JOwOl

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~_~
This user is a definite fan of Anime.
~_~
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This user is easily distracted by anything shiny.
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my mood ring
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stimulating
ideas
daring
wants
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This user is a world citizen
…and belongs to the human race, the only
real race on Earth!
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XD
This user is interested in comedy, and may enjoy writing or performing it.
XD
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This user devours babies. Whole.
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This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM
Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.
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€€€
This user is a libertarian, so they are much too stoned to hear you complain, fundie!
€€€
Serbia
This user is proud to be Serbian, and if you mess with them you're in a big trouble!
Serbia
Sweden
This user is Swedish
…and hates going to IKEA!
(List of Swedish Uncyclopedians)
Sweden
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This user supports Ukraine in their fight against Russia.
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This user has escaped from Ojai.

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This user has
made it to Ketchikan.
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This user has beaten level 10 of Spinny Links.
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This user has tested positive for ISTP-T on the Myers-Briggs Test
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This user believes in the Noodly Appendage of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism
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This user speaks their mind quite often. Be careful what you wish for.
This user speaks English at a near-native level.
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This user likes welcoming new users to the wiki.
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This user huffs kittens (probably).
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This user likes goats.
Baaaahaahaahaahhh!
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This user is autistic and would be pretty fun to prank.
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Ain't no big meaty chunks in this user's thick brown gravy.
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This user owns by one or more cats just so they can keep an eye on them.
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This user is a boy and is made of trucks, trains, and airplanes.
\m/
I am a metalhead; I wear offensive shirts, I headbang to really loud music. I have long hair, but am not a hippie.
\m/
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This user is openly Gay
and unabashedly proud.
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This user identifies as asexual (mostly because it sounds better than "virgin").
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This user walks down the
left-hand path.

Thus, they would be considered
evil by the Catholic Church.
(List of left hand path Uncyclopedians)
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This user is a sinner, and bows before Satan.
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Meat
This user is mostly or entirely made of meat
Meat
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This user completely enjoys pie because it is awesome.
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This user enjoys painting.
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This user likes Rap and Hip Hop because it has rhythm and flow, motherfuckas!
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This user enjoys punk rock.
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eww
This user hates flat design and recommends the total destruction of all existing software, companies and objects that use it.
eww
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This *bleep* user likes to *bleep* the use of *bleep* *bleep* profanity *bleep*
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This user is a fucking Moron.
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This user is a Pop Team Epic Fan You understand now.
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This user is a skeptical agnostic
and doesn't know if they don't know
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This user supports Palestine in their endless fight against the IDF.
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This user hates telephones. Probably due to the fact that the U.S. government is monitoring them.
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:o
Just because I think everyone is trying to kill me doesn't mean they aren't. You know what I mean?
:o
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This user is a bit of a pyromaniac.
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You can help by paying for their Ritalin, or finding them a kitten to play with.
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This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM
Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.
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O.O
This user is often confused for a girl.
O.O
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This user will give you a seizure.
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This user is a Viking and enjoys killing, looting and pillaging.
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This person helps reduce over-population by killing people, thus helping the environment.
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This user is a native speaker of Dumbass.
This user is a native speaker of Furry.
This user is a native speaker of Gibberish.
This user only speaks 1337 enough to seduce native 1337 speakers.
This fucker speaks Fight heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
This user speaks Lesbian at a near-native level.
Joeliosis Scoliosis of Glitterton III
Uncyclopedian, animator and professional doormat
— Uncyclopedian —
Ik It’s not Halloween yet shut up let me have fun
Ik It’s not Halloween yet shut up let me have fun
NameJoel
Born
  • 1086, Glitterton
  • Glitterton
Name in real lifeJoeliosis Scoliosis Of Shitterton III
NationalityGlittertonian
CountryGlitterland
Current locationGlitter world
LanguagesSvedish and Engrish. I understand a few words in Serbian
Current timeGMT+2
EthnicityGlittertonian
RaceCaucasian Glittertonian
Height168 cm
Weight47 kg
HairI wanna dye it black with blue highlights
EyesGlitter
HandednessRight
Blood typeGlitter glue
SexualityGay as hell
IQ2
Personality typeISTP-T
AlignmentChaotic Neutral
Family and friends
PetsMy Cat Gösta
Education and employment
OccupationGlitter maker
EducationSpecial needs
Primary schoolFailed
High schoolExpelled for planting a whole ass tree in the toilet
UniversityUniversity of Shitterton with a degree in Art, music, cooking and somehow doing everything wrong
Hobbies, favourites and beliefs
HobbiesArt, videogames and drinking Soda
ReligionPastafarian, Glitterism
PoliticsWoke Libertarian
AliasesJOwOl, Jol, Joeliosis, Marshall, Joel Rat
Interests

South Park

Contact info
WebsiteMaking a website was more boring than I expected. Sorry
AIMMy hands are too shaky
XMPPI’m scared of needles
.MacCheese
Google++Who even uses google+
Account statistics
JoinedApril 29 2025
SignatureJOwOl (talk) 08:11, 20 February 2026 (UTC)JOwOl!


