Talk:Allah's True Prophet Muhammad

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If you have come here to complain about Uncyclopedia taking the piss out of your religion, go and read Atheism (religion).

We are proud of the fact that we insult everyone equally...

This is the talk page for discussing improvements to Allah's True Prophet Muhammad.
This is also a forum for spreading libelous rumors about the article's subject.
This is not a forum for general discussion about what you did last night. We have the Village Dump for things like that.

Article policies

Comments[edit source]

I want more funny quotes!

FINALLY SOMEONE WHO ISNT AFRAID TO STAND UP TO THOSE ALLAH DAM MUSLIMS!!

This article is awesome.

I want to take a different stand.

I don't mind Muhammad's image on this page, and I like the picture of Muslims protesting this article, or the fatwa for saving the image.... but, goat effing jokes ? Gay images ?

It's not funny anymore.

We need more satire, not downright dislike. The girl with the boobs is a good example of what we need.

Hey what would you write about Christianity if you had the chance, what do you think about Christians. Come on, you say that nothing is impossible for God, but because he is a spirit he cannot impregnate a women so that she can give birth to himself (God) but as the Son of God. Common nothing is impossible for God and this is what he did.

Mohammad came along 600 years or so after Christ, was not a first hand witness to the events that he preached about (concerning Jesus), but yet he claimed that Jesus did not die on the cross, Common. He also claimed that he rose to Heaven. How do we prove this, what he slept and had a dream about rising to heaven while his wife looked over his body. How do we know that he rose to heaven, blind faith User:User:User:Merbabuuuu 06:51, 10 March 2008 (UTC) ~

Please dont humiliate any religion and dont ever try to humiliate ALMIGHTY ALLAH, His Messengers and HIS Holy Book True...and the level of idiocy.

The amount of hate in this article is amazing. There's a big difference between funny and hatefully stupid.

Stupid idiot, stop mocking our prophet!– Preceding unsigned comment added by 218.111.5.83 (talk • contribs)

)
This is a spoof encyclopedia.....you'll find a great number of things are treated in a less than reverent way. If it bothers you, go somewhere else. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Seriously, get over it. I mock Jesus all the time, so you can get used to it. Sorry for disgrasing your Islam, but still, it's not that big of a deal.--★★★Joe★★★ 00:42, 5 February 2006 (UTC)
Infidel how dare you write funny articles on Jesus! We Christians are so upset, that we are willing to give up our Bingo games and call for a new Inquisition or Crusades or something. That is if we all can agree on it or something. I lost count, now what were we doing? B-13, Bingo! I got a Bingo! I just won the jackpot of $25USD, woo hoo! Now what was I saying? --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 02:29, 26 February 2006 (UTC)

No one cares about your imaginary god.– Preceding unsigned comment added by 68.60.184.228 (talk • contribs)

Technically Jahve, the father of Jesus and Allah are the same west- semitian monotheistic God in three different versions. So this bloke just pissed on Allah. --Suresh simple.png Swami A. Suresh 06:31, 7 February 2006 (UTC) INFIDELS!!! WES GUNNA BOMB j00!!!!!!11!!11!!1one!!--85.100.109.48 10:26, 7 April 2007 (UTC)

Is pissing on deities forbidden or something? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Only if they exist--Mrasdfghjkl 04:34, 8 February 2006 (UTC)
I guess pissing on Allah is forbidden if you are a muslim. More literally though, I guess you piss on The Almighty everyday, since he is omnipresent--Suresh simple.png Swami A. Suresh 19:31, 8 February 2006 (UTC)
Well I'll be damned.--Mrasdfghjkl 03:11, 9 February 2006 (UTC)
Yes, I'm afraid so. Strong Rad 20:00, 9 February 2006 (UTC)
My, what a paradox. --POJoe!Ireland.jpgTALKCONTRIBSF@H 21:55, 9 February 2006 (UTC)
Meh, what a paradox.--Mrasdfghjkl 04:57, 10 February 2006 (UTC)
It can work, If you have a huge bladder!--Suresh simple.png Swami A. Suresh 04:27, 13 February 2006 (UTC)
Yiiikes!--Mrasdfghjkl 01:08, 15 February 2006 (UTC)
Did you know that in Soviet Russia, Allah pisses on you? Da, Comrade, it is true. You say Jyhad, and I say Jihad, Jyhad, Jihad, Tomato, Tomoto, let's call the whole Holy War off! After all Allah must have a sense of humor, or else he would have turned Uncyclopedia into a pillar of salt or something worse a long time ago. Ah well, God loves me best anyway, which is why he allows me to hear voices and stuff. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 02:23, 26 February 2006 (UTC)
Yiiiiiikes!--Mrasdfghjkl 05:19, 6 March 2006 (UTC)

