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LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA -- On Tuesday, the Los Angeles City Council voted no on a $5 million proposal that would have funded eighty new affordable housing units and transitional housing beds. According to an official statement by city officials: "We don't give a shit." The housing effort comes as twenty more units already in the pipeline are cancelled. According to the Give-a-Shit report assembled and presented by Sunday Papers Podcast (a weekly news program that breaks down supposedly-important news stories and adds context) there was a ten-fold increase in We-Don't-Give-a-Shits from 2018 to 2019, with a total of 240 units not receiving building permits. "It's as if the city government doesn't give a shit," says host Greg Fitzsimmons. (Full article...) Recently featured: UnNews:NASA bamboozled as North Star disappears Mario Kart Presidential Wrestling Classic HowTo:Eat an orange Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... *... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores?	In the news "BOMBOCLAAAAAT!" Russian AI powered humanoid robot faceplants on stage in front of crowd Syrian National Museum gets robbed of six to seven Roman statues Cloudy windy Hurricane Melissa hits da Jamaica, mon! (Pictured) United Kingdom sends Royal Airforce “specialists” to Belgium to fight Russian drones “invading” airports A new candidate enters the upcoming 2028 presidential race US government shitdown inundates over 1000 flights with shit Democrats finally cave and end the shitdown New York City goes full Commie, elects Zohran Mamdani as mayor Los Angeles Dodgers win World Series with lucky bullshit, become the Kansas City Chiefs of baseball Dingo eats a woman's baby Interview: A Brief Chat About Uncyclopedia with Uncyclopedian and Lucky star. Indy police: former NFL quarterback Mark Sanchez literally butt-fumbles in real life Trump receives COVID vaccine despite supporters making their entire personalities being against it for years The US government shits itself Starmer unveils new digital ID cards to help further monitor citizens' pornography intake BoJo and Co. politely ask Nigel Farage to stop lifting children Omaha man's order of salmon sliders indistinguishable from salmon burgers Charlie Kirk gets l+ratio'd during a speech in Utah Sheeranism officially legalised in Yankeeland Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Pregnant moms taking Tylenol to give their babies "autism powers" • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Republicans and rich people fleeing NYC Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • the guitarist and a security guard from KISS • June Lockhart • Nick Mangold • Jamaica, at the hands of Hurricane Melissa • Toronto Blue Jays' World Series dreams • Donna Godchaux • Diane Ladd • Dick Cheney • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya Nakadai • Sally Kirkland • the penny Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song Contest • DEI • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBC • Donald Trump • Aforementioned Tylenol moms • Mark Butt-fumble's career • Coral reefs • The economy of Capitalism in NYC • Bills Mafia's livers and kidneys after losing horribly to the Miami Dolphins • Weed • Stranger Things On this day... November 14: Brobdingnagian Day, Jokes That Only Work in Albanian Day (Albania) 1337 - People first come up with the idea of substituting letters with numbers which l00k s1m1lar. Blind people using text-to-speech programs rue the day. 1922 - The British Broadcasting Corporation begins their first radio broadcast, instructing listeners how to feed the tiny man inside their radios. 1933 - King Kong climbs, humps Statue of Liberty, who sues the simian for sexual harassment. 1998 - Dennis Rodman and Carmen Electra marry in Las Vegas, marking the beginning of the ugly bride marries hot bride craze. 2003 - The Dwarf planet Sedna is discovered by astronomers, but back then they call it a "little midget" planet, before we knew better. 2022 - World switches to Metric time. Women with hourglass figures lose value.
Featured picture The Lego JFK Assassination Set was the top selling toy of 1963. Collectors have been known to pay up to twenty-seven dollars on eBay. Image credit: Sliferjam View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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