Cockfighting

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Even I can't tell the difference.

Cockfighting is a sport in which two people duel each other using Chickens instead of swords. It started out as a sport in which chickens fought one another, and took quite a while until it reached the sport that it is today.


History[edit | edit source]

The colliseum of ancient Rome was actually a cockfighting ring called the "Cockoseum", in which vicious gladiator pigeons (some of them up to 7 feet high) dueled each other with swords. The idea that human beings fought in the colliseum is a falsehood, invented by historians who didn't think fighting birds was interesting enough for an 8 year old in history class to pay attention to. However, the only purpose of the colliseum was for cockfights (and occasional fights between insects that the Romans captured. They'd catch two bees, put them in a jar in the center of the ring, and be entertained by hour after hour of insect warfare). However, shortly before the collapse of the Roman Empire, the nature of the game changed, and rather than simply having two chickens fighting each other, humans fought each other, using live chickens instead of swords.

Cockfighting should not be confused with the popular college drinking game penis fencing.

Rules[edit | edit source]

Fighters in ancient Roman cockfights wore quite a bit of armor, for two reasons: it would help protect them in the fights, and they would look good in manly gladiator movies made many years in the future. Players would grip their live chickens by the back legs, though some chose to grip them by the beak, and would go out into the ring and beat each other with the chickens until one gladiator killed the other, or until they got bored. Only one man ever actually died in a cockfighting match, when he tripped and had a concussion.

Cockfighting as an olympic sport[edit | edit source]

The sport briefly resurfaced in an indirect way in the 1933 Olympics, as a form of fencing, except players used Sandhill Cranes instead of fake spears. Also, that year in the boxing event, another form of cockfighting resurfaced. Boxers strapped eagles to their hands instead of using boxing gloves. However, eagles were declared an endangered species shortly afterwards, and they continued the event, but strapped turtles to their hands instead. With this new event a new type of cock (heh heh) steroids were created.

Cockfighting in recent years[edit | edit source]

Cockfighting is now outlawed in 47 States, and in most other countries. However, the law is only specific to chickens, and a new sport by the name of "penguin fighting" has become popular amongst Eskimos and zookeepers. However, the name Cockfighting is still occasionally used, if only to please teenagers. Also, although people don't cockfight as much anymore, Dogfighting (in which players beat each other the head with Dogs) has become more popular than ever before. This may be due to a name change, from "Dogfighting" to "bitchfighting". Cockfighting sounds sexual, but dogfighting has no sexual undertones. The minute it was renamed "bitchfighting", people starting doing it much more often.

The word "cockfighting" is also used to describe a game commonly played on stages in Las Vegas gay bars, in which two men dress up in chicken suits and hit each other with swords shaped like Penises.