"Mohammed

Mohammahammed

Mohammahammahed

Mohammahammahammahed

Stop! Mohammer time". – Preceding unsigned comment added by Kenesis (talk • contribs) ROFL!!!!! so funny!– Preceding unsigned comment added by Kenesis (talk • contribs)

hmm... Jack Chick's lawyer is pretty particular about his copyrights. If you doubt it, try looking up some of your favorite Chick parodies from more than a year ago. 207.188.29.244 19:40, 28 March 2006 (UTC)

Passing by[edit source]

I don't think that making fun of any thing that is holy is right. You should NOT make fun of Jesus, Mohammad, Allah, the Holy Ghost or anything that relates to them. What if, when you die, you get into the after life and you'll be questioned over what you did in your life, thus whoever you are making fun of, it is counted as a sin, and not any sin it is some of the sins that may throw you in hell for an eternity. I mean, are you in any way better than anything that is holy? Of course not! God is always alive and watching us and providing us with whatever we need, and if we even so much as try and count his deads and favours that are granted to us each and every day we will surely fail. Then, why with all this kindness he granted us, we repay with bitterness and denail? we see whatever we want to see, but we are not seeing the big picture. God is patien over whatever we repay him with, but be aware my friends, that whatever we do, we will not escape Judgement day, and our lives will be re-played in front of our eyes discussing and assessing each and every thing we ever said, did or thought being as pittiful or significant as it may be. life is not only about life today, it is actually about life in the after-life, because this life is the gaining or losing in the deeds scale and in death we will see how well we did, and what faith is the right path. So are you on the right path? What makes you so sure? DID you actually fully read the other faiths to know better? Do you have all the answers that are bothering you in your current faith? I really encourage you to read about other faiths and be objective, not make fun of Christianity, Jeudism, or Allah Islame. I did.... I was on a split road for a short while, but thank God, I think I got the right path at last.– Preceding unsigned comment added by 212.138.47.17 (talk • contribs)

Why should religion be held higher than everything else? Because it can be interpreted, it's as much a device of humans as government and light bulbs. Not that it matters anyway. I don't believe in your god or any other god. I reserve my right to make fun of religions, you, and your poopyheaded ilk.--Shrooms.jpgShroom!.gifGay2.gifSir Flammable KUN Prince%21.gif (Na Naaaaa...)Gay2.gifShroom!.gifShroomirror.jpg 20:21, 12 April 2006 (UTC)
You need to grow a head and put a brain in it, Mr./Ms. 212.138.47.17--Mrasdfghjkl 08:01, 14 April 2006 (UTC)
I see yout point. Scorning deitys and prophets can hurt your spiritual investments. But I am sorry. Personally I have another religious objective than going to heaven. I am out to reach Nirvana, and on that path there is a mandatory request to scorn as many monotheists as possible. --Suresh simple.png Swami A. Suresh 09:04, 17 April 2006 (UTC)
Oh my God, it's Pat Robertson! -Alexjohnc3 22:13, 17 April 2006 (UTC)
If god exists, he (or she?) won't care that I say anything about him (or her?). Because god is a jew according to the bible, he/she must be a joker. Regarding mohammed, jesus christ and the other prophets, how can someone take that shit seriously? It's meant to be a joke, but some idiots didn't understand that. Roacutan

Do you actually think about what you say or does it stem directly from some preprocessed drum of thoughts that your stupid religion has presented you with? Seriously, do you think someone who is asshole enough to sentence *anyone* to eternal damnation is really gonna care about us making fun of some prophet. --Damozn 10:19, 12 June 2006 (UTC)


Oh dear, where do I start with this guys rambling... hmmm. From the top I guess.

1) You said something about deeds and favours that he grants us? I suppose that tsunamis, earthquakes, poverty, war, and higher taxes come under "favours"?

2) Something about judgement day, and the replaying of your life in front of your own eyes? Don't you believe god has a plan? If I'm an atheist, it's because of gods devine plan. Seriosly. Free will? Can't happen if your imaginary sky daddy knows EVERYTHING that you are going to do anyway, right? So, judgement day? HAH! A farce to keep born agains like YOU paying Pat Robinson.

