User:RPBnimrod

WARNING!!!

This article is very c-c-c-cold.
It will likely freeze you to death.
You are going to freeze if you read this article!!!

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

FNORD! This article is too close to the TRUTH! Citizens should begin to feel uneasy or bemused now. Fnord.

THIS ARTICLE IS FREAKING WEIRD.

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THIS ARTICLE A SPLODE.

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This user edits Hypercube and knows that there are exactly 962884857 rooms.

This user is a New Yorker The Patriots rule suck!! (Uncyclopedians from the greatest city ever!)

This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.

BACK 2 MOAR RAMNDOANM S$ZIT

This is an exemplary template. (Food for thought – chew carefully.) ​

Killed in Action

This user has made the supreme Uncyclopedia sacrifice, donating a life in the line of Zork only to be repeatedly eaten by a hungry grue.

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Allah loves this article

Allah himself has claimed that he loves his article and that it will not be destroyed like an infidel dog. Furthermore, the Jihad that was placed on this article has now been removed and its author will be proclaimed Muhammad. Fortunately, this article is sufficiently clothed and will not be blamed if it is raped.

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This is an edited, copydown image with pixels from various/ambiguous sources.

The edits to this image are hereby released of any copyright by the uploader. However, the individual pixels may be a copyright violation. Use for any purpose at your own risk, I care not, since Uncyclopedia has a fair use policy!

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THOU ART UNWORTHY
You are Not Worthy to view this page. Your Mortal Eyes Will Omit Some Parts of it that are only intended for God Themself.

BLASPHEMY!!! God hath declared ye article BLASPHEMOUS!!! It shall be deleted and its author shall be smitten immediately. Thus spaketh the Lord. Do something about ye problem or else we shall be forced to bring out...the comfy chair! Duh-duh-duh!

[1]

Mr. T says: "This image is in Public Domain . Use it for whatever you want, foo!" However, Mr. T is not always right. The source of this image may be unverified. use at your own risk!

[[AAAAAAAAAAA!

A message from Al Qaeda Osama Bin Laden cordially invites you to attend his terrorist training camp in Western Pakistan

Relax...... This article is certified safe for prudes. It is so tame, you could walk right up and poke it in the eye and it wouldn't fight back. The MPAA couldn't give it more than a PG rating, and even China has no desire to censor it. So just sit your family down in front of the computer, and bask in the warmth of its gentle humour.

I WILL OWN YOU YOU SUK ALL ONOR 2 MEZOR AWXOMENESS FREE VIAGRA

This user, along with Darwin, believes that George Dubya Bush evolved from a monkey.

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THIS IS SPARTA!

This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.

This user is a Net Authority Violator

♂

This user is a boy and is made of trucks, trains, and airplanes.

♂

This user hates George Bush and therefore believes he must be arrested and tried for war crimes.

DANGER Blanking or otherwise vandalising this page can be dangerous. jljkfhjkhdlkshfjkhfdgjkhhhhhhhdfsghjkfdhgklhsdfkghfkjhsgkjfdhlkjhj˙∆©˙©˙∆©˙©˙∆∂∂ users are currently banned after defacing this page. If you just got here and are mortally offended by these blatant lies, please read About Uncyclopedia, the Beginner's Guide, and How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid

IP

This person's IP is 3.141.592.654.

IP

nth

WARNING: Keep away from this user as they love working out nth terms.

nth

WARNING: Keep away from this user as they love the Fibonacci Sequence and anything to do with it.

This mathematical user loves pi

MS-4

This user speaks their mind all the time. Loudly. In your face!

MS-4

MS-N

This user grew up in a forward-thinking family, and therefore always speaks their mind, you nerd.

MS-N

MS-N This user grew up in a forward-thinking family, and therefore always speaks his mind, you nerd. What links here

MS-P

This ****ing ****er ****ing well speaks their ****ing mind all the g*******d time, ya j******.

MS-P

us-N

This user is a native speaker of American English.

us-N

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uk-P

This fucker speaks Correct English heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.

uk-P

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sa-N

This user is a native speaker of Sarcasm.

sa-N

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es-E

This user only speaks Español because it was a required course in school.

es-E

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ca-G

This user does not speak Canadian and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all Canadian speakers.

ca-G

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17-2

This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of 1337.

