Savethemooses di... I mean, "went on vacation". Yeah. Um, I don't know when he'll be back. Just go to bed.
His Excellency Sysop for Life Field Admin Sir Dr. Savethemooses, GUN, CUN, OUN, King of Mediocre Britain Lord of All the Noobs of the Earth and IP Addresses of the Sea and Conqueror of the Interweb Empire in Wikia in General and Uncyclopedia in Particular.
Today's Featured Article
The Wall Street Crash of 1929 was the stock-market crash that occurred in October 1929 and caused the eventual complete collapse of the American economy. This led to many opportunities for great photography of homeless people and farmers covered in dust the following years. It began on Black Thursday, October 24, and ended on Black Tuesday, October 29, when prices in the New York Stock Exchange (NYSE) collapsed. The names of these days remain the same despite the African American community being cleared of all accusations of causing the crash.
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Recently featured: J.D. Salinger|iPod yocto|Pot v. Kettle
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More of the best of Uncyclopedia
Although I do not have Photoshop nor do I have elite image editing skills, I've managed to churn out a few OK pictures in my time. Here are a few of them:
In the Moosenews
- STM Completes the Trifecta: With the featuring of an image from Pontius Pilot, Savethemooses has entered an elite group. He has now had a Featured Article, Featured Image, and has won Writer of the Month in his career. Only Radical Z and Cap'n Ben can claim the same.
- After much begging from his millions of groupies, Savethemooses has updated his moose news.
- Katie has been selected Moose Fan of the Month. Congratulations!
- Savethemooses was arrested yesterday on charges of being too good-looking. He was quoted as saying, "Guilty as charged, ladies!" He then winked.
- Kansas has adopted the moose as its state animal. New biology education standards now qualify bison as moose.
- According to a very credible and non-facetious source, Savethemooses farted out the universe. Kansas education standards have adjusted accordingly.
- Savethemooses has been arrested for making too many Kansas jokes in succession. He was quoted as saying, "Call me!"
More Current Events at MooseNews
Did you know...
From Mooselopedia's moose experts:
- ... that my mother was Jehovah's Witness and my father was atheist, so now I knock on people's doors and say "never mind"?
- ... that you can chat Savethemooses up on IRC if he likes you enough?
- ... that mooses have 27 chromosomes, compared to the 23 that humans have?
- ... that the usual pace is a shambling trot, but when pressed mooses can break into a gallop?
- ... that the female moose is reported to kill more people in Canada than any other animal?
- ... that mooses enjoy eating small human babies?
- ... that mooses actually do have Canadian accents?
- ... that robots and mooses battled long ago in the Moose-Robot War of 1820?
- ... that the singular form of mooses is cat?
(Bold text denotes a featured article)
Pot v. Kettle - Mediocre Britain - Spanish Inquisition (TV show) - Seven Deadly Sins - Teletubbies - Phonics - Open-Heart Surgery for Dummies - Lord Byron - Kool Aid - World War I (video game) - iPod yocto - J.D. Salinger - Z - Wall Street Crash of 1929 - Pontius Pilot - HowTo:Smell a Bit Like Fish - Slate industry in Wales - Innovations in Comedy - Self-toasting bread - Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers - I don't appreciate your attitude towards my potato chip situation - Cliché - Winslet fatalism - Quaid Disaster Theorem - IRC Wars (video game) - Poopenheimer Mainframe Mk XII Computer - O'Possums - Dublin Drunken Popes - Door knob - Kitten-related human fatalities - Chunky Water - Pocahontas - That one movie - Opiate of the Molasses - Pants Vaporizer - Invasion of Grenada (video game) - Zsa Zsa Gabor - Cubic Missile Crisis
STM's Unvestigative Journalism
Nigerian census finds millions of rich, desperate princes - Last spot in heaven taken; hundreds waitlisted - Bro-on-bro taser violence reaches all-time high - Applebee's takes a hit after ill-timed "Spinach Sensations" menu - Jack Abramoff admits to taking money from Jack Abramoff - Chertoff slow in reaction to Mardi Gras - Mad Cow found in U.S.; "Oh fuck!" exclaim citizens - Media outlets receive chilling hurricane threat tape
STM's Literary Works
Writer of the Month
For the 394th straight month, Savethemooses has been named the Mooselopedia Writer of This Month. Savethemooses is by far the funniest person of all time. He has written many articles, all of them hilarious, and has also contributed small parts to at least one million other articles. We look forward to more of his great work.
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