ALL HAIL THE UNCYCLOPEDIAN GODS AND MAY OUR MOCCASINS BE SWAG

I use He/It pronouns. I also use Meow/Meowself sometimes

Donke is my classmate and former friend. He doesn’t use Uncyclopedia though. He just made an account

Also check out the UnGame i'm working on. I try to work on it at least twice a week and I take breaks on saturdays and sundays. If I don’t work on it for more than a week it means i’m on a break. I also die every summer break so I don’t use Uncyclopedia then

I'm currently a bit busy with class, so I work on my game when I have Free time

Every one if free to add more to my game if they want! I’m genuinely greatful for everyone who has helped me with my game, even if it’s just something small <3


History[edit | edit source]

One fateful day in the small village of Shitterton, United Kingdom, a baby was born. His name was Joel. Joel was a special kid, and by that I mean he’s disabled. He’s the child of holographic glitter and rainbows. He loves to paint his nails, wear colorful bracelets, playing sports like volleyball and tennis, and he loves Hatsune Miku. His favorite colors are lime, pink and Spiro Disco Ball, which is the color of this page’s background. He’s autistic and scored an ISTP-T on every personality test he’s ever done. He’s stubborn, quiet, cowardly, sensetive and a doormat, because he lets people walk all over him, because he’s afraid of retaliation. He genuinely cares about the people he loves, but holds extreme grudges against people who have hurt him His racist classmates and his aunt who calls him egoist for not wanting to do things he doesn’t like and denying everything bad she’s done while calling herself a good person

Answering questions nobody ever asked me[edit | edit source]

’’What is your favorite color?’’

Blue and pink. Also any neon color

’’What is your favorite music genre? ’’

Anything except for phonk

’’Who is your favorite artist?’’

Yung Spinach. He was literally my top artist on spotify weapped 2025 I’m not even shitting you

’’What is your favorite band?’’

Gorillaz

’’What are your favorite songs?’’

Stylo, She’s my collar, Sex murder party, Doyathing, Dirty Harry, Tranz and Damascus, all by Gorillaz

’’What is your favorite tv show?’’

I honestly don’t know

’’What is your favorite game?’’

Costume Quest. The first game is better than the sexond, but both are still bangers

’’How old are you?’’

I’m 1,582,736,490,827 years old

’’Who is your favorite youtuber?’’

Huggbees also known as the most handsome man on the fucking planet, Blake Jennings and Annamarie Forcino (I really like commentary)

’’What are your hobbies?’’

Drawing, gaming and crafting. I REALLY wanna try skating and DJing so I can finally feel cool for once. I’m also really interested in Conservation Biology

’’What is your favorite food?’’

Steak with spicy noodles and the fried chicken my mom makes

’’What is your favorite drink?’’

Soda. Any flavor except for grape. I live and breathe soda. I even made my own characters based off soda. I can’t live without soda. Soda is love, soda is life

’’What is your favorite animal?’’

Bats, cats, sharks and bunnies, but my favorite animals of all are specifically Thresher Sharks, Caribbean Reef Sharks and any cat breed, regardless if they’re big, small, wild, domestic, you name it. I can’t stand hearing about or seeing cats suffer and it makes me cry every time I think about it. Pretty much anything cute. Oh, and I also like Rice’s Whales. It’s a shame they’re decreasing in population and will likely go extinct soon

’’What is your favorite bug?’’

Madagascan Sunset Moth. Google it. They’re fucking fabulous. But I’m afraid of every other bug (Except for butterflies and moths)

’’Where on the political spectrum are you?’’

According to the Pew Research Center’s political typology quiz, I’m Progressive Left. My views and opinions are more woke/progressive than the rest of my family. I’m a libertarian and I hold strong hatred for fascists. In my country, my views align closest to Miljöpartiet and Vänsterpartiet

’’Are you religious?’’

I’m more spiritual than religious. I don’t practice anything and I don’t believe in god. I’m not religious because of people in every school I’ve gone to. I’m a therian but I’m still questioning my thereotype. I think It might be a cat and/or a monkey

’’What is your sexuality?’’

