User:Enzo Aquarius/2007 Wikipedia hurricane season

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The 2007 Wikipedia hurricane season is an ongoing meteorological event relating to hurricanes and tropical storms in the calendar year of 2007 (Wikipedia Year 6) directly affecting the The Free Kingdom of Wikimedia, namely the estate of Wikipedia. It officially started on June 2, 2007 and ends on November 1, 2007, as limited by President Jimbo Wales.

The 2007 hurricane season is a record holder, in that it is the first time two category 5s and a category 6 hurricane made landfall on Wikipedia in a row. This created massive amounts of server damage and clogs on Job Queue Street, one of Wikipedia's main streets. Additionally, Hurricane Hinoa is the fastest developing system in history, forming near Wikimedia and making landfall as a hurricane less than a day later near the Deletion Dump.

Seasonal Forecasts[edit | edit source]

Seasonal forecasts for Wikipedia hurricane seasons are made early each year by the Wikipedia Avionic Weather Agency (WAWA). Due to the quiet nature of the previous year (apart from Hurricane Jordanhill), they predicted a more active than normal hurricane season. NOAA predicted only five named storms, but, after Hurricane Flammable, they backed out saying "you're on your own".

Storms[edit | edit source]

Subtopical Storm Angela[edit | edit source]

Subtopical Storm Angela
Angela.JPG AngelaTrack.JPG
Duration: May 9, 2007 - May 11, 2007
Intensity: Not Trotsky-Tough (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Subtopical Storm Angela

On May 9, a previously extratropical storm organized into Subtopical Storm Angela off the coast of Jimbo Wale's cottage in northern Wikipedia. Topical storm watches were immediately issued for parts of northern coastal Wikipedia and parts of Wikisource, though were later dropped upon further reconnaissance from WAWA's Hurricane Hunter 'The Citation Needed' group. It is the first named storm to be named after a member of the Wikipedia Parliament since Hurricane Florence in the 2003 Wikipedia hurricane season, and the first pre-season storm since Topical Storm Nupedia in April 2001. Later, the organization of the system deteriorated with a significant decrease in convection caused by the irregular shape of the Estate of Wikipedia as it moved over cooler interior waters and, on May 10, it weakened to a subtropical depression and WAWA issued its final advisory on Angela at 11 PM WST, May 10. However, on the morning of May 11 convection flared up over the center, indicating that the cyclone might be acquiring tropical characteristics once again. Editors, annoyed by this occurrence, set up an article called "Angela Be Gone". Before the administrators could delete the article as "Fan cruft", Angela dissipated.

Jimbo Wale's cottage suffered minor shingle damage, while five articles were destroyed. The Wikipedia Parliament brought up the idea to organized a Conservation week effort to recover the lost articles. At a cost of $10 million (USD), the effort was denied and the following locations were left to be recreated at Wikipedia inhabitants' expenses: A Corporated, The Wikimedia Foundation, Brig Town, WikiSex and The Train Surfing Club.

Topical Storm Braydie[edit | edit source]

Topical Storm Braydie
BraydieStorm.JPG BraydieTrack.JPG
Duration: June 1, 2007 - June 1, 2007
Intensity: I'll Be At The Bar (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Topical Storm Braydie

On May 30, a broad low pressure area formed in the Gulf of Wikipe-tan, west of Wikipedia. Moving northward slowly, Braydie deepened as it moved through the northeastern Wikipe-tan. On June 1, this system organized into Topical Storm Braydie, named after WAWA employee Braydie (claims that it was named after Wayne Brady are false). Despite being located in an area of high article flow, warnings were immediately issued along the western Wikipedian coastline. Braydie provided much-needed rain to parts of The Community Portal and The Stars of Wikipedia. Braydie made landfall near the village of The Community Portal late June 1 as a minor topical storm. It continued on north towards over territories in Wikiland, providing rain to Wikimedia and Wikispecies. No articles were affected by Braydie, although numerous meetings concerning the Report on Lengthy Litigation were stalled.


Topical Storm Codeine[edit | edit source]

Topical Storm Codeine
CodeineStorm.JPG CodeineTrack.JPG
Duration: July 1, 2007 - August 1, 2007
Intensity: Russian Revolution? What Revolution? (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Topical Storm Codeine

An area of high pressure developed into a low pressure system near Wikinews on July 1, and slowly organized while moving to the north-north-northeastwest. Late on July 1, it was upgraded to a tropical depression, the third of the season, and the 500th in record.