3) Something about life being all about the after life? BAH!! Typical Christian bullshit. You are being a good person (and I make an assumption that you ARE a good person), for the wrong reasons, namely "Oh noes! If I do that I'll BURN IN HELL WHEN I DIE!" And then there's me, who grew up learning (about killing someone, for instance) "Oh noes! I've ruined a happy persons life! He was a good man who was a valuable member of the workforce! And now his kids don't have a male role-model!" Which is more practical, I wonder?

4) Something about making sure that you are on the right path? You are in as much danger of being on the wrong path as me. Hehe, silly christian, with your One True Faith (tm).

5) People of faith really get my goat. Did you know that? --203.206.16.86 08:16, 16 June 2006 (UTC)


It's about time humans evolved beyond need of an excuse for the origins of the world. God doesn't exist, nor does any other god. Deal with it. - Zero 07:27, 21 February 2007 (UTC)

Why is there respect for Muslims?[edit source]

This page has you scroll down a bit to actually see the page. However, the many Jesus pages (many of which are offensive to Christians) are not like that. I say they should all be one way or another. And besides, what are the Muslims gonna do, suicide bomb Uncyclopedia headquarters?68.69.111.110 00:30, 17 April 2006 (UTC)

Yup. Pretty much. We're on the way using our flying carpets, honestly. The thing is, reading this article whoever wrote it has no inside information on islam so it looks more insulting/stupid than funny. Wait, that's the same case with almost every article on here, too bad! 202.89.188.44 17:39, 26 December 2006 (UTC)
Its fixed now.--58.104.81.209 04:11, 18 April 2006 (UTC)
I don't know. I liked the scroll. And I do not see it as "respect to muslims", just a sort of "ho ho - this is spooky - really sure you can stomach it" joke that basically falls back on hypersensitive muslims themselves.--Suresh simple.png Swami A. Suresh 04:56, 18 April 2006 (UTC)

Muslims are respected because people are afraid theyll blow their car up :(.--217.85.125.194 19:50, 17 December 2006 (UTC)

Muslims insist on respect to their religious sacred ways. They want that people stop making disrespectful fun jokes/cartoons/images not only to Mohamed, but to Jesus and to Moses, and any sacred religious figure. And the response is already comming: CARB: Coalition Against Religious Bigotry:

"The Coalition Against Religious Bigotry includes right-wing heavyweights Brent Bozell (president, Media Research Center), Tony Perkins (president, Family Research Council), Michael Medved (talk radio host), Bill Donohue (president, Catholic League) and Tim Winter (president, Parents Television Council)."

A first step to the "Republic of Gilead".

First Commandment: misunderstanding[edit source]

I would like to state here, that my two questions are purely theological, theoretical, and I do not mean to offend anyone.

1. The two of the major religious can not get the First God's commandment straight. It says: "Do not have OTHER Gods than me, do not make THEM images, do not serve them, do not bring them sacrifieces" etc. In other words, Do not serve THEM, the OTHER gods. I.e., it is perfectly OK, to make images and serve ME (i.e. Yehova, Jehova, Jahve, Allah, whatever you call me). However, the founders of the Islam, got it wrong at the very beginning: they are scared to make image of their own God, which means, they are not serving Him properly! On the other side, every christian chirch (actually Orthodox and Catholic only) have images of Iehova (i.e. Allah), since before year 300 AD. I.e. Before the Islam. So, images of Allah are everywhere, and the Muslim religious scholars and priests did not have problem with this for what: 1500 years? I do not get this. Someone help me?

2. Allah/Jahve/Yehova is God, but Mohamed is a mortal human. The first Gods Comandment applies to GODS only, not to HUMANS. The application of the Islamic rule "no images of GOD should be drawn" to the human Muhamed, actually raises Mohamed to the rank of GOD and is therefore blasphemy and an offense of God. Can someone apply logic, when arguing in theological terms? Or just show me were my logic fails? And why no one else before me has raised these issues?

This article is a gem[edit source]

I have to say that, after wading through pages upon pages of "Celebrityname1 invented Palestine in 1574 while having gay sex with Celebrityname2 who was married to Oscar Wilde and Oprah and had gay sex with a Grue", I had given up hope of finding anything even remotely amusing but, after stumbling on this diamond in the rough, I've changed my mind. Funny as hell - almost as funny as the flaming from irate illiterate muslims on this talk page. Whoever wrote this, I salute you! Icanhearthegrassgrow 15:59, 22 February 2007 (UTC)

Nude Burkah Woman[edit source]

It is funny, but it is porn. Alas.

