User:DarthBhourd/Brest, France
Brest is a small French town located in Brittany that was established circa 334 AC, when Joan of Arc was touring through. She is quoted at the dedication of the town:
“It was the breast of times, it was the worst of times. Ah, a tale of two titties.”
Saint Maximus the Lesser was bishop of this town in the fifth century. Saint Maximus the Lesser was adopted as the patron saint of Milte l'Branler centuries later.
Geography[edit | edit source]
Brest is known for its location in the rolling hill country. The town itself is nestled between a pair of hills known as the deCoup Tatas, named after a famous Gallic designer of amusing sackcloth (which was since evolved into a small guild of skilled artisans who manufacture fun bags). There are two geysers on the deCoup Tatas. Don't touch them or prepare to be torn apart by a torrent of milk that will flood all of France and cause all men within 10000 miles to get so hard they impale everyone in front of them.
Industry[edit | edit source]
Renowned for its milk factories, Brest, France has made quite an impact on the world. In addition to being the fun-bag center of Europe, it is also widely known as the place in France where the ladies wear no pants, and the resulting tourism trade is brisk--the demand for seeing Brest firsthand never subsides.
Government[edit | edit source]
BOOBIES RULE! The people of Brest elect a new mayor every 3 and half years. Decades of corruption and a paucity of qualified candidates have left the townspeople very cynical about their leadership. It is often said among them that the biggest boob always wins.
Tourist Tips[edit | edit source]
- As the town is very ancient and the surrounding area very sensitive, visitors are asked to "Look, But Don't Touch". This rule is very difficult to uphold when reaching the Red Light district of the area.
- There are geysers on the deCoup Tatas.
