Cheep Cheep
- If you have short-term memory loss and also can't spell, maybe you're looking for Cheap?
“I got fished!”
Cheep Cheeps (from the Vietnamese "chép" meaning "stupid fish") are cosplaying, obese Magikarps (see History). The Cheep Cheep species used to exist, but it was driven to extinction in 1983 due to government influence. Some scientists have tried to recreate them using genetic engineering, but they were stopped due to them "being drunk as hell" and "need to go to sleep before he accidentally blows up this joint"[1].
History[edit | edit source]
Cheep Cheeps were created by some drunk asian guy in 1983. Shortly after, a turtle broke through the window of the asian guy's house and stole them all. He tried to brainwash them, but it turns out they have no brains to wash. The turtle wasn't happy with this, because he didn't like dirty brains. He ended up throwing them into the ocean out of anger.
Cheep Cheeps became an invasive species. Some protesting hippies tried to convince Mario to kill all the dumb fish with his fire hand powers. He said no, because then he would have to go into water levels and everyone hates water levels[2]. The Cheep Cheeps began to kill all other ocean life besides Bloopers, because nobody can kill those damn things. Eventually, the government mandated "Cheepburgers" to be served at every meal. This law was later named the "Great Cheep Cheep Feast of 1983". Fishing companies went into overdrive catching and shipping the fish off to factories to be violently killed. The species went extinct in a matter of days.
Any Cheep Cheeps you see today are either robots, something from a mad scientist's basement, cosplaying Magikarps (see above section), a different drunk asian guy, robots, animatronics, or robots.
Appearance[edit | edit source]
There were many different types of Cheep Cheeps. How there became so many in around a month isn't a question we'd like to ask.
- Red Cheep Cheeps: Some of these hop around, some of them go back and forth, and some of them don't.
- Green Cheep Cheeps: Some of these move in a straight line forever, without stopping until their death. We could learn a lesson from these lime-colored fish. But the rest of them hop around or go back and forth like the other ones.
- Gray Cheep Cheeps: These exist?
- Deep Cheeps: These lime-colored fish have actual brains. They (and some Spiny Cheep Cheeps) showed up a few hours after the normal ones, so the turtle washed their brains correctly into thinking plumbers are the root of global warming. The fish still got thrown into the ocean, though.
- Eep Cheeps: These fish are absolute wimps.
- Porcupuffers: Porcupuffers are the only types of Cheep Cheeps to still be surviving today. This is due to how they murder all fishermen and others that try to kill them. They are also explosive.
- Spiny Cheep Cheeps: These are smaller Porcupuffers, but they act like Deep Cheeps. Lame knockoffs.
- Beep Cheeps: These Cheep Cheeps inhabited alarm clocks instead of water. They died out due to being thrown out of windows.
Notable Cheep Cheeps[edit | edit source]
Some Cheep Cheeps have done very heroic deeds. Here are none of them.
- Sushie: Sushie was a purple Cheep Cheep. Her only purpose in life was to help Mario clip into the ground to get a faster speedrun time.
- Stewart: Steward was a blimp conductor who made Goombella break the fourth wall. He wore a very fashionable tie.
- Chef Shimi: Chef Shimi was a chef on a train. Some fat toad stole his pot.
- Cheepskipper: Not much is known about this Cheep Cheep, besides that he was defeated in around 45 seconds. Experts suggest this is why not much is known about this Cheep Cheep.
- Bessie Bass: Contrary to popular belief, Bessie Bass is not a bass, and is in fact a Cheep Cheep. She got cursed by a wizard and became large.
- Mr. Kipper: Mr. Kipper is not a Cheep Cheep, and is instead a middle-aged man in a dead-end office job whose name happens to sound like a fish name.
- Mr. Kipper: A lone Mr. Kipper survived the Great Cheep Cheep Feast of 1983. He became an activist and was killed by riot police.
Involvement in the 2008 United States presidential election[edit | edit source]
Cheep Cheeps had no involvement in the 2008 United States presidential election, although conspiracy theorists would tell you otherwise.
Games[edit | edit source]
Since most Cheep Cheeps were killed off quickly, games that feature real ones will be shown. Other appearances will be unmarked. If you still can't tell which is which, that's not our problem.
- Super Mario Bros (real)
- Super Mario Bros 2: The Found Levels
- Super Mario Bros 2: America is Full of Babies So Here's An Easier Game For Them
- Super Mario Bros 3
Super Mario Bros 4Super Mario World: The Name is Original So That Means The Game is Too- Super Mario 3D World (Porcupuffers and robots)
- Super Mario 4D World
- Super Mario 8D World
- Super Mario Maker 2 (Porcupuffers and robots)
- Super Mario 3D Maker
- Super Mario 4D Maker: We're Not Done Milking This "Dimensions" Joke Yet
- Super Mario 8D Maker
- Super Mario 12D World
After this game, the target audience's brains exploded, and Ningbo Co. shut down.
Footnotes[edit | edit source]
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