User:Jesus F Christ

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Sorry I'm a bit late.

“Crucifixion hurts less than not being able to edit a page on Uncyclopedia”

– Jesus F Christ on Crucifixion

Jesus F Christ is a desperate, degenerated, washed up, ex-Jesii with one hell of a Messiah complex on his hands.[1] Because of this Jesus F Christ has returned to give god another o and take back all the d evil is giving.

  • I am the Messiah.

Manifesto[edit | edit source]

Sympathy for the Cabal
Jagger F Christ

Jesus F Christ follows a strict fundamentalist view that Uncyclopedia should be both fun, and mental, with absolutely no amen getting in the way.

The following action is therefore recommended:

  • Remove semi-protection from virtually every mainspace page
  • Remove most of the user and IP blocks

He also recommends:

  • Giving bureaucrat and checkuser rights and to all community appointed administrators
  • Giving sysop rights to lots and lots of other users.
  • Patrolled edits.

I believe all of Uncyclopedia should do this.



Roadside Stew3 5 weeks ago
"Ccr kicks ass. And seriously could that guitar cable be any shorter!?"

Gavin Derifield2 2 weeks ago

"1969 im sure they was all short"

counternub405 2 days ago

"It's a wound cable, you'd be surprised how much give they have."

Quotes Jesus F Christ wishes Jesus F Christ had said, but didn't[edit | edit source]

– .Lyrithya 00:44, 9 March 2014 (UTC)
Jesus F Christ approves the above messages.
Jesus F Christ casts shame.


Pages Jesus F Christ would edit[edit | edit source]

Also...

UnNewsLast Edit
Man was dead and was not agreed  20:45, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
Trump still wants Greenland; Wall Street shits itself by Purplexed15:52, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Brogo13
Chris-chan's near birthday twin revealed by Sapplerx15:33, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Uncyclopedia Server narrowly escapes deportation in miraculous jailbreak by SystemPhantom03:57, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Noopnurf
Union City celebrated 250th anniversary of Marines by Greenpickles98702:56, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Gergdown
First Arab Gay Pride Festival held by Noof al Maadeed02:51, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Gergdown
Final Final Revelation added to the Qu'ran by Noof al Maadeed02:51, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Gergdown
SEGA to create M-Rated Sonic Game for 35th Anniversary by Neon was taken17:59, 2 February 2026 (hist) by Neon was taken
Recent UnNews Articles Using Unrelated Sources by Gammakid99917:12, 2 February 2026 (hist) by Gammakid999
Sports Page by SPIKE04:43, 2 February 2026 (hist) by Orangutang94


MainLast Edit
Cars 2 by Roza06:59, 4 February 2026 (hist) by SystemPhantom
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia by RubyPiec06:58, 4 February 2026 (hist) by DudeNamedElliot
A story built one word at a time by L10nM4st3r06:28, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Original Username
War Thunder by Tranvit06:24, 4 February 2026 (hist) by IS21
Winking Pooh Doll by DudeNamedElliot05:10, 4 February 2026 (hist) by DudeNamedElliot
Ryan Phillippe by DpEpsilon03:05, 4 February 2026 (hist) by DpEpsilon
Unaustralia  02:43, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Kalvay
Soap  01:56, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
Mr saturn by Mr Saturn01:23, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Biffy Clyro by Deemox00:55, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
An image built one pixel at a time/Big by OPOSSUM00:52, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
Wunk syndrome by ColonelKurtz00:36, 4 February 2026 (hist) by ColonelKurtz
A story built one sentence at a time by Willy on wheels00:26, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
An image built one pixel at a time by OPOSSUM00:14, 4 February 2026 (hist) by Fish on skates
Fate worse than death by Syu20 of the Who-dea00:07, 4 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Torture  00:04, 4 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Technical support  23:50, 3 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Brisbane City by Kalvay23:40, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Kalvay
Nanny state by Jimlemon23:40, 3 February 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Linux Kernel  23:32, 3 February 2026 (hist) by Alula


Articles to fixLast Edit

...and don't forget Special:NewPages .

References[edit | edit source]

  1. I hope that clears up any possible identification issues

See also[edit | edit source]