I have not seen this image nor do I wish to, but I can assure you sir that it is for purely educational purposes. AlexJohnc3 Complain F@H Fx2 05:28, 21 April 2007 (UTC)

I have spent several hours studying this image and I conclude that it is shocking and absolutely unacceptable. There is absolutely no excuse for showing images of women with rather nice bodies with their tops off. So that other people can see just how disgraceful it is, here is a link: [1]. Tode 18:14, 1 July 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for the link, my friend, alerting me to this gross example of sick porn. You are right - I spent some time looking at it and zoomed in to make sure it's as disgraceful as you say. Should be banned (now I've saved a copy). RabbiTechno 18:17, 1 July 2007 (UTC)

Yes, lets blindly be brainwashed and follow the teachings of an illiterate paedophile, pray 5 times a day and give up all thoughts of having freewill, freedom of speach and the use of a brain to question everything, because they're all too busy trying to memorise their comic (sorry Koran); trying to look like him by growing a stupid beard (lets save the sharp implements for beheading kufars!) and subjugating their women - wassup you pathetic muslims, cant you read????? Its a sexist, violent piece of shite! Oh, yeah, and its only got 165 verses referencing Jihad! Bring back peace loving Jesus!


If you knew him, you will regret joking about him.[edit source]

Warning: This is not funny, nor stupid. This should be a little bit reasonable. Joking of a person is not bad generally, as long as you do not accuse him of something bad or insult him. I love to laugh, but I hate it when I see someone shows my religion symbols bad. You may consider this comment as a 'hatred' comment, but how can you judge that the creators of the page itself did not mean to show hatred in it? I hope we all read about Mohamed's life, from good sources that can be considered trustful. If you thought about it, How could Mohamed build a civilization that lived for 1300 years and still alive and getting more powerful? The answer is simple, because he is the greatest human lived on earth one day. You may wonder how can I write this while we see Muslims in such bad life? Again, the answer is simple, they did not follow him and did not obey what he said. I invite you to read about him, learn how he lived and what great things he did and rejudge him. And I am sure, if what you really wanted to learn about him, you will find that this page is too bad, not for him alone, but also for all humanity.– Preceding unsigned comment added by 196.218.137.111 (talk • contribs)

I DID know him. Him, me and Odin used to be drinking buddies, before he went all serious. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
If you knew him, you will regret joking about him? He died hundreds of years ago died hundreds of years ago, so nobody here knew him including Mr. 196.218.137.111. Why would we regret making fun of some dead guy that founded an existing religion? I mean, you assume the Quran is correct based on the fact that the Quran says its correct, it’s the same with Christians. And the reason the Quran is full of awful things is that a lot of it is based on the Bible.--Mrasdfghjkl 10:40, 1 July 2007 (UTC)

AMAZING DISCOVERY!!!!!! The reason no pictures of mohhamad exist is that all the crayons melted in the middle east and no one can draw him– Preceding unsigned comment added by 66.191.197.64 (talk • contribs)

Yes, yes please read about him and you too can screw a nine year old girl and live in the desert and have god write a book for you!! wooHOO!– Preceding unsigned comment added by 65.69.81.2 (talk • contribs)

I hope we all read about Mohamed's life, from good sources that can be considered trustful. If you thought about it, How could Mohamed build a civilization that lived for 1300 years and still alive and getting more powerful? The answer is simple, because he is the greatest human lived on earth one day. You may wonder how can I write this while we see Muslims in such bad life? Again, the answer is simple, they did not follow him and did not obey what he said. - – Preceding unsigned comment added by 196.218.137.111 (talk • contribs)
Well, unsigned, Mohamed managed to build not so much a 'civilisation' as a 'very-un-civilisation' where women are bagged up because if they show the slightest bit of skin they are inviting rape (good on you Muslim guys for the self control there!) where anyone who is not a believer can be killed (a bit like Scientology with guns and bombs), where people threaten to go on mass-killing sprees because a newspaper prints a cartoon showing a cult leader (I refuse to call Islam a religion, it's just a cult like Star Trek, Mormonism, Raelianism, Scientology, David Hasslehof etc) as a violent being. If Islam wants respect, it had better start by showing some to other people, rather than driving flaming cars into airports to try to kill innocent holiday makers. By the way, when you die, the Koran was mistranslated, it's not a load of virgins you get, it's a load of Virginians. Ouch!Morrismaciver 18:00, 5 July 2007 (UTC)
Regarding the Danish newspaper reference, its cool you call it "The Blasfemasen" but i suggest that you Scandinavify the name and for instance call it: "The Bläsfemåsen". 12:11, March 7, 2010 (UTC) Regards a Danish guy.

