User:JesterCW/Seven Years' War

Six-Year, Eight-Month, Four-Week, One-Day Long, Seven Years' War
Date May 17, 1756- February 15, 1763 (6 years, 8 months, 4 weeks, 1 day) Location America, Other America, South America, North America, Europe, Europe 2, Africa Lite, Asia West, Everywhere else Territorial changes Great Britain and Spain to steal half of North America each, starting a contest now known as "Who Can Have The Most Revolutions?" (Great Britain loses, only having one.)
Belligerents
Great Britain ( Prussia	File:22px-Flag of Austria.png Hapsburgs (took over some land in the HRE but couldn't actually fight due to hemophilia). France (built dumb little forts in the Midwest which were set on fire). Kingdom of Spain (got sieged in Cuba by the British Navy).
Commanders and leaders
George II # George III Mr. India Guy Who Got Killed By His Own Country # Georgie Boy Frederick the Mediocre Prince Henry Joseph I	Louis XV The Medic Frenchman With A Cough Elizabeth of Russia
Strength
Enough to beat France, I guess.	*Equal to Britain and Prussia 800,000,000 Hapsburgs
Casualties and losses
Military dead: Kingdom of Prussia: 180,000 Great Britain: 160,001 Spain: Unknown, I can't read Spanish numbers, but I'm sure it's a few Other casualties: Great Britain: Their Entire National Wealth Total dead: <340,001 (1 because of George II)	Military dead: France: 200,000/3 (one-third because the French-Human ratio is 3:1) Hapsburgs: 140,000 (mostly hemophilia) Russian Empire: 120,000 Spain: Unknown, I can't read Spanish numbers Sweden: 28,000 meatballs Other Casualties: France: Most of their money but not as much as Great Britain Total dead 513,003.141592654... (approx.)

The Seven Years' War was a hastily-written novel by Margaret Thatcher designed to capitalize off of the United Kingdom's obsession with old-timey colonialist imagery. By the time of its release in 1974, the country had already moved on from the fad of colonostalgia that existed during the late-1960s. At the time, the book was bashed for its glorification of war in all its forms, and for its depiction of French people.

Over time, the book gained a cult following and is considered to be one of the earliest works in the World War franchise.

The novel would get a film adaptation in 1763 via time travel.

Summary

Following the most Italian thing ever done since the Schism, pretty much all of Europe got new friends following a foreign exchange where everyone's phones were swapped. What came to be known as the Seven Years' War began with the neighborhood squabblings of Britain and France (no surprise there,) which escalated into a full-on court case (Great Britain v. France, 1756) which ruled in favor of Great Britain following a brief but notable Six-Year, Eight-Month, Four-Week, One-Day long conflict involving both them and most of Europe; in turn, becoming what we know as the Seven Years' War. That name, however is a complete lie, as we don't know where the extra 2 months and 29 days came from.

Table of Contents

Chapter I: The Fellowships of the Qing

If you've ever been to a social event, you know almost nobody there. However, everyone in Europe had been very familiar with each other when they attended a fan meet and greet together for the Qing Dynasty in 1756. Following a minor scuffle between two nameless nations, everyone's phones became shuffled around, including their contacts. Now nobody knows who is who anymore.