ICan't Believe It's Not iPod

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“I can't believe it's not iPod!”

~ A man on iCan't Believe it's not iPod!

“I can't believe it's not iCan't Believe it's not iPod!”

~ Oscar Wilde on a real iPod
The Microsoft iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! shares many features with the Apple iPod, but has two function buttons rather than one.

The iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! was launched in 2004 by Microsoft as a low-in-sodium, low-in-fat alternative to the iPod. The iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! tastes just like the original iPod, with all the qualities of iPod, but is easier to spread. Popular with several leading dieticians, iCan't Believe It's Not iPod claims to offer a healthier option to the tumor causing iPod. The iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! now comes in five flavours: iCky, iOdine, iScream, Conjunctive iTis and Syrup of iPecac. The sixth flavour, iKEA, was originally slated for release with the other five, but it was missing two screws and a wheel. The iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! ran into financial difficulties in its first year when it was discovered that the units were simply iPods that had fallen off a truck, with slight aesthetic modifications. Since its difficult conception the iCan't Believe It's Not iPod has gone from strength to strength.

Strengths of iCan't Believe It's Not iPod![edit | edit source]

The most obvious strength of iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! is the Blue Screen of Death. In most cases it seems to appear just when the song gets to the best point.

Another strength is the complete uselessness of the second function button except that it increases the frustration of the user because it makes it harder to press the actual button.

Finally the iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! is completely incompatible with every operating system except for Windows XP and for some strange reason Windows for Workgroups 3.1. This anomaly has not been explained and puzzles scientists, theologians and other more useless people.

Its weaknesses have not been found yet but it is only a matter of time.

The iCan't Believe Product Range[edit | edit source]

iCan't Believe It's not iPod is the latest in along line of Microsoft products, including the iCan't Believe It's Not Mac! and the ever popular iCan't Believe It's Not PlayStation!. Microsoft have even created their own Uncyclopedia-inspired website, rather predictably named iCan't Believe It's Not Uncyclopedia!.

Successor[edit | edit source]

Rumors float around that the next step for Microsoft is the iCan't Believe It's Not iCan't Believe It's Not iPod! Other rumors suggest that another device is in the works tentatively titled "iCan't Believe its not iPad!"

Lawsuits[edit | edit source]

Recently Microsoft has been in the firing line when the makers of I Can't Believe It's Butter decided to sue Microsoft for copyright violations. The final verdict in the 9th circle of hell was 9:1 in Microsoft's favour on the panel of 4 members. The losers are appealing to a higher court but due to a backlog it does not seem to be any good.



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