Communism would save all of your souls.(In Soviet Russia, We get YOU!!)[edit source]

Being an indian/communist/ad nauseum, doesn't it make more sense to simply let everybody do what theyre doing, give up the whole"Im better/richer/gooder/more likely to go to heaven than YOU!" idea, let all the religions do what they want, even aethism, and let the God(s, if thats how you roll) take care of it when the big explosion comes around? and, yes, the article may be offensive, but if God/Allah/Brahma/all the other names for Thee out their(clever use of hte word thee, no more reference to gender) thinks its bad, he'll send the jerk to hell(How dare you insult someone who is a prophet, or is considered a prophet? Enjoy Hell, it's summer all year round!). Heil Stalin!


In Soviet Russia, The World Blows Up YOU!!

--AeomMai 22:48, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

There we go, theres an offense tag, now its "ok" to be offensive--AeomMai 22:57, 13 June 2007 (UTC)

I'm a Christian, but not a good one. As a good Christian I will be expected to warn you for your sins and pray to God for you all to be forgiven as all of you don't know what you do.

Will I do that?

No, I'm not a quite good one... Actually I don't mind... You are free to say whatever you want... My God isn't a weak god that needs defense from His creation... I wish u continuing insult and mock Him so He himself will put a revenge on you...

He's not a weak god, he's below that. He doesn't even exist!

I always knew Christianity was a silly religion....~Jewriken.GIF 16:39, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Should be M-O-H-A-M-M-A-D[edit source]

"Muhammad" just looks madddd awkward!

Should really be "Ronald MacDonald".

"مُـحَـمَّـد " is Muhammad, dumbass. Not Mohammad.

The rare demo tape controversy[edit source]

Sex with 72 virgins was a slight error, its never ending anal rape and nibbles on the earlobes from this bloke

The writers wrongly forgot to write in the right song in the article. I'll try to right that wrong here by writing the right wrong... I mean song:


Mohammad, oh Mohammad

The raghead musical fruit

If you die in his name

72 virgins you get to root


This was reportedly his lost demo tape, recorded by him 2 years after his death, and lost for many years until found in late 2007 inside green nigger Bill O'Reilley's underwear pocket. Although O'Reilly claims he does not know how it got there and also that picture of him in bed with a George W. Bush blowup sex doll isn't really him.

Proposal[edit source]

I propose that this image should be the main image at the top of the article.

Allah's True Prophet

ياناس ياولاد المتناكة ، هيا وصلت انكم تهينوا[edit source]

ياولاد الوسخة

تهينوا الله ورسوله

الله يحرأكم


to all man write this about GOD & MUHAMMAD PUH all this wrong you will die in dark & fire

We can only hope. Thanks for visiting... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
'Tis speculation based on a book. Make of it what you will. By the way, "DIAF" ("die in a fire") is a common Internet insult, regardless of Muslim ideas of hell or Christian ideas of hell. Rickyrab 13:54, 18 May 2008 (UTC)

those who write all this thing about prophet should think first that they are normal or if god made you abnormal if you cant figure out pray if u believe in god or devil pray if you cant get answer from him that come to me i will beat hell all the abnormallity from you.

you know your future dancing with devil mistress andn devil screwing you and your mama papa your kids and their kids.... if you dont stop writing such bullshit i wish it comes true for your sake

All those who pray whilst facing a rock in mecca should think to themselves, why are we praying to a rock (Idol) when we should worship god in spirit who is a spirit and not through a silly rock in mecca. Praying and facing the rock in mecca is the same as worshiping a statue or an image. So you do not realise that you worship a false god.MerbabuBombaybelly 20:40, 5 April 2008 (UTC)
  • ehm.. That "angry" guy was bullying ;) --Dadadudi 06:22, 3 March 2009 (UTC)

Stupidity[edit source]

Did you know that Muhammad's Mother Died when he was 8? So that Last ugly FX is inaccurate and rude. If your mom died when you were young, would you want somebody making fun of her? Nobody can deny that muhammad was a person, since his body is in Medina, KSA.


