User:Frinko/South Park

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

“In Soviet Russia, Kenny kills YOU!!”

~ Russian Reversal on South Park

“Now this cartoon is for the likes of me. Thank you Viacom.”

~ Michael Jackson on South Park

“This is SOUTH PAAARRRRRRRRRK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

~ Leonidas on South Park

“If you had the chance to go back in time to stop Hitler, wouldn't you do it? I mean i personnally wouldn't because he was awesome.”

“ Scat humour, little boys...somebody up there likes me.”

~ Oscar Wilde on South Park

“mmmmmfl mflflflfl ffmm. Mmm flk”

~ Kenny on The fact he dies on every episode

“In Soviet Russia, Kenny killed YOU!”

~ Yakov Smirnoff on South Park

“Marklar is a marklar marklar about marklar.”

Made up Words on Marklar

“No Kitty, you are a bad kitty!”

~ Cartman on Mr Kitty

“RACE WAR!!!RACE WAR!!!”

~ Cartman on on a fight

“TIMMAH!”

~ Timmy on Timmy

“South Park mmmkay”

~ Mr. Mackey on south park

“You know, I can handle a kid eating their parents, people crapping out their mouths, and a kid who dies in a new way every episode, but making fun of scientology?! That was just over the top!”

~ Isaac Hayes on South Park

“Quiet Cartman, i need to concentrate.”

~ Kyle on Concentrating

“Well why dont you go to a concentration camp”

~ Eric Cartman on the above quote

“Oh i hope they dont whip me with those whips on the wall over there *points*”

~ Mel Gibson on Torture

“they slit a snuke in your snizz!”

~ Some Black Guy on Hilary Clinton's snatch

“I hear those kids' voices are done by a bunch of retarded midgets”

~ Bart Simpson on South Park

“Lets talk about comming out of the closet.”

~ Awkward Turtle on Gays

“I just love that warm, thin needle entering my eyeball.”

~ Trey Parker on Miami

“ When one little panda sticks his furry little willie in another panda's ear thats sexual harassment. And that makes me a sad panda.”

~ Sexual Harassment Panda on Sexual Harassment

“I dont like Kyle.”

~ Mel Gibson on Jews

“I poop my pants!”

~ Rod Stewart on South Park

“You know I learned something today, summing up the moral at the end of each episode is a great way to earn positive reviews from certain people.”

~ Stan Marsh on Learning something today

“ Dum.. Dum.. Dum... Dum..Dum ”

~ South Park on Joseph Smith

“ I'm not an R-tard ”

~ Randy on Life

“ South Park is the STUPIDEST and THE MOST GAY program on this plane!!!!!!!!!!!!”

~ 10gizem on South Park

Definition[edit | edit source]

This kid? Not funny enough for the show. Too gay.

Any park located south of the city centre can have the nickname South Park attached to it. South Parks are notable for being warmer in the northern hemisphere than in the southern hemisphere, due to the mean distribution of southness and northness.

Many so called 'South Parks' are in fact 'North Parks', due to a topological error in 1792 made by famous geologist Albert Murphy Sinbad Kanye Einstein.

eg. South Park, PA

Favorite Characters[edit | edit source]

  • Cartman : Anti-semite and fat-ass. Demands that people respect his authoritah. Had Butters' stick of butter in his mouth. Resembles Chris Farley at the age of 10.
  • Kyle : Token Jew. Kicks the baby.
  • Stan : The straight man.
  • Kenny : "Pfmmmmfmfpmf Fppmffmpppfffmmppmmmm mppmmmfmpfmm pfmppfppfpfm"GAY
  • Timmy : "TIMMAH!!"
  • Jimmy : T...T...To...ken cri... cri...ple #... #...2 (see Timmy). Comedian and member of the Cri... Cri... Cri..ps.
  • Butters : He's bicurious however under his friendly exterior lies his alter-ego Professor Chaos.GAY
  • Token: Only black kid in South Park. Also richest. Once watched porn. and he liked it.GAY
  • Tweek : Coffee addict who fears Underpants gnomes.
  • Pip: A completely useless character with the dumbest name ever. He fucked a pencil sharpener once.GAY
  • Mr./Mrs. Garrison : Oh SCISSOR ME TIMBERS! Teaches the children how the world really is; Filthy Sanchez, Hot Karl, etc. STRAIGHT then GAY, then STRAIGHT, then GAY again
  • Terrance : I farted hahahahahahahahahahaha.
  • Phillip : I farted too hahahahahahahahaha.
  • Randy : Stan's dad, and part time fagg amuser

Famous South Parks[edit | edit source]

Mr. Mrs. Mr. Garrison, another citizen of a South Park.

