Portal:Games
Going back thousands of years through the anals of time, man's penchant for sport (pronounced spurt) is limitless and bounding. Competition has both raised the blood to passionate fervency and reconfirmed the eternal greatness of mankind throughout the centuries. Among the first sports was rungold, which consisted of one man standing at the top of a hill next to a huge boulder, and another man one hundred paces down. The first man would push the massive rock down the hill, and the object was that the second man had to "return it."
Another early sport was Sokur, an archaic game in which players would kick a round object with their feet with the object being to get the ball into either of two makeshift structures called "nets" (usually made out of tungsten weed, or spiderwebs). This game quickly fell out of favor when it was discovered that the object could be picked up with the hands, eventually leading to modern-day Rugby. (See more...)
The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game is one of Czechoslovakia's favorite American pastimes. In fact, it's Czechoslovakia's only American pastime, this is, however, completely irrelevant. The object of the game is quite simple, you must Keep Your Finger In The Box for as long as possible, or until your opponent removes his/her finger. You can do whatever else you want during this time, but your finger must remain in the box at all times. The first one to remove their finger from the box loses, and is from then on referred to as a loser for the rest of their Keep Your Finger In The Box Game career.
As far as can be determined, The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game has been around for many centuries. It is believed that the game was invented by Leonardo Da Vinci, sometime in the late 1400s. However, most people believe it was actually Sir Gareth Steadyfingers of Wye who originally came up with the idea. The game has not changed significantly over the centuries; the only major enhancement was the switch from wood to titanium in 1956. This switch came when it was announced that The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game was to be introduced to the United States, and therefore subject to increased gorilla activity. (See more...)
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- ... The Royal Pointless Military Things Tournament is an annual event hosted by the Elite General Blundering Around Division of the British armed forces. It is open to all pointless forces members, from those who are no good at fighting but can march very well, to the man in charge of feeding the regimental mascot sheep.
- ... You, a worthless nobody, have been summoned to a fighting tournament to fight and be given the chance to win whatever it is your heart desires, be it fame, glory, money, or swimming in a pool full of steaming hot spaghetti and tapioca.
- ... The Cardboard Box is the latest advancement in the field of tactical military equipment.
- The Birmingham Niggers are a professional American Minor League Baseball team from the windswept steppes of Birmingham, Alabama. Most news outlets consider the name offensive, and refuse to advertise any upcoming games or print any statistics for the team.
- ... In real football, the ball is held by the hands 95% of the time - regardless of what those damned Limeys say.
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