You people are stupid people! I am deleting this article.--Obaidz96 01:37, 21 May 2008 (UTC)

It's supposed to be inaccurate you flaming moron. This is Uncyclopedia. Uncyclopedia. Uncyclopedia.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 01:41 May 21, 2008
Oh UNcyclopedia? Which exit is Cajekopedia?   Le Cejak <May 21, 2008 [1:43]>
Right here.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 01:44 May 21, 2008
ha HA!!! THANKS! THANKS, MR. DOUCHE! :)   Le Cejak <May 21, 2008 [1:46]>
Like where did my sig go? 90.213.23.220 01:49, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
Is this where all the big wigs hang out? CANZ SOME1 HALP ME WIT MAH ARTICKLES?!??!? HELP ME PLOX MAH LOLZ!!!! 75.128.25.59 01:54, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
Worst. Site. Ever. Still better than Wookipedia though... --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent OZ! Noobaward.jpg Wotm.jpg Unbooks mousepad.PNG GUN.png 11:19, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
Huh. So he got magically teleported to Jerusalem, rode some kind of Pegasus up into heaven and the eternal company of the saints, for which Islam has to hold half of Jerusalem to allow access to this sacred site of his elevation, then coincidentally he turns up buried at Medina? Wow, and it's all true, they say. Who says you can't learn stuff about the real world on Uncyclopedia? Good news is that you can make a lot of money this way you know. All we have to do is steal a tiny bit for a DNA sample, microinject into a zygote, and voila! we have real life literal Sayyid pigs, with a variety of minor human traits, which we can use for selective breeding super-delicious kosher-halal hams for Passover and Chanukah, [2] not to mention humanized heart valves that let the recipient wear a black turban and such like. Wnt

The nature of humor[edit source]

In order for something to be truly funny it should be funnily true. This article has measurably raised my overall opinion of Western civilization... Wnt

We're here to please... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

OK, MrN warning...[edit source]

I intend to give this article a dam good thrashing in the near future. It looks a mess, has loads of rubbish un-funny in it, and it needs to be chopped right back. If anyone has any objections speak now, or forever hold your piece... MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 02:56, Jun 7

.d, go ahead. --Allahgator 00:11, 12 June 2008 (UTC)
The older version [3] had a lot of random good stuff in it, and a lot of little bits of it have been lost here. Wnt
If you think you can make any of the stuff I removed fit with the current tone of the article please go ahead and put it back. Sorry, if I missed any of the good stuff, but as it was before my removal it was way too much of a rant, and lacked any real style or concept. Random can be funny if done correctly, so I look forward to seeing what you do... MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 19:48, Jul 5
Honestly, I think the old version is a better starting point. I don't really see a strong concept to this one - for example, the current "Fatwah" section seems irrelevant and not very funny. The old article just took every controversy that had come up and played them to their most glorious obnoxiousness, and seemed to have acquired snippets from a lot of different people. Teddy bears, hyper-Muhammed, the girl with the burkah and the bare boobies, all very funny stuff. The attempt to put a top-down organization on what is and should be a bathroom-wall project is just doomed to fail and really ought to. Yes, there was some stuff in that version that deserved the axe, but not its spirit. Wnt
Well the "Fatwah section" was something which was saved from the previous version. If you look, it's there. Nothing really added which is new. It was just so covered with random nonsense that you might not have seen it. I agree that this section is now probably the worst part of the current article. The users who have edited it since then (mostly myself and Mordillo) between us saved what we thought was worth saving...
I do however not agree that this page should be a "bathroom wall" project, where any random rant is allowed so long as it is insulting Muhammad. That is what it was. I agree that we may have missed much that was considered funny by some, but if you are seriously suggesting that we revert back to the old version you must be joking. My intention with tidying this article up was to try to guide it in a direction which would mean that one day this could be a featured article. As it was, it had no chance.
The concept of the current article is to treat Muhammad as a politician. Rather than as a religious leader. Before it had no concept whatsoever, other than it being a rant. In this current version there are also rather a lot of subtle references which perhaps you have missed. We wanted this page to be a little more sophisticated than a "bathroom wall project", and maybe if you read through it again you might pick up on some more of its humour.
If you can provide me with specific parts of the previous version which are particularly funny maybe I can understand what you are talking about more. As I said, it would be great if you could work these into the current article yourself.
Unfortunately I'm getting the impression from you that you are REALLY not a fan of Muhammad, and because of that, you think his page should be a disorganised mess. That's not how we do humour here at Uncyc. Like I said, probably the best thing for you to do would be to re-add that which you considered funny from the old version to this version. I did give a warning that I was going to do this, and you have left it a long time to voice your concerns. It is awesome that we can talk this one out on this talk page, and I hope that we can come to an agreement about this... MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 20:53, Jul 5
I'm sorry if I couldn't comment on your edits before you made them, but my precognition isn't that good. And some of this stuff does fly right over my head... fifteen pounds of humus? I looked up Bahira but I still don't get the joke... was he a hermit? is that funny? By comparison, the Slappy Squirrel diatribe ... that was polemic, but it was funny anyway.
Now as far as bias is concerned, sure, I have some bias, mostly against people who want to tell me what to do, but that's not really so relevant. What really matters is that, as the Good Orc says, "weeza wanna staat a WAAAAAAAAGH!" So far I haven't managed to start a war in Northern Ireland or Bosnia, and I've only driven one poster to suicide, [4] but hope springs eternal. Wnt
HeHe. That suicide thing was kinda funny... I'm not sure about the Humus thing, if you check the edits you will see that I had a different idea for that section, but Mordillo took what I had done, rolled it up and smoked it. Hea! Hopefully, we can get this article into a state where it will have humour which will appeal to all readers. Now if we could even manage to make it funny to Muslims as well as Muslim haters, then we would really have an article to be proud of... I hope you don't think I was trying to tell you what to do. I would never do that... Not me. Never. Now... Go edit this article and make it more funny dammit!