The most famous of all 'South Parks' is in Coyoteefields Texas, officially named Coyoteefields Texas Inner City Children's Playground and Green Area, where famous actor and one time MC John Frederick Kennedy was killed by a gum nut falling off the top of a large oak tree. Due to the fact that JFK was killed immediately after an illicit encounter with a female orangutan, a large scale CIA cover up was arranged by the people of Nashville, in which a dummy dressed like a hobo was shot in the head by a deranged lunatic, and then a couple of times more by deranged conspiracy theorizers to make sure.

Another famous South Park is located in Frankfurt, Germany. Named Lunkensburg after the famous Edward Lunken who owned a large castle on the site. The Lunken castle was razed to the ground by tax officials, who decided enough was enough and stepped in to stop Lunken's constant tax evasion. Lunken fled Germany and became a pirate on the pacific ocean, and is now renowned as a local hero in his town of birth.

A less significant south park, resides in the mountains of Colorado. Some unpopular animated children's television show was based in this town, but it sucked and lost all of its viewers to the amazingly popular the Teletubbies. Before being cancelled and all copies of its episodes sent to the planet of the apes, it was characterized by its well-researched, thought-provoking, unambivalent, and morally non-retarded take on the events of the day. Despite this handicap, it did receive an award for Best Children's Animated Series from the International Parents' Society in 1998.

If you live in a world where the fate of humans can be determined by a PSP game, little boys can die and come back each episode, and black people have jobs, you might be living in a South Park.

History[edit | edit source]

Due to Viacom's ownership of both Comedy Central and Nickelodeon, even the Box Ghost lives in South Park.

The origins of the term 'South Park' are now lost in the mist of time, however the term was introduced into popular culture in 1946 in the film Sparrowwalking, during which the actor Clint Eastwood exclaimed to his arch-nemesis EagleMan "Meet me in South Park at noon, sucker". The movie was grossly popular despite the fact that this was one of only two lines in the entire 3.5 hours of film, the other being EagleMan's reply "Yeah".


Screw you guys[edit | edit source]

I'm going home.

I Like Cheese Whiz

I lick Llamas

I lick yo Momma bitch!

Trivia[edit | edit source]

Steve Irwin stinging his heart out at Satan's Sweet 16 party.
  • Over 3 million dogs have admitted to taking a shit in South Park.
  • Neil Diamond originated the Autofellatio Competition in a freak accident at South Park. He was running backwards naked through a cornfield and the scarecrow from Jeepers Creepers broke his back, folding him in half.
  • Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman are TeH Ub3R PwnZ0R in World Of Warcraft.
  • Fans of the show enjoy that the show has moved beyond being just toilet humor and is now just Trey Parker's platform for espousing his Libertarian beliefs.
  • If you're not a bigot and immediately suspicious of Muslims, you are unpatriotic and will doom the United States to explode from the inside of Hillary Clinton's vagina.
  • Tom Cruise once attempted to use his evil powers to remove South Park from the planet, but failed after being encased in Carbonite by Oprah Winfrey.
  • There is no north to a South Park; it is all south. If you attempt to walk northwards, you will create a paradox and die.
  • As well you will die in a swirling paradox of death if you make any attempt at seeing anything in three dimensions.
  • George W. Bush watches South Park on Tivo, because it is aired past his bedtime.
  • If you watch the later episodes of South Park, you suddenly, unexpectedly, yet slightly arousingly grow giant nuclear hernias that are the most common known prey for young sloths.
  • Kenny has beaten Kramer in becoming the most racist person on earth.
  • Kenny is the only character in the show that wears a brown coat.
  • Cabbage was once featured twice in another show.
  • Connor Porterfield likes to have penis in his mouth
  • Sexual Harassment Panda had an abusive childhood.
  • Eric Cartman killed all the hippies in his basement by peeing in their bong.
  • The Pope does not, contrary to popular belief, live in the Vatican. He actually lives in South Park, Colorado, along with his posse of ultra-chic lesbian ninjas, P-Unit.
  • The Pope is Jewish!
  • I'm not an RTARD, you're an RTARD
  • Chokolate hotdog is one of the many ways to say poop in South Park.
  • You have now downloaded a virus, ur hardisk will soon be terminated.
  • Tom Cruise also once attempted to turn South Park into Hollywood, but a piece of shit made like Mickey Mouse came and delivered his magic across the land.
  • spare CHANGE!?
  • nearly 95% of the Planets population belive Stan and kyle are gay for each other and will endlessly try (and will fail) to prove this fact on Fanfiction.net
  • I just stole all your shit while you were reading this
  • Did you look?
  • This apple juice filled syring will give me super bad farts.
  • You are little whores-Bill, Phil, Jill, Dill Donahue oh who cares he is so evil. Thanks for killing him Jesus. I love you.

