You cannot help Uncyclopedia. There is no hope now.
“My pee has dried up into crystals that absorb into the untato for stupendous performance.”
“The Untato has been the best battery for electric wheelchairs on wheels.”
The Untato is the official logo of Uncyclopedia. Untato is a portmanteau word blending Uncyclopedia and potato.
The untato is technically a brain that connects to the Uncyclomedia servers that power up all the Uncyclomedia projects including Undictionary, UnBooks, UnMeta-Wiki, Uncyclomedia Commons, UnNews, etc. The untato has odd brain cells that look similar to ugly brain cells on ugly human beings that don't think straight; but unlike those rednecks, Uncyclopedia is fully dedicated to being satirical with good faith; and reduced slandanity.
The untato has been invented by Wheely Willy after Wikipedia has been vandalized to the point where it is now useless. Back then, he has used untatoes to power his wheelchair after being bit by Eddie McDowd when Willy was reverted to a human being.
When the Untato was being experimented with; Willy ended up mass producing this piece of shit to power up Potatoland where the Uncyclomedia servers are located. Oscar Wilde stuck his penis in an untato so he could pee out bodily acids required for sufficient operation. Whilst doing so, Oscar was practicing for homosexual acts that he was eventually imprisoned for.
Stupid people who see untatoes eat them, and end up with upset stomachs after ingesting indigestable matter. Under no circumstances, shall anybody consume an Untato, a mistake like that can prove superfatal. However, urine soaking does add flavor to an untato. Go ahead. Try it. It tastes great. Just put that urine soaked piece in your mouth. That's right...
Ingredients / Tools[edit source]
- 1 Puzzle potato.
- 1 Magic Marker.
- 1 Knife.
- 1 Ancient Book of Symbols.
- Hollow out potato.
- Bless potato with Native American magick and Egyptian knowledge.
- Cut potato skin into 32 jigsaw-puzzle pieces. DO NOT ALLOW THE PIECES TO FALL OUT!
- Remove one piece, so there are 31 pieces in the potato.
- On each piece, draw a mystical symbol from the book using the magic marker.
- One the final piece that you removed, add the symbol on page 31,337,999 of the book.
- Hide the final piece where nobody can find it, and sell the whereabouts on eBay (starting bid of $999.99).
- Congratulations! You now have 97.875% of an Untato and are roughly $1000 better off! Well Done!