“A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.”

MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 22:26, Jul 5

YOU WILL BURN IN HELL FOR THIS[edit source]

   (what will you do, when you find out, there is no heaven, no hell, no purgatory, and no 72 virgins???)

THIS IS OUTRAGE. I DISPISE UNCYCLEPEEDIA.

ALL WHO RIGHT THIS ARTICLE ARE DOOMED. YOU WILL DIE HORRIBLE DEATH....

  (i'd love to be punished for whatever wrong i have done in my life, and go to any circle of hell: are you happy? go to heaven, out of my life-after-death)

I WILL PERSONALEE CUM IN YOUR HOUSE AND SLIT YOUR THROATS.

(you will "personalee" CUM ? what the fuck are u talking about, your gonna come in their house and CUM on them, what the fuck is wrong with you islam piece of shits, that you have to slit throats and ejaculate at the same time, on men for that matter, i always knew you fucks were all fags!!! THank you, muhammad slut...

I don't mind you slitting my throat but can you have a wank in your own house please

haha. gotcha. all religions icons should be bashed this way. – Preceding unsigned comment added by 59.178.169.239 (talk • contribs)

We also take the piss out of atheists. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 19:25, Dec 7

Disgusting Ideas[edit source]

  • What are you trying to justify? I know you are atheists. But a lot of people believe in God and his prophets. You had better show respect to them. Find a better way for joking. You wankers! --94.123.111.10 17:16, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
We have followers of all religions here. Including the religion of atheism. Why don't you write us an article? MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 17:19, Feb 8
I always assumed my god - who, last time I looked, was the same as your god (assuming you're Muslim) - had a sense of humour. Smile! :-) Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb.png kvetch Icon rabbi.gif Contribs Foxicon.png FOXES 17:22, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
Well Rabbi, your god certainly has a sense of humor, just look at Ehud Olmert O_O ~Jewriken.GIF 17:56, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
Our god is not the same as yours Muslim. You worship a pagan Allah. Sorry but its true MerbabuBombaybelly 10:17, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
i kno rite, Jack Bauer could kick allah's ass anyday! ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 10:56 11 February 2009
Heretic! -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 11:20, 11 February 2009 (UTC)

Jack Bauer could kick all their asses but the ratings for 24 have plummeted down under MerbabuBombaybelly 23:07, 13 February 2009 (UTC)

Down Under? You believe in Austrailia? ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 05:30 14 February 2009

MacMuck PeaceBeUphisAss was the MESSINGER OF GOD.

Insult the great Holinass, at your own peril.

Won't catch me doing it.

