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Welcome to Uncyclopedia in Mourning, the content-free encyclopedia that we wished Some User and Todd Lyons still edited Rest In Peace brave souls

Petty Politics Death Burial Services

The Dead Quaint Why?

Nothingness More Dead All are Death

Today's Featured Article In Memoriam Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced. Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor. A minute's deletion is to be observed. edit On this day... February 12: Undeniably Heterosexual Graeco-Roman Cultural Appreciation Day 804 BC - Prometheus (Pictured) steals fire and gives it to humanity, who use it to braise their finest meats. 1502 - Queen Isabella I of Castile bans Islam from her kingdom after getting stood up by an uncouth Moroccan. 1817 - During the Argentinian and Chilean wars for independence, joint troops cross the Andes mountains; without elephants, they settle for a herd of vicious llamas instead. 1912 - Puyi, the last emperor of China, abdicates the throne after the communists steal all the royal rice cakes. 1915 - The Lincoln Memorial begins construction, undercover KKK members secretly install a giant mucky swamp right next to it. 1947 - Paris becomes the capital of the fashion industry after Dior releases its collection. 2016 - Pope Francis and whoever the Orthodox Pope is meet up and try joining forces to finally defeat those dastardly protestants, but their plan is foiled by their numerous ecumenical differences.	Word of the Day Death Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much). Editors of en.uncyclopedia.co die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News. Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died. Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there... The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh... Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion, demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots. All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands. The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku. The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues. Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed. The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives. All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans. In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly. The Americans have organised a drive through service. edit If anyone cares on a day like today... *... that Afghanistan is known for its lush dirt farms, where dirt and dust are cultivated by villagers to enhance the scenic emptiness for which the region is known? ...that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"?
Today's featured Tombstone A screenshot from Age of Umpires II: Age of Cricket. In this example, we see the classic "Shotgun-Seven" formation being used to maximum effect. Any good Umpire would note that this places a good deal of emphasis on the left side, making it easy enough to sneak in the stray foul wicket. Image credit: Hindleyite View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images Archive - Nominate new image
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Writer and Noob of the Month Oh great....another award for Todd.....(mutters darkly)....lets all be pleased for him.....(mumble, mumble)..... It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....Todd Lyons! Blasting through his competition, Todd sails to the lead with Richard M. Stallman at his right and OCD in his head. ToddBot2000 by day and Article Mastermind by night, his genius speaks for itself. "An incomparably superior human being," the Count of Monkey Crisco is known for his excellent work and knows it. Spawning such contributions as Midget cockpunching terrorists and an Evil Cookie Monster, the Count has left an indelible bootprint on the face of Uncyclopedia, forever. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006

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