User:Jesus F Christ

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Sorry I'm a bit late.

“Crucifixion hurts less than not being able to edit a page on Uncyclopedia”

– Jesus F Christ on Crucifixion

Jesus F Christ is a desperate, degenerated, washed up, ex-Jesii with one hell of a Messiah complex on his hands.[1] Because of this Jesus F Christ has returned to give god another o and take back all the d evil is giving.

  • I am the Messiah.

Manifesto[edit | edit source]

Sympathy for the Cabal
Jagger F Christ

Jesus F Christ follows a strict fundamentalist view that Uncyclopedia should be both fun, and mental, with absolutely no amen getting in the way.

The following action is therefore recommended:

  • Remove semi-protection from virtually every mainspace page
  • Remove most of the user and IP blocks

He also recommends:

  • Giving bureaucrat and checkuser rights and to all community appointed administrators
  • Giving sysop rights to lots and lots of other users.
  • Patrolled edits.

I believe all of Uncyclopedia should do this.



Roadside Stew3 5 weeks ago
"Ccr kicks ass. And seriously could that guitar cable be any shorter!?"

Gavin Derifield2 2 weeks ago

"1969 im sure they was all short"

counternub405 2 days ago

"It's a wound cable, you'd be surprised how much give they have."

Quotes Jesus F Christ wishes Jesus F Christ had said, but didn't[edit | edit source]

– .Lyrithya 00:44, 9 March 2014 (UTC)
Jesus F Christ approves the above messages.
Jesus F Christ casts shame.


Pages Jesus F Christ would edit[edit | edit source]

Also...

UnNewsLast Edit
Deltarune tomorrow! by DaniPine321:22, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
UK Redefines Time Itself: Late Trains Now Officially On Schedule by Noopnurf11:15, 8 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Teacher admits entering hundreds of schoolboys by Billsheppard10:51, 7 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
SEGA to create M-Rated Sonic Game for 35th Anniversary by Neon was taken20:58, 6 February 2026 (hist) by Neon was taken
"COVID-23" said to spread throughout American airspace by Mr. George15:37, 6 February 2026 (hist) by Purplexed
Uncyclopedia Server narrowly escapes deportation in miraculous jailbreak by SystemPhantom18:49, 5 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
Windows 11 JBE hits shelves just in time for Christmas by DeletedUser51be906d01:51, 5 February 2026 (hist) by Gergdown
Texas schoolbook committee approves "Anybody Can Be President" series by Zim ulator23:33, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Alula
Ass raping monkeys made headlines in the White House  23:33, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Alula
Hamas stockpiling monkey penetrating ammunition by Zim ulator23:33, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Alula


MainLast Edit
Filial Piety by TKF00:30, 9 February 2026 (hist) by OrdinaryJoe1234
An image built one pixel at a time/Big by OPOSSUM00:25, 9 February 2026 (hist) by Soviet
An image built one pixel at a time by OPOSSUM00:09, 9 February 2026 (hist) by Alula
New Hampshire by Carlb00:07, 9 February 2026 (hist) by Alula
Winking Pooh Doll by DudeNamedElliot00:02, 9 February 2026 (hist) by Alula
Alabama by MadMax21:10, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Brogo13
A story built one word at a time by L10nM4st3r19:30, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
A story built two words at a time by മമ്മൂട്ടി18:54, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
Louisiana by MadMax17:49, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
Mr. Saturn by Mr Saturn16:54, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Mr Saturn
Aaron Rodgers  16:50, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
AStoryBuiltOneWordButNoSpacesAtATime by L10nM4st3r16:42, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
A story built one sentence at a time by Willy on wheels16:38, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
Thames Pirates  16:21, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Absolutely (TV series)  16:21, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
FlightGear by Deid216:21, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Post-grunge  16:05, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Catacomb 3-D by Mr Saturn15:29, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Mr Saturn
John Marshall by Soviet15:14, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Soviet
Download Now! CCTCGAGAATTTAACAAA  13:21, 8 February 2026 (hist) by Alula


Articles to fixLast Edit
Winking Pooh Doll by DudeNamedElliot00:02, 9 February 2026 (hist) by Alula

...and don't forget Special:NewPages .

References[edit | edit source]

  1. I hope that clears up any possible identification issues

See also[edit | edit source]