17-2

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ao-2

This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of AOLer.

ao-2

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css-4

This user speaks .css at a near-native level.

css-4

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enl-G

This user does not speak English, but Louder and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all English, but Louder speakers.

enl-G

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bs-4

This user speaks Bullsh!t at a near-native level.

bs-4

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fig-E

This user only speaks Fight because it was a required course in school.

fig-E

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gee-3

This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Geek.

gee-3

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fh-N

This user is a native speaker of Fuckhead.

fh-N

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ht-3

This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of HTML.

ht-3

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il-3

This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Igpay Atinlay.

il-3

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mor-G

This user does not speak -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . speakers.

mor-G

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MW-2

This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of MediaWiki.

MW-2

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pt-1

This user is able to contribute with a basic level of Português.

pt-1

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rh-A

Yah meeht nawt beh abble tew undersvand zis usehr behkuz zey zpeek Random Humour whif und estreemleh theuck akzent.

rh-A

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wr-A

Yah meeht nawt beh abble tew undersvand zis usehr behkuz zey zpeek Write-only whif und estreemleh theuck akzent.

wr-A

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This user is American …and unabashedly proud of it! (List of American Uncyclopedians)

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This user is a New Yorker The Patriots rule suck!! (Uncyclopedians from the greatest city ever!)

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This user is black.
This user is right-handed. In Latin, they would be Dexter.
This user's IQ is over 120+.
This user is POOR, has never passed GO, and never collected $200.
… This user would be a professional procrastinator, but they can't be bothered. …
No user serviceable parts inside.
This user wants Caffeine featured.
Sense This user promotes the radical idea of having sense. Sense | This user identifies as straight, and is probably grossed out by gay PDA. This user is Single but is currently stalking someone. Hey, if you see the Police, you should "Warn A Brotha'". This user is not who you think they are. In fact, they are someone who you think is not them, who thinks they are (who you think is not - who is).	? This user prefers to be anonymous. That is, numbskull, they don't want you to know who they are. ? Bad User This user is an asshole. Please avoid direct contact. This user is a geek. This user is cooler than you. This *bleep* user likes to *bleep* the use of *bleep* *bleep* profanity *bleep*	This user hates you and everyone you care about. MEH This user redefines lazy! MEH This user is constantly PEEING. They apologize for the mess. | This mathematical user loves pi This user is a cereal killer.

This user will give you a seizure.

This user is EXTREMELY RANDOM Be advised: Approach with caution and a sense of humor.

This user has tested positive for ISTJ on the Myers-Briggs Test,.................................˙˙©ß˙∆©∆˙˚ß©∆ß©∂˚∆ƒ˚˙©∂ß

This user plays the saxophone just so they can replace 'sex' with 'sax' in conversations.

This User's Favorite Sound is Feedback!

??

This userbox is for people who know, if you wonder what they know, then you probably don't know.

??

AA!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!

AA!

Woof!

Woof! Woof! Woof! Ruff! Ruff Ruff! Arf! Arf!

Woof!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring....BANANAPHONE!!!!

This user does not know how to shot web.

HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, available at Walgreens.

?

Do not underestimate the power of It. Underestimation of the power of It will kill you from the sheer power of It.

?

This user was brought to you by the letters B, J and the number 69.

usbx

This user likes to use userboxes.

usbx

BS

This userpage is bullshit.

BS

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IP

RPBnimrod's IP is 127.0.0.1.

IP

1+

This user has over 1 edit. Duh!

1+

This user doesn't trust Wikipedia as far as they can throw it… but nonetheless use it on a daily basis.

This person helps reduce over-population by killing people, thus helping the environment.

bu-L

This user may result in jamming speaking Bullet.

bu-L

Typo X

This uesr only spakes Tyop enouugh to seduec naitve Tyop spaekers.

Typo X

MS-1

This user sometimes speaks their mind but they prefer to leave the free thinking to the philosophers.

MS-1

IS THIS USR PGE N-OYNG?

Please vote below. Results will be shown when you have voted.
You are not entitled to view results of this poll before you have voted.

