User:Zombiebaron/Uncyclopedia Reskin Committee/Halloween2020

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From today's featured article

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Euromoloch: A website giving away free human slaves to sacrifice to the glory of Moloch in return for

a) money
b) reffering freinds to do the same

Did you know...

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  • ...that through the glory of Moloch we are all invincible?
  • ...that Moloch feasts upon the strong and the weak alike because variety is the spice of death?
  • ...thou shalt let thy seed pass through the fire to Moloch?
  • ...Moloch orders from the kids' menu?
  • ...everyone who worships Moloch has power over regular administrators and the ability to deop them and destroy them afterwards if they oppose the cabal and Moloch? (Pictured)
  • ...by the blessing of Moloch we shall sadistically destroy and sacrifice unsuspecting contributors which oppose the cabal and their agenda?
  • ...disciples of Moloch have the power of untouchability, which means that they cannot be defamed at all, and those who defame them are destroyed?

In the news

Moloch celebrates the season of sacrifice
Moloch celebrates the Season of Sacrifice
  • The 2020 Season of Sacrifice Festival was the largest in recent history, with mass graves all over the world for the glory of Moloch. (Pictured)
  • Moloch announced his next film role: Meet The Molochs, co-starring Ben Stiller and the reanimated corpse of Jerry Stiller.
  • Moloch projected to win all medals at Tokyo Olympics, says loyal Russian judge.

On this day

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  • 4311 B.C.E. - The first non-profit, Feed Me Children, is established by Moloch.
  • 1334 B.C.E. - Moloch devours the Canaanites for their insolence.
  • 1472 A.D. - Moloch eats a human soul sandwich with a side of French fries
  • 1729 A.D. - Jonathan Swift modestly proposes the Irish feed their children to Moloch. The Irish refuse. Moloch punishes the Irish with a famine a century later.
  • 1960 A.D. - Glorious Moloch changes his political affiliation to Republican in support of Richard Nixon. (Pictured)

Picture of the day

Alan Moore Summons Moloch
Alan Moore, world renowned graphic novel and comics author, attributes his successful career to a steady regime of sacrificing his vomit to Moloch. Several times a day Alan Moore vomits into a large vomit bucket, and then Tuesday evenings he sacrifices his vomit to Moloch in exchange for ideas. Alan says that Moloch likes the vomit best after he's eaten several tuna fish sandwiches.

Image credit: Nicolassequeira
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Other areas of the Temple

Sister temples

The Temple of Moloch is hosted by the Moloch Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other Moloch projects as well as some foreign language houses of worship to various deities.

Tower of Babel

This Temple of Moloch is written in Phoenician, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 37,446 articles. Many other Moloch wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.