User:Jesus F Christ

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Sorry I'm a bit late.

“Crucifixion hurts less than not being able to edit a page on Uncyclopedia”

– Jesus F Christ on Crucifixion

Jesus F Christ is a desperate, degenerated, washed up, ex-Jesii with one hell of a Messiah complex on his hands.[1] Because of this Jesus F Christ has returned to give god another o and take back all the d evil is giving.

  • I am the Messiah.

Manifesto[edit | edit source]

Sympathy for the Cabal
Jagger F Christ

Jesus F Christ follows a strict fundamentalist view that Uncyclopedia should be both fun, and mental, with absolutely no amen getting in the way.

The following action is therefore recommended:

  • Remove semi-protection from virtually every mainspace page
  • Remove most of the user and IP blocks

He also recommends:

  • Giving bureaucrat and checkuser rights and to all community appointed administrators
  • Giving sysop rights to lots and lots of other users.
  • Patrolled edits.

I believe all of Uncyclopedia should do this.



Roadside Stew3 5 weeks ago
"Ccr kicks ass. And seriously could that guitar cable be any shorter!?"

Gavin Derifield2 2 weeks ago

"1969 im sure they was all short"

counternub405 2 days ago

"It's a wound cable, you'd be surprised how much give they have."

Quotes Jesus F Christ wishes Jesus F Christ had said, but didn't[edit | edit source]

– .Lyrithya 00:44, 9 March 2014 (UTC)
Jesus F Christ approves the above messages.
Jesus F Christ casts shame.


Pages Jesus F Christ would edit[edit | edit source]

Also...

UnNewsLast Edit
A dingo ate my baby by Turb0-Sunrise16:20, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
STOP THE PRESSES! ROCKIES WIN! by Somebetterusername12:42, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Turb0-Sunrise
'Was Gatsby really great?' asks ninth grader by PF4Eva12:09, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Christina Chandler announces her candidacy by RealLifeCartman09:03, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Fort Knox robbed, nothing to steal by Funnybony09:00, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Thanks for that F, Mr. Dumas by PF4Eva09:00, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Dark and gritty Flintstones reboot announced by PF4Eva08:59, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Buffalo Bills impulsively fire the wrong guy by Orangutang9405:17, 26 January 2026 (hist) by RealDonaldTrump
UnNews state-sponsoredly remembers Charlie Kirk by Somebetterusername05:17, 26 January 2026 (hist) by RealDonaldTrump
Worship leader Chris Brown filling in for mainstream Chris Brown, quite literally by Orangutang9405:16, 26 January 2026 (hist) by RealDonaldTrump


MainLast Edit
Uzbekistan by 67.124.61.21704:13, 27 January 2026 (hist) by RealDonaldTrump
A story built one word at a time by L10nM4st3r02:31, 27 January 2026 (hist) by ColonelKurtz
Sakuta Azusagawa by WGTT00:48, 27 January 2026 (hist) by WGTT
Gallifrey by WGTT00:46, 27 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
MrBeast by 97.138.97.9900:36, 27 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Tomodachi Life by Sapplerx00:29, 27 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Ubisoft by MK00:23, 27 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Osu! by Ziv00:12, 27 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Ed Sheeran by Sapplerx23:55, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Noopnurf
Sun by 129.49.78.13123:27, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
KAITO (Vocaloid) by Sapplerx23:25, 26 January 2026 (hist) by DaniPine3
Rascal Does Not Dream by WGTT23:19, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Alula
Charles Carroll of Carrollton by Deemox23:18, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Alula
Wake up by WGTT23:17, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Alula
Colour  23:14, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Alula
Fun  23:12, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Ri
Vocaloid by Sapplerx23:05, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
Piapro Family by Sapplerx23:05, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
IDubbbz by Sapplerx22:06, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Sapplerx
An article that is currently being made one character per edit by Acataua21:58, 26 January 2026 (hist) by Soviet


Articles to fixLast Edit

...and don't forget Special:NewPages .

References[edit | edit source]

  1. I hope that clears up any possible identification issues

See also[edit | edit source]