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Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Deinonychus Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Troodon Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus Brachiosaurus

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The Buffalo Bills are a "professional" football "team". Their home is in Buffalo, New York. They are widely regarded as one of the most successful NFL franchises to exist ever. Their only championships where in 1964 and 1965 when they won two AFL titles. However, the Bills have not won any championships since the AFL–NFL merger, a move that many now consider "a huge fuck up". They were owned by a 93-year-old zombie man who refused to die named Ralph Wilson. In 2014 Wilson finally kicked the bucket, fucking zombie! Buffalo Sabres owner, oil fracker, and resident idiot Terry Pegula bought the team.

The Buffalo Bills are named after Buffalo Bill, a friendly man who lived in the woods all by himself. He would have guests over frequently where they would stay in a well he constructed in his home. They would stay for several days putting lotion on their skin. Bill then proceeded to skin them alive and wear their skin. The founders of the Bills felt this sort of behavior was admirable.(Full article...)

Did you know...

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  • ... that AMC's hit series Breaking Bad Wind (Pictured) featured the actors' real farts?
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  • ... that tickle fights are a common occurrence in soccer? (Pictured)
  • ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
  • ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
  • ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?"
  • ... there's a ninja behind you but it left when you turned around?
  • ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?
  • ... that the dolphin is the only animal other than man that laughs at its own farts?
  • ... that half of all American schoolchildren graduate in the bottom 50% of their class?
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  • ... that you should invest in chicken stock?
  • ... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
  • ... that the White House is really off-white?
  • ... that Afghanistan is known for its lush dirt farms, where dirt and dust are cultivated by villagers to enhance the scenic emptiness for which the region is known?
  • ... that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
  • ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
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  • ... that I get knocked down, but I get up again, and you're never gonna keep me down?
  • ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise?
  • ... that sheep shrink when it rains?
  • ... that if the earth were the size of an apple, we would fall off?
  • ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
  • ... that Obama's last name is [REDACTED]?
  • ... that every single day, we breathe enough air to continue living?
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  • ... that the universe is made up of protons, electrons, neutrons and morons?
  • ... that you've just lost the game?
  • ... that the keyboard you have been using has more germs than your toilet seat?
  • ... that torture is better to give than to receive?
  • ... that no word in the English language rhymes with the word flucumber?
  • ... that the comic strip Fred Basset is interesting but not in the sense that might be expected of a comic strip?
  • ... that air is a fictional substance that was once believed to fill the space above the surface of the Earth? While this "air theory" was once used to explain various phenomena, air theory, at last refuted, has joined the gene, the atom, Antarctica, and the free lunch in a long list of scientific red herrings.
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  • ... that you just lost the Game?
  • ... that Boston Bruins goaltender Gerry Cheevers was one of the most feared hockey players in the so-called "stick to the groin" era?
  • ... that in order to complete the video game World of Warcraft, over one cubic mile of animals must be clicked?
  • ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else?
  • ... that under Communism, everyone gets a C?
  • ... that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man? Withdrawal symptoms include nausea, hallucinations and possibly death?
  • ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
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In the news

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Chuck Norris didn't die, Death got Chuck Norris'd.

Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein FilesWar Special Combat Operation in Iran • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed • March Madness Elite Eight

Recent deaths: Robert Mueller • Transgender self-identity in India • Mr. StricklandC.B. Buckner's carreer as an MLB ump • Duke's basketball season

Upcoming deaths: IranMahmoud AhmadinejadAtlanta Falcons • Streetsigns with Cesar Chavez's name • SoraTiger Woods' driver's license and career.. fuck it, his life can go too

On this day...

Bass? Aoobs?

March 30: International Cleavage Day

  • 13B BC - God creates the Milky Way after squeezing stellar matter out of her insanely big knockers.
  • 1692 - Twelve women are burned at the stake for inciting men to sin with their exposed bra straps.
  • 1867 - America buys Alaska from the Russians because of its stiff Mountain peaks and vast tracts of fertile land.
  • 1945 - Woman wears clothing that shows cleavage. The husband beats her.
  • 1950 - The first film in Indonesia gets released, known for having at least one uncensored boob scene.
  • 1977 - Marvel Comics designs a bra with a nipple window, claims its a proud Kryptonian tradition.
  • 2012 - Big butts are now in! But you still can't be more than 120 pounds. Hey, I don't make the rules.

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Today's featured picture

Hello Kitty
Hello Kitty getting her groove on.

Image credit: IMBJR
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Recent Articles

More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push | Great ideas

Writer and Noob of the Month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Clock is ticking! There's only one more day to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

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