YESH

NO

...

maby

There were 0 votes since the poll was created on 01:42, 7 January 2013.

poll-id 3594D0D0D5B90A807F356399C0AA4942

AAAAAAA TemplAAAAAAAAte I MAAAAAAAAde

WARNING!!! This article loves your mom, and your mom loves it back.

DJSHFKDSJFAFDAKSLDFHJALSFHKJDSHFAKL

Somebody set up us the bomb. For great justice take off every 'zig'.

This unfit article should be immediately devoured by the much stronger Nobody cares, because Charles Darwin would have wanted it that way.

This user is a magic ninja!

??

This userbox is for people who know, if you wonder what they know, then you probably don't know.

??

This userbox is for people who know, if you wonder what they know, then you probably don't know. What links here

WARNING: Keep away from this user as they love the Fibonacci Sequence and anything to do with it.

WARNING: Keep away from this user as they love the Fibonacci Sequence and anything to do with it. What links here

AA!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!

AA!

AAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!! What links here

Meow!

Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow meow meow meow! MEOW!

Meow!

Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow meow meow meow! MEOW! What links here

Woof!

Woof! Woof! Woof! Ruff! Ruff Ruff! Arf! Arf!

Woof!

Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Ruff! Ruff Ruff! Arf! Arf! What links here

Eeek ahk sque'ek uhk kkkk'k squeek!

Eeek ahk sque'ek uhk kkkk'k squeek! What links here

EBG13-A

Guvf hfre vf n angvir fcrnxre bs EBG13.

EBG13-A

EBG13-A Guvf hfre vf n angvir fcrnxre bs EBG13. What links here

This mathematical user loves pi

This user loves pi What links here

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring....BANANAPHONE!!!!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring....BANANAPHONE!!!! What links here

This user does not know how to shot web.

This user does not know how to shot web. Please help by teaching them. (List of other users not knowledgeable on this subject) What links here

HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, available at Walgreens.

HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, available at Walgreens. What links here

simp

This user does not like userboxes, and grimaces at the thought of having this abomination on their userpage!

simp

simp This user does not like userboxes, and grimaces at the thought of having this abomination on his\her userpage! What links here Note: This template is here because most people who don't like userboxes probably won't have this userbox on his or her userpage anyway.

This user is a toilet! In Soviet Russia, toilet urinates on YOU!!

This user is a toilet! In Soviet Russia, toilet urinates on YOU!! What links here

?

Do not underestimate the power of It. Underestimation of the power of It will kill you from the sheer power of It.

?

DANGER Blanking or otherwise vandalising this page can be dangerous. At least 999999999 users are currently banned after defacing this page. If you just got here and are mortally offended by these blatant lies, please read About Uncyclopedia, the Beginner's Guide, and How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid

“When I grow up, I wanna be a platypus!”

~ Homsar on random humor

you want to fuck me in a cheeseburger while satan strokes your nuclear cockroach fish, don't you?

Russians eat German yyidderish cakes whilst pissing on dark matter that they found in your hip

for sake! what the fuck is with these randomnesses???

eat black camel putty from the mariana trench

fuck applejack cerial while killing your pet e. coli and ejaculating into your lungs

PLEASE NOTE YOU CAN NOW PROTECT NON-EXISTENT PAGES DIRECTLY, MAKING THIS REDUNDANT PAGE QUITE REDUNDANT. TOTALLY DO THAT INSTEAD. AND SEE SPECIAL:PROTECTEDTITLES.

THIS PAGE IS ON FIRE!

PLEASE NOTE BEFORE READING: THIS PAGE IS ON FIRE...
You may be about to read something which is on fire, be careful and make sure you don't burn yourself because this article is definitely on FIRE!!

THIS PAGE HAS A HIGH FIRE RISK!!

BE CAREFUL AND VIEW AT YOUR OWN RISK, PUT OUT FLAMES WITH BUCKET (NOT INCLUDED)

YOU ARE GOING TO READ SOMETHING WHICH IS CURRENTLY BURNING!

Keep your hands in your lap at all times! No one accepts any responsibility for any injuries you will pick up, due to this page

NO REALLY! You could die!