I'm totally[edit | edit source]

Super Cereal.

That's hawt.

People Who Have Made Sweet Love in South Park[edit | edit source]

South Park's bashing of supervillain Dick Cheney.
  1. Chef
  2. Satan
  3. Saddam Hussein
  4. Soviet Russia
  5. The chicken fucker lover
  6. J.F.K.
  7. Paris Hilton
  8. Eddie Murphy
  9. Cartman's Mom

“It's nice.”

~ Borat on Cartman's mom's vagina
  1. Britney Spears
  2. The fat, annoying guy from "Friends"
  3. Your neighbor with that annoying dog
  4. The Pope
  5. KoRn (the band, not the food)
  6. The Chicken Puncher
  7. The entire population of Wyoming
  8. Iron Chef Chen Kenichi
  9. Man-bear-pig (50% Man, 50% Bear and 50% Pig) - the super serial creation of Al Gore so he could have some attention. Excelsior!
  10. Mr. Mrs. Garrison
  11. Sexual Harassment Panda
  12. Ms. Chokesondick
  13. The 1989 Denver Broncos
  14. Peter Griffin
  15. Biggie Smalls
  16. Barbara Streisand
  17. David Hasselhoff
  18. Envy from Fullmetal Alchemist
  19. 26.33% of Bob Saget (he brought all the lame)
  20. Towelie
  21. Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
  22. Tommy Lee
  23. Optimus Prime
  24. Timmy
  25. Jimmy
  26. Nut Gobbler
  27. Doritos and Yogurt... yummmm! :D
  28. Cartman's mom who did it with the entire country. Excluding you
  29. Corey Feldman.
  30. james
  31. Chuck Norris
  32. Larry the Cable Guy
  33. Space Ghost (or so he CLAIMS anyway)
  34. The Guy Who Stole Your Lunch In 3rd Grade
  35. Marilyn Manson
  36. mana
  37. your cat
  38. Cartman and Butters
  39. Weird Al
  40. Travis Barker
  41. Travis Shettel
  42. Michael Jackson
  43. Stephen's Johnson
  44. Mitchell Chesney
  45. Joe Walker
  46. Tom Fulp
  47. You
  48. Richard Dorkins
  49. Richard Dawkins

Some Reasons Why People Hate South Park[edit | edit source]

1. People find out that the creators are just self-hating-closet Jews, so they figure being political through cartoons make them feel empowered. 2. People who hate SP for the sport of it suck hairy dick.

Links[edit | edit source]

huh?

See Also:[edit | edit source]

Part of a series of articles on
Scientology
Tomcruiseanimated.gif

Beliefs
Space Opera
Xenu
Thetans
Clear
The Sacred Movements
of Goa Tse

Concepts and Practices
The Force
Hodgepodge (the hidden truth)
Kitten Huffing

People
L. Ron Hubbard
Tom Cruise
Lestat de Lioncourt
Chef
Will Smith
Captain Caveman
That Creepy Scientologist
"Charity" Fund Collector Guy

Enemies
You· Me · Oprah
South Park· YTMND · 4chan
The Holiday Hawk
Appliantology
Walken!· Rick Astley · Pacman
Horses· Italians · Anonymous

Tomcruiseship.png