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Thursday, November 28, 2024, 23:37 (UTC) How to Write UnNews • Random Article • UnNews Archives

Valet: Accused UBS bank trader sorry beyond recollection A fancy-ass melanin-challenged bank trader accused of fraud in connection with a $2.3 billion loss in unauthorized trading reported by Swiss giant UBS is “sorry beyond recollection,” his Valet said Thursday, because now he cannot remember where he stashed the money. Full story»		Latest news  KKK grand wizard woke up from a terrible dream last night President pardons Princess Peach and Blossom Bitchless men and pick me girls are now saying "your body my rules" in order to ... Project 2025 delayed, causing riots Epstein pal President-elect Trump picks sex trafficking pedophile Matt Gaetz as ... Trump picks Led Zeppelin to lead EPA 10-year old math prodigy just realized Santa can't eat all those cookies Obama smears poop on day care Countries Unveil Breakfast Cereal Plan Leopards finally getting ready to eat people's faces next year Kardashian, Aniston endorse bestiality OH MY GOD WHAT THE FREAK Trump just won, so here's a special HowTo about dealing with the hard times that... Biden wins 2024 election NFL player Sam Darnold emerges from election anarchy, crowned GEQBUS Kamala Harris Defeats Donald Trump, Becomes 47th President of USA 2024 U.S. election cancelled, anarchy inevitable Peanut the Squirrel swatted, killed for "illegal guns and drugs" New Drug Craze in Schools "Planing" Peter gets dementia to stop stupid cutaways on next week's Family Guy » Older news
Jack Layton passes away, even separatist Quebecers mourn Mr. Jack Layton passed away today while fighting 300 CIA agents, destroying most of them, drawing sympathy from an unlikely part of the country: The United States of Quebec. Full story»	Uncyclopedia says it’s losing contributors The online knee-jerk spoofopedia that is written entirely by quadriplegics, iSexuals, biSexuals, trySexuals, perverts, degenerates, tardy school children, farm animals, kindergarten teachers, Wikipedia rejects, peg-legged whalers, washed up 1st graders, and a few bearded-ladies (plus a honey or 2), is losing contributors Full story»
People overweight, and it's their fault, at all time low “If the additional fat is a product of modern society, you should not be given Diabetes by some facist doctor,” Full story»	Gerard Depardieu first recipient of the Legion de Pisser A panel of French cultural experts have applauded Depardieu's decision to pull out his penis in the economy class and now want to pin a medal of the Legion de Pisser on Depardieu's Saucisse Francais. Full story»
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Write an article! Simply enter the headline in the box below and click the button to create your own UnNews article! Guide to UnNews	Minitrue ± What's This? Seventh Day Adventists arrive one day early Tony Curtis family put Snail and Oyster farm up for sale Madonna bequeaths her veins to lute stringing company Christians murder 50 in USA multi city spree today-Muslim world appalled Iranian railways running on Axles of Evil says Palin	Recent UnNews Audio ± Podcast | Archive. 11 Sep: Korans may have been burned today (2:53, 1.99 Mb, info) • story 8 Sep: Bush to be stripped of Heisman trophy (2:29, 1.71 Mb, info) • story 7 Sep: US briefly takes lead in war of religious insults (3:03, 2.09 Mb, info) • story 5 Sep: Jimbo Wales hopes to cash in on micro-commerce (3:15, 2.24 Mb, info) • story {{{18}}} ({{{19}}}, info) • [[{{{20}}}|story]] [[Media:{{{21}}}|{{{22}}}]] ({{{23}}}, [[:Image:{{{21}}}|info]]) • [[{{{24}}}|story]]
About UnNews An Uncyclomedia project UnNews is a service of Uncyclopedia that spreads misinformation and cons the public into swallowing it hook-line-and-sinker (and worm), by guilefully making it resemble authentic news articles. UnNews stories use satire to ensure the most unfair and biased reporting possible.	This day in news... 28 November 2013: Sean Connery confirmed to host Jeopardy! 28 November 2012: Roman Empire considers regulation of barbarian armies 28 November 2010: 5 rare pink elephants found dead in Indonesia 28 November 2009: City of Toulon not liable in rhino crushing mishap 28 November 2008: YouTube changes aspect ratio to 2.35:1, users pissed 28 November 2007: Russian man blows self up after train inspectors notice porn magazines 28 November 2006: Some guy dies somewhere.	UnFunnies for November 28
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