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Y is TEXAN, Y'ALL!!!!!. Loves to play the drums, and usually hang out with musicians. This user is a purple-spleened administrator and messing with him/her could result in a ban. Knight Commander of the Order gobshite noob UOTM. ROTFL. (Full article...)

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Did you know...

*... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"?

... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"?
... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"?
... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"?

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On this day...
May 4: "May the Schwartz Be With You" Day 1904 - USA begins first efforts to curb illegal immigration with groundbreaking of Panama Canal, separating North and South America. 1953 - Ernest Hemingway awarded the Pulitzer Prize for his maritime opus, Shark Tale. 1960 - John Prescott wins the first of many pie eating contests. 1961 - Martin Luther King has a dream about going to school naked. 1978 - First recorded use of totally lame Star Wars May 4th pun by 8-year old girl. Parents cry, bullies begin to encircle. 1980 - Ronald Reagan loses in a winner-take all paintball tournament sponsored by Jodie Foster. 2004 - First annual Nigerian Email Writers Convention held. 2005 - The entire country of Portugal secedes and moves to Canada. View tomorrow – More anniversaries...

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The American military routinely uses the elderly for weapons testing, as a way to control population growth and keep the price of prunes low.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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