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Edward Christopher "Ed" [insert singular 3rd person subjective pronoun]eran (born 17 February 1991 - died NEVER) is a Canadian-British singer-songwriter, actor, owner of a bar in London, and Rupert Grint lookalike. He is also known as "Teddy" on Instagram. Additionally, he is considered to be the "one true god" of his home country, and even the entire world. Asides from that, he's known to the public as the "Ginger Jesus". Ed is arguably a fad of the year 2017 and also a British nationalist. Even though his career was meant to fade away at the end of the 2010s, he manages to still make music to this day, much to everyone's annoyances. He is known to have a lot of chart hits, especially in the UK, including "The B Team", "Untitled (Take Me Into Your Loving Arms)", "Nothing Happens After Two" and most infamously, "I'm Back & I'm Desperate". However, they are most likely plagiarized, but he still gets away with it. His private life isn't very well known, thanks to having no surveillance cameras in his home and the fact that the address to it is changed every day. Despite having a male given name, Ed somehow manages to have female pronouns as part of his surname, so, logically, he would've instantly became a "she" right away. Oh fuck, how do we go by them again? (Full article...) Recently featured: John Marshall You Rob Gronkowski Kirkification Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... ... that solar flares are actually maritime distress signals launched by astronauts floating in the Sun's vast oceans? (Pictured) ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives? ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that the The Antipodean Gallery of Post-Modern Art will play host to some of Pau Pei's most groundbreaking works of concentric art? (Pictured) ... that you've just lost the game? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... You can do anything with creativity, determination, and the exploitation of the working class? ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?" ... that the bird is equal to or greater than the word? ... that in Baltimore, Maryland, it is a violation of statute to dress up as a clown and to make fun balloon animals to give to children and molest them with? ... that solar flares are actually maritime distress signals launched by astronauts floating in the Sun's vast oceans? (Pictured) ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives? ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that the The Antipodean Gallery of Post-Modern Art will play host to some of Pau Pei's most groundbreaking works of concentric art? (Pictured) ... that you've just lost the game? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... You can do anything with creativity, determination, and the exploitation of the working class? ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?" ... that the bird is equal to or greater than the word? ... that in Baltimore, Maryland, it is a violation of statute to dress up as a clown and to make fun balloon animals to give to children and molest them with? ... that solar flares are actually maritime distress signals launched by astronauts floating in the Sun's vast oceans? (Pictured) ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives? ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that the The Antipodean Gallery of Post-Modern Art will play host to some of Pau Pei's most groundbreaking works of concentric art? (Pictured) ... that you've just lost the game? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... You can do anything with creativity, determination, and the exploitation of the working class? ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?" ... that the bird is equal to or greater than the word? ... that in Baltimore, Maryland, it is a violation of statute to dress up as a clown and to make fun balloon animals to give to children and molest them with? ... that solar flares are actually maritime distress signals launched by astronauts floating in the Sun's vast oceans? (Pictured) ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives? ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior?	In the news 1977-2026 So.. about that Super Bowl.. Bad Bunny and TPUSA offer equally heathen, equally crappy halftime shows GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL!! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Buffalo Bills owner Terry Pegula proven to be clueless, fires the wrong guy Denver Broncos quarterback Bo Nix accidentally curses himself in playoff win Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • ICE-y chaos in Minnesota • Fallout from the Epstein Files • Winter Olympics • Seattle flooding the streets with Starbucks coffee to celebrate the Seahawks' win • New England Patriots fans hiding in a corner after being exposed • r/TheDarnold having a MASSIVE field day Recent deaths: Kianna Underwood • Uncyclopedia • Catherine O'Hara • Lamont • Brad Arnold • NFL season • New England Patriots fans' insufferability, for now • Lindsay Vonn's leg • Some kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny title • James Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) (Pictured) • Robert Duvall Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek) • Quinton Reviews Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Weed • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • Dancin' Maduro • Aaron Rodgers' career • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files (cough cough Bill and Hillary Clinton) • Travis Kelce • the US government, again On this day... February 17: Sheeranist New Year (United Kingdom) 1991 - Famed British musician Ed Sheeran is born. Brits rejoice that their Messiah is finally with them. 1996 - Gary Kasparov loses a game of chess to a computer, like that's never happened to anyone before. 2008 - USA bombs some country after the military finds a few extra bombs hiding in an old pair of pants. 2017 - Denmark is officially recognized as a mistake and erased from history. 2026 - You finally forget about your miserable Valentine's Day, only to be tormented by this reminder.
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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