Ancient Kittenolivia

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Aanchius Katteno
The Ancient Kittenolivian Empire
Ancient Kittenolivia
Aleksandr.JPG 5Glude.jpg
(Flag) (Great Seal)
Motto: Vaton Taxui
(English: Texas Horray)
Anthem: MMMMMMM...mice
Kittenolivian location.PNG
Capital Sparta
 Previous capital Little Mice
Official languages Cat's Meow
Last emperor Gady, Björk's ancestor, 800 AD
Government ???
National Hero(es) ???
of Formation
100 BC
Religion self-worship, Kittenanity, mouse sacrifice, human/moogle sacrifice, fish sacrifice
 Population 14,000,000
 Area Half the size of Texas
 Ethnic groups Kittens, Cats, Dogs, Mud Puppies, Mayans, Lions[1]

Ancient Kittenolivia was a old, pre-Columbian empire that appered on 100 BC on Central America. It was a precedent of modern Kittenolivia.


The remains of an ancient human sacrifice.

While the Ancient Kittenolivia area was initially inhabited around the 8th millennium BC, the first clearly “Ancient Kittenolivia” settlements were established in approximately 1800 BC in Üpzst region of the Pacific Coast. Archaeological evidence[2] suggests the construction of ceremonial architecture in Ancient Kittenolivian area by approximately 1000 BC, approximately on Aug. 4, 21:33 A.M. not by Shakespeare. Ancient Kittenolivia was formed when many kitty tribes wanted to make a trading spot where the nearby Maya civilization and Olmec civilization. They traded goods like jade, calenders, cowbell, Mud Puppy oil, mummy paper, Axolotls, lungfishes and much more. They were great traders by 90 BC, and the Maya reached their Classic period.

The empire reached its peak by 50 BC, due to successful imports and exports, beating the city-state of Catalonia and stealing Olmec food crops. Ancient Kittenolivia stretched across the entirety of Texas, even reaching the now nearby Inca empire in south America. The vast empire got new ideas, from the Inca and Nazca — fodging Bowie knives, Rambo knives, Ginsu knives and Deity Elections ― for weaponry. On the castle cortyards, invaders will find themselves raiding in a insead of the castle it surrounds!

So old.

In AD 9, the ancient Kittenolivian emperor[3] decied to make a flag and a great seal, based on what she saw.


At 50 BC, Ancient Kittenolivia stretched across the entirety of Texas, pulled a muscle, and limped all the way back again. Geography of Ancient Kittenolivia was like the Mayans farmland, suitible for growing tropical crops, but not kidneys or plecostomuses. Ancient Kittenolivians tried to fix broken eggs but they fail. Some came as far as Lake tahoe, and some Road kill.
The Ancient Kittenolivian crops were:

Popular Culture[edit]

Ancient Kittenolivians were skilled poets about Unhappy-land and Surtsey. Lindsay Lohan also made a flag and a poem about this great civilization. She used ivory for the flag, though. Because she thinks elephants come from Anatolia.[4] They invented the Ѻ symbol.[5]



  1. It rhymes. See also: Olmec.
  2. Evidence sponsored by jade.
  3. This emperor was called Lil' Lohan, maybe an ancestor of Lindsay Lohan of AD 1. In the Days of yore, she did a lite memo for her kittens.
  4. That's what she thinks.[citation needed]
  5. Its use has been shrouded in doubt for the last five minutes. Orginally it could be used to show an O with peircings, or maybe the mouth of a very hungry orphan. However Stewie Griffin have since decied that it now means a snake eating itself. Or Zá¦zẺX»½¼¾¿ÀÁzôÈ, or a part of Xenogears.
  6. Ms. beloved washed them. Thats why she's running.

See Also[edit]

 ( v · t · e ) 
History of Civilization

Ÿǿü čǽñ ħëłþ Ǜʼnçýċļöþęđĩä ßŷ ểǻŧıʼnġ ä çåŗǐβöǚ.