This miserable fucker was enlightened by God to the REAL Nature of Man - a cross between a beast and an insect without a soul and without a brain. Hell, he ordered women to be buried permanently in gunny sacks because naturally a man would jump her bones if he saw an INCH of skin from a thousand miles away. I mean automatic.

Hell, who would God pick But a perfect specimen - the biggest liar, thief, murderer, warmonger, child and animal rapist that has EVER SET foot on the freakin planet? That this bastard was all that and more should be enough to prove this sheetfuck was legit.

So you better hold your dick with one hand and the MacMud Peaccfuckemsez's instruction book on how to piss with the other

adding the Arabic interwiki[edit source]

  • Would someone please add the Arabic interwiki on this topic? (محمد بن عبد الله)

http://beidipedia.wikia.com/wiki/%D9%85%D8%AD%D9%85%D8%AF_%D8%A8%D9%86_%D8%B9%D8%A8%D8%AF_%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%84%D9%87 --Dadadudi 06:19, 3 March 2009 (UTC)

Muhammed's race[edit source]

One way to really offend Arabs and Black people at the same time (Arabs are also cousins to those black ones) is to depict Muhammed as an African "dune coon" or like in the SNL-spinoff comedy TV Funhouse "dune bunnies" in the sands of Ethiopia, just across the Red Sea from Saudi Arabia. Many Arabs & Muslims alike don't seem to like Jews whom perceive them as a bunch of rich white skinned people anyways. Even the Radical Muslims portrayed white Americans and Jews with pig faces, to get back from being called "monkeys" by the white man. + 71.102.2.206 06:03, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Horrible and Horribly Unfunny[edit source]

This remains one of Uncyclopedia's undistinguished turds. I can see a number of writers have attempted to modify some of it but it is on fundamentally rotten foundations. --Romartus 12:59, 13 May 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for your suggestion. When you believe the Allah's True Prophet Muhammad page needs improvement, please feel free to change it. You can edit almost any page on Uncyclopedia by just following the "Edit" link at the top of the page. We encourage you to write articles, since wikis like ours develop faster when everybody contributes. You can always preview your edits before you publish them or test them out in your userspace. If you need additional help, check out our getting started page or ask the friendly folks at AAN.

Also, you may want to log in, but it's not mandatory.

-OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN22:57, 11 Jun

I had forgotten I had registered a complaint on this page earlier! Those were the days!! --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 16:02, December 8, 2011 (UTC)

Terrible and Terribly Unfunny[edit source]

I consider myself an atheist and have no problem with taking the piss out of religion, but this and all other articles on Uncyclopedia about Muslims and related subjects are unfunny and offensive. I've read some of the Jewish articles and some of the many (MANY) Christian and Jesus articles, and while they may be offensive to believers they seemed to be actual satire and not hyperbolic and bigoted attacks on the religion. STParker--STParker 00:48, 25 July 2009 (UTC)

You a true atheist? You ever pissed on Yahweh, Md. and Yeshu together? And we don't spare atheism either.JamesSomething 15:33, December 8, 2011 (UTC)

what the fuck[edit source]

Very insulting. If you guys don't care if someone insults your prophet or your faith, that doesn't mean it ok to insult others. If Christians don't care if someone talk bad about jesus that's their business but THIS doesn't justify what you wrote about him or Muhammed. there is so much hate and insult in muslim related pages. This is obvious. Muhammed or Allah means everything to a muslim at least take the same degree of care as you do when writing about jewish related topics. it's really awful to write that about god or about a holy person that means a lot to millions of people. it's like you stabbing people in their hearts to make someone laugh. you like that don't you? don't let your hate control you. be fair. stay away from religion. there are a lot of ways to be funny intellectually use funny criticism of the wrong actions .. have a message!.

71.62.88.59 00:49, June 7, 2011 (UTC) Al Zach

Taking away someone's laughs is the greatest sin of all. The Christians and Jews etc. too feel we are unfair towards them and soft on Mohammed. You don't know how a Jew feels unless you are a Jew and similar for Christian, atheist....JamesSomething 15:37, December 8, 2011 (UTC)
No trollin' or flamin' please. The talk here should be about improving the article, not whether it should be about this subject or not. --Laurels.gifRomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 15:57, December 8, 2011 (UTC)

Interwikis[edit source]

Funny article. :) Please add [[fa:قرآن]] as Persian interwiki.

Done. ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 07:36, 31 January 2013 (UTC)