Babel:Rip

Welcome to Uncyclopedia in Mourning, the content-free encyclopedia that we wished Some User and Todd Lyons still edited Rest In Peace brave souls

Petty Politics Death Burial Services

The Dead Quaint Why?

Nothingness More Dead All are Death

In Memoriam Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced. Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor. A minute's deletion is to be observed. Today's Featured Article edit On this day... February 18: Penis Day (Tonga) 4000 BC - Men discover their hands reach down to their genitals, and there is peace for three thousand years before they get bored and start killing each other with pointy sticks. 1791 - American imperialists "liberate" the state of Vermont because of its vast maple syrup reserves. 1861 - Jefferson Davis is declared president of the Confederacy after saying the "hard R" N-word fifty times in only six seconds. 1885 - Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn is published, its numerous grammatical errors are labelled by the publisher as a regional dialect. 1970 - The Chicago Seven are found guilty of being dirty commie hippies who might as well be guilty. 2010 - WikiLeaks publishes hundreds of thousands of classified documents revealing exactly where the U.S. keeps its nudes.	Word of the Day Death Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much). Editors of en.uncyclopedia.co die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News. Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died. Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there... The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh... Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion, demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots. All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands. The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku. The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues. Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed. The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives. All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans. In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly. The Americans have organised a drive through service. edit If anyone cares on a day like today... ... that in Israel, chess sets contain rabbis rather than bishops? (Pictured) ... that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A, the sister drug to Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B, is very effective against Stupendous Tropical Meningitis? ... that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience? ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends! ... that sarcasm is totally the highest form of wit? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that midget cockpunching terrorists are a threat to the US and her allies? ... that reading this DYK suggestion just wasted 10 seconds of your life? ... that Christmas was cancelled in 1984 after an unfortunate accident between Santa and a Boeing 747? (Pictured) ... You can do anything with creativity, determination, and the exploitation of the working class? ... about Alliteration articulating an artistic approach aimed at annotating and arranging alphabetic accouterments as alarmingly asinine alignments? ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise? ... that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same? ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car? ... that ten out of ten cigarette manufacturers agree that Cancer is great? ... Donald Trump? More like... Donald Gay! Hah, gottem!
Today's featured Tombstone Adobe Potatochop is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England. Available with a number of plugins, including the most recent 'extra crispy' update, it is, along with Adobe Suppersready one of Adobe's most well known pieces of software. Image credit: Mhaille View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images Archive - Nominate new image
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Writer and Noob of the Month Oh great....another award for Todd.....(mutters darkly)....lets all be pleased for him.....(mumble, mumble)..... It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....Todd Lyons! Blasting through his competition, Todd sails to the lead with Richard M. Stallman at his right and OCD in his head. ToddBot2000 by day and Article Mastermind by night, his genius speaks for itself. "An incomparably superior human being," the Count of Monkey Crisco is known for his excellent work and knows it. Spawning such contributions as Midget cockpunching terrorists and an Evil Cookie Monster, the Count has left an indelible bootprint on the face of Uncyclopedia, forever. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006

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