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Kreplakistan is the only country and so far only human settlement on Mars.

Kreplakistanis[edit | edit source]

The settlers are of Russian origin, and they were shot up in space to Mars from the Red Square of Moscow in 1979. Only Russians dared to volunteer because they're generally fine with "bad" breathing air. Unlike earthly Russians, who are Lutheran and known for their honesty, their Martian counterparts are extremely corrupt. So in Mars, everything is paid for with bribes.

Lifestyle[edit | edit source]

Kreplakistanis live in caves and are active mostly during the night when it isn't so hot. Caves are not decorated because the settlers never learned decoration in Russia. Their main source of food is Martian aliens, whose meat is good but disgustingly green in color, even after cooking. Alien hunting season (1st Jan - 31th Dec) is popular practice among Kreplakistan's men. The aliens are mostly hunted with decoys and traps. Vegetary food comes from the plants which grow outside pretty happily, due to CO2-rich atmosphere. However the photosynthesis makes the plants release dangerous gases like methane which can accidentally burn the crops. Daytime they sleep hanging in the ceiling from their feet.

Population[edit | edit source]

Kreplakistan's population is now 500,000, original settlers were only 10. This rapid growth is due to Martian climate and alien meat which makes them more fertile and they grow unusually fast.

Aliens[edit | edit source]

The original inhabitants of Mars. They extract sour pear juice and they eat gummy bears, which are abundant on Mars but Kreplakistanis don't care about such things. Their meat is eaten with local vodka made of the alien pear juice. Kreplakistanis also make kebab out of it.

Geography[edit | edit source]

Kreplakistan covers whole Mars area so far.

Landscape[edit | edit source]

Mostly red sand and rough red stones. Like Nevada, only without Las Vegas.

Climate[edit | edit source]

Dry, occasional sandstorms, very low air pressure. Stay inside if your eyes and lungs are important for you.

Religion[edit | edit source]

Kreplakistanis are very religious. Their religion is Martian Orthodoxy, which promotes corruption and bribery. This ideology makes them economically competitive and Kreplakistan is the leading (and..well, only) economy on Mars.

Trivia[edit | edit source]

Kreplakistan was incorrectly referred to as earthly country in Austin Powers-movies. Moreover, they don't have any nuclear warheads, even though such are being developed (unsuccessfully, due to pervasive corruption).