I’m Gay and I’m on the AroAce spectrum. I’m Transmasc and I came out and started transitioning when I was 12. I’m also xenogender (Specifically Catgender, which means my gender identity aligns with the behaviour and characteristics of a cat)

’’Do you have any conditions or disorders?’’

I’m on the Autism Spectrum (Moderate support needs) and I have ADD, depression and possibly ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder)

Diary[edit | edit source]

June 2 2026

My school did the egg drop experiment. I spent a week on my project. I built a shark out of cardboard, which had an open mouth and a gastral tract made of fabric like a puppet, except i removed the mouth fabric because it turned out horribly wrong because I used hot glue instead of fabric for most of it because the only sewing needle they have us was a fat one that refused to go through fabric thicker than 0,5 mm. I had to use my fucking body weight to get the needle through one stitch. Anyway, when we were about to drop out projects to see if the egg survived, i changed my mind and built a smaller one in 3 minutes using soft plastic, tape and cardboard. I didn’t wanna drop my shark because i only just now got to know that we were dropping our eggs from 3 FUCKING STORIES and i didn’t want my hard work to be destroyed. Spoiler alert, my god damn egg broke and now i no longer feel like i’m the stupidest kid in class, instead i now feel like the stupidest kid in school.

Also, there’s this twat-waffle crotch-sniffing shitass dookie-diaper wearing fuckhead in my class who’s been bullying me for the last two weeks. He was sent home ONCE for verbally harassing me in front of a teacher. He told the teacher he wasn’t gonna stop until i switch schools. Listen, school: SENDING HIM HOME ONCE DOESN’T DO ANYTHING. HE SEES IT AS A REWARD SO HE’S JUST GONNA CONTINUE BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GO HOME. GIVE HIM DETENTION. GIVE HIM EXTRA HOMEWORK. SUSPEND HIM. FUCKING EXPEL HIM. SENDING HIM HOME WON’T HELP

June 3 2026

My day was going so well. Until my bully heard about my egg project failing. He, of course, laughed, because why ignore my failures when you can make fun of me for something that happened to half of everyone who did the experiment? Why leave someone alone when you can harass someone who’s only crime is being a fucking fruit?

June 9 2026

Just finished writing a book for an english assignment. We’re gonna print it out and put it together so I can take it home because my mom wants to read it (I love you mom)

Also we’re having a field trip to a museum with the school but I’m not going so all I’m doing rn is sitting in the classroom, writing this, playing games and making tier lists

June 10 2026

Summer break starts tomorrow. Today, everyone had to clean their desks, empty their lockers, throw away trash and scrub the tables. I finished my english book and we were about to print it out, but one of the teachers told me to get back and clean a table that sits in the back of the classroom, although I had already cleaned everything the teachers told me. I had to clean the same table AGAIN to get rid of ”stains”, which were not stains, they were actually part of the table. I cleaned the whole fucking table with a worn-out sponge, and I didn’t even get to wash the soap off my hands, so now my hands are dry and crusty. Thanks. I was sobbing the whole time because it was so annoying. I broke down in the middle of it but i was told to get back to cleaning. It was so boring it hurt. It was painfully boring. Now, I was supposed to make holes with a hole puncher in my book pages, but I was in a bad mood while the teacher was explaining how to use a hole puncher like I was 5 years old. She got mad at me for not being polite about already knowing how to use a hole puncher (I’m not polite when I’m in an awful mood), that she told me to take a break until I calm down, clearly ignoring the fact that I don’t calm down from anger in 5 seconds like she does. Now I’m sitting at the table in the back of the classroom writing this, because I fucking hate my life, with crusty hands, crusty eyes and no dignity

Update. Just before lunch, the fire alarm went off. I panicked. I have officially cried 9 times today as of right now

June 11 2026

Last day before summer break! I’m in a better mood today. I’m wearing kandi, rainbow leg warmers, a homemade cheetah-print bow and a pride flag around my waist to piss of the guys. I’m also wearing a Hawaiian shirt

Happy Pride Month, gals, queers and non-binary peers!

September 8 2026

I’m back, bitches. I gained two new hyperfixations over the summer, and I also redesigned my sona


September 14 2026

Me and my best friend made up some bean boozled jellybean flavors. My favorites I came up with were bird shit or breast milk and fish ass or shark fin

Check out my totally awesome gallery >:D (Flash warning)[edit | edit source]

The best anime. It’s so good, that you can find it on youtube
Cringe and proud
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This is the only Frutiger Metro picture I could find
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My beloved little doofus
My favorite tree impersonator
My favorite flower
Dear god they’re beautiful!
Dear god these are even more beautiful!
Me
My favorite soda
Extreme close-up from my arm. These are my atoms. Say Hi to them