FINE, IF YOU WANT TO DIE, YOU STUPID BASTARD!

DAMN YOU!!!

You're going to die, how does that feel? You'll probably burn in hell! But do I care? NO! Because I warned you!

THIS PAGE HAS NOT PASSED HEALTH AND SAFETY STANDARDS!

This Page Has Not Passed International Health and Safety Standards
This may be for a number of reasons. This article could have a weak structure, or could contain hazardous substances. It may also be ON FIRE!

The Webpage You Are Currently Viewing is HIGHLY Flammable.
PLEASE DO NOT SMOKE! SWITCH ALL ELECTRICAL DEVICES OFF NOW!

OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT NOTICE

This Page Is EVIL And Enjoys Burning!
DO NOT TOUCH!

THIS PAGE IS HAZARDOUS!
It's Owner Can Accept No Responsibility For Any Harm Or Injury Inflicted By This Page.

THIS PAGE CONSTITUTES A FIRE!

DO NOT TOUCH!
Touching This Page With Any Part Of The Body Will Result In A Burning Sensation. This Is Known As Burning. If You Experience Burning Please Cycle To Your Local Doctors Immediately.

This article is very much like this bus, because it's on fire, but it isn't really a bus, as such...

This man has put this article down the toilet to try and put the fire out, but it isn't working, because THIS ARTICLE IS ON FIRE!

This page is a page which is on fire. That means that this whole page is currently burning, yes it's actually burning as you read these very words. We did warn you, you may have noticed a few notices on the way in? Yeah, there were a few... Well, anyway, all that matters now is that you're here. It is very likely that you might just die in the flames or from smoke inhalation, but if you're lucky you may escape.

No one really knows what this page used to be about, all they know is that it is currently ON FIRE! It may well have been a page about busses or toilets or signs, but we probably will never know. But there is one thing we do know and that's this is a page. Also this page happens to be on fire. Also you happen to be reading this. Also this page has NOT been fitted with a fire alarm. You could try ringing the fire service, but that's just a silly idea. We have no phone and how are firewomen (or men, I guess) going to get into a webpage? I wish you would think, sometimes.

Do not try to be cool like this tiger and jump through the flames. This tiger is cool, you're not cool, remember that before you do anything Hollywood style.

This idiot has swallowed this article, but he's going to die now because this article IS ON FIRE!

You Now Have Three Options, No This Isn't One Of Those Stupid Text Games, It's Real Life...

1. Continue reading this page - Don't worry I'll think up some rubbish for you to continue reading, no, don't worry, it's not a problem.
2. Shoot yourself - Given the circumstances this would be wholly appropriate, to have such a bitchy and annoying article whinging on at you, well...
3. Go to another page on Uncyclopedia which isn't on fire - Go ahead, be my guest there are a lot of funny pages out there!

Rubbish For You To Read If You Wish To Continue To Read This Article Which Is On Fire

Herrings - One of the pillars of modern society. "Modern Society" - One of the pillars of herrings. Herrings are a noble race, a fine race, they breed and are happy. They live together and they whinge together. Many scientists have likened them to human beings. If you examine the two species carefully you will notice many similarities: for example both can swim, both breathe, both have hearts, both can break-dance while holding a herring and a copy of the YMCA song on CD. Herrings, however, have recently gone into decline as they are hunted for use in the dildo industry.

Hmm... writing coherent rubbish for people to read is actually quite a hard task! Well I'll have to scrap that idea, instead you'll have to pretend to continue to read rubbish, I'll just hit "enter" a couple of times so there's some space.

You can't pretend? Well you've got a bloody lousy imagination then, haven't you? Try and imagine herrings swimming all over the page and letters and stuff like that. It's not that hard to pretend. I would copy and paste a Wikipedia article in here but I can't get out, what with the flames. Back to pressing enter, I guess...

*cough*

*splutter*

Wow, there really is quite a bit of smoke in here....

*cough* *cough*

*splutter*

THE END Go on, clear off or wait for fate. Personally I don't mind, but if you're going to wait here, please just read a book or something, OK? I have a lot of work to be getting on with. You can take a seat at the back, there. Good. *cough*

ATTENTION! This person is terrible. Please suggest ways he can better himself.