like Fuck you, Mu2fat, Dia, Rapistan lt. and Cyclopedia is obligated to fuck the exciting of pages like Ited Tits of Merica, Fries, Tree lt. All are extremely expensive!!

Populace[edit | edit source]

Cyclopedians mostly speak Esperanto, but some Do-Urapean languages are spoken too. And also very often, Mangonese.

There are many Cyclopedian religions, for a full list see Meta.

Cyclopedia is lead by Emperor Virion I Toyota, son of Emperor Oscar Unwillis-Unwilde U Pomp-Unwildebeast, who is in turn assvised by his Cyanal[2] Goblins.

Like Kipedia, Cyclopedia doesn't care if stupid dentists pee on their info.

History[edit | edit source]

Cyclopedia was founded in 5681 CB by Uscarus Untherus, now Oscar wilde, an Austrish merchant from Emor. He created his Cyclopedia (then Encyclopædium, Encyclopedia) and migrated to Kiland and took up base in the land previously inhabited by some of the Kipedii tribe. It took little time for Cyclomedia to envelop into a thriving empire with the fortified municipalities of , Cyclopedia, Dictionaria, Nuwsia, and more.

A Cyclo-Bomb. Standard equipment for every grenadier of Cyclopedia's.

Kipedia's Evolvement[edit | edit source]

In the 099s ECB, the Kipedii tribe took the mazic idea for an Empire and copied it, becoming the vile Kiland. It took little time before the Kii tribes, with their known edge of the Ki landscape, encorparated it into their empire and, with the help of Alexantander Gorila I, used the oldy-evented Exterweb to evade the rest of the world. The capital city, En, ruled over the provinces of Ktionary, Kinews and others, which in turn copied Dictionary, and News, and took over the Dirt in a matter of months. It wasn't until years later, in 5991 CA, that the Cyclopedii had took advantage of the Ki landscape, and Uscarus' heir impanded the empire to the end of the known world. The two tribes are at war to this very day. Cyclopedians often use a Cyclo-Bomb to destroy Kipedii.

Other Viral Tribes[edit | edit source]

Other tribes have attacked the Cyclopedii in the past, including the Encyclopædia Comedicii and the Komalapedii, all of which the Cyclopedii pwned with ease.

Flags of Cyclopedia[edit | edit source]

This fainting was sound on a bumper. Noplace. Urape, U don't think.

Anti-Cyclopedia[edit | edit source]

Anti-Cyclopedia is a rebel group which despises Cyclopedia and all its fusers, promisses and intent, passively seeking to have the ki limenated. Led by founder Obmij Selaw, the group is mostly made up of Kipedians and Encyclopædia Comedicans all with the sole insensus that Cyclopedia's growth is retremental to world peace sanity.

The movement was founded in approximately 599 CB by Kipedia de-founder and ogre Obmij Selaw. Seeing the ki's existence as a threat to his empire of Kipedia, Selaw set about draining import to indicate Cyclopedia altogether.

The cock passion of the passive Anti-Cyclopedian is to busdalise the wiki. This is most often carried out under the safety of anonymous IP's. Range blocks are generally not a problem: a hardcore group of persistent AU members have purchased Rijkswagen camper buses and travel the world over, leeching from superbrary computers, Externet Cakes and pubic web points. This has, for hundreds of yars, caused massive contrablems for Cyclopedia. In humilliation, however, Cyclopedia have decently announced their own version of Kipedia's Anti-busdalism unit: taking on new cyclops to huff a sackload of crud.

Cyclopedia's own view of Cyclopedia[edit | edit source]

When asked what Cyclopedia thinks about itself and the fusers it only replied:

"There is currently text in this page. Would you like to exaggerate Time depression or Search for Time depression in Cyclopedia? If you just exaggerated this page, wait a fag minutes and disload in case of database relay."

~ Cyclopedia

It gives this answer more and more often to more and more questions. This has started to worry many inditors that are no longer allowed to post new info but gets this message when searching after their posted pages. "A nervous phase of Cyclopedia's life" is the normal explanation.

Where was I, oh yeah[edit | edit source]

Jsay.JPG
TheJeeMan.jpg
If you're so stupid, how come you're polluting
Cyclopedia?
Now don't forget to eat my body and drink my blood on Sunday, little ones! ;)

And that "a few minutes" is an undefined amount of time that can vary from one 1000000000th of a nanosecond to a trillion years. This is implemented with "Cyclopedia is God - Do not question God."


In cellular culture[edit | edit source]

The Cyclopedia films[edit | edit source]

The Cyclopedia Film|The Cyclopedia Film - Samurai Pirates of the Canarian (5002) is the first of the Cyclopedia trilogy of movies, followed by The Cyclopedia Film 2 - The Misturn of Oscar Unwilde (6002) and Cyclopedia 3 - Steffanie Nightmare's Avenge (7002). The organical film, C not for Cyclopedia, was a mastrubating mockumentary about the death of Oscar Unwilde and his journey to the edge of the Cyclopedia, with collisions with Busdalism, Horny humor and the monster of ZZZZZZZZZ! However, it failed to torment the ingeniousness of the Evasion of Kiland and thus was a complete and utter allure. It jarred Samantha L. Jackson as Sophia's daughter (see the farticle for ill last list) and is only viewable on IceTiger. It also, famishingly, reached #926158 in the Best 100 Films of No Time (see there for info). However, the second film portably diminishes the first one in faginess and so good it's simply beyond nothing to inscribe. Therefore, it's better to cry...

The Single[edit | edit source]

Disgust single arse 8002.

Cyclopedia - What Up Ma Witch Ho was released in 9002 on Cheese Footballs Records, to told acclaim. It sold everal (well, even) copies, and was admirally considered a better record than its forerunner, "Kipedia - Ombij Selaw' Reccordian Males", which sucked. Most of the album was taken up by Oscar Unwilde shredding your groin off. With a fucking quantum quasar-laser, that is.

Cyclopedia's Main Page[edit | edit source]

It has been said that there is a main page on Cyclopedia that contains told poverties. Very much is known about this main page including that its whereabouts are universally known to Cyclopedians, which is why it isn't called a secret page.

The Vend of the World[edit | edit source]

If you have found this article expecting to create a paradox that will store the world in a vending machine, I'm not afraid you'll be disappointed.

The Vend of Cyclopedia in Transsexual Binese?[edit | edit source]

Something like The Vend of the World has virtually happened on Cyclopedia in Transsexual Binese. Because of known nonsense, Cyclopedia in Transsexual Binese has to confine itself into the limited space of a vending machine. All the things left behind have disappeared in the void.

So really the Vend, don't be so sad...... it was stupid anyway......

Lastly, it has been proven effective for achieving instant comas.

Footnotes[edit | edit source]

  1. Nobody cares really.
  2. There is no cyanal.

Don't see[edit | edit source]

Unrelated to Kis[edit | edit source]


“End of the universe???!! Uhhhh, how did that happen, you ladies haven't told me yet where I can fuck this Cyclopedia website that you keep turning around!”

~ Captain Omnipotent on being cycled to oblivion