On July 3, the system strengthened into a topical storm north of Wikiquote, the first in nearly 6 years. It became extratropical-withfries on July 23rd as it tracked towards the Wikicommons over the cooler waters of east Wikiland.

On August 1, flooding was reported from Placenta, Wikicommons to the capital city of "Bytopic", where about 10 mm (0.5 inches [I think]) of rain caused the postponement of the Commons Frontal Nudity Contest. Up to 1 mm (0.01 inches) of rain fell in the Media area, causing massive problems with the city's sound systems. The most serious flooding was across the southern Anime, where dozens of anime art pieces were washed out, hair styles were flooded above their bases and several communities were isolated by large mechas. Ferry service between Commons and Wikiquote was suspended, and one ferry was diverted to Canada, 10000 miles away.


Hurricane Dynorod[edit | edit source]

Hurricane Dynorod
DynorodStorm.JPG DynorodTrack.JPG
Duration: August 12, 2007 - August 32, 2007
Intensity: Stalin-esque (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Hurricane Dynorod

A pompous topical wave moved off the east coast of Mexico in the second week of August. It organized itself and formed into a high on August 12 after passing a marijuana field, then turning into a low the next morning. Tropical Depression Fore formed on August 14 in the western Wikian from a topical wave to the south of Cape Wikia. The depression was expected to strengthen significantly over the following days due to increasing heat caused by increased editing on Wikipedia, warming sea surface temperatures which created conditions favorable for tropical intensification. The depression moved briskly eastward, north of The Island of the Damned, setting a direct course for mainland Wikipedia.

Based on satellite images and QuikSPAT data, the depression was upgraded to Topical Storm Dynorod on August 15. The storm continued to strengthen overnight as it gained organization, and on August 16 it was upgraded to the first hurricane of the 2007 Wikipedia hurricane season.

On August 17, the eye of Dynorod passed into the Wikipe-tan between the The Island of the Damned and Wikipedia as a Category 2 hurricane. In the warm waters of the Wikipe-tan, Dynorod rapidly strengthened into a Category 4 hurricane, slowly approaching Wikipedia.

WAWA upgraded Dynorod to Category 5 status late on August 25 and, at that strength, made landfall on the east coast of Wikipedia near Recent Changes on August 31.[3 Dean weakened to a category one storm while going through Wikipedia.


Hurricane El Hormiguero[edit | edit source]

Hurricane El Hormiguero
ElHormiguero.jpg HormigueroTrack.JPG
Duration: September 4, 2007 - September 9, 2007
Intensity: Tsar Bomba (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Hurricane El Hormiguero

Forming from a topical wave off of the east coast of Canada on September 4th, it continued south through the United States as a Tropical Depression before attaining Hurricane status over Kentuckistan. On September 7nd, El Hormiguero reached the Gulf of Mexico, taking a quick turn to the east, strengthening to a Category 6 hurricane after merging with a system low from Barcelona, then striking the west coast of Wikipedia on September 9th. At least 133 editors disappearances are being attributed to El Hormiguero, almost two thirds of the populace.

Wikipedia enthusiasts have considered El Hormiguero to be the love-child of Hurricane Katrina and Hurricane Dean.


Hurricane Flammable[edit | edit source]

Hurricane Flammable
FlammableStorm.JPG FlammableTrack.JPG
Duration: August 31, 2007 - September 10, 2007
Intensity: Stalin-esque (Tom Mayfair Scale)
Main article: Hurricane Flammable

On August 31, an area of weather east of the Wikicommons became organized enough, and was named Tropical Depression Sixty Six point Six. Early on September 1, it was upgraded to a topical storm and named Flammable, after it destroyed a flammable container of oxygen. Later that day, Flammable was upgraded to a category 1.0 hurricane. On September 2, Flammable was upgraded to a major general hurricane. It rapidly intensified into a Category 5 storm by the end of the evening, nearly reaching Category 6, and after briefly weakening to Category 4 status Flammable again restrengthened to Category 5, then weakening to Category 3 after going over a boat of anti-heat foam. After passing that, it restrengthened to a Category 5, after strengthening to a Category 4 hurricane. It struck northeastern Wikipedia with winds of 260 km/h (??? miles/ms) on September 9. It rapidly weakened over land after anti-hurricane protesters threw fire extinguishers at the system.

Hurricane Flammable set records for largest hurricane in the season, passing Hurricane El Hormiguero. Although the hurricane was large and long, it didn't cause as much damage as earlier storms in the season.



OH SHIT, IT'S A HURRICANE!

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