Forum:On Conservapedia's Commandments and How We Can Adopt Them To Betterfy Uncyclopedia

Forums: Index > Village Dump > On Conservapedia's Commandments and How We Can Adopt Them To Betterfy Uncyclopedia

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according to conservapedia's commandments, posting obscenity or otherwise vandalizing conservapedia is punishable by up to ten years in jail. surely this is a system we should adopt? we could be much funnier as a site if we simply jailed those who opposed us... SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:08, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

Jesus. I don't technically believe that rules are there to be broken, but when the rules are that stupid, I'm certainly very tempted. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 18:56, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

well, i have been banned from conservapedia for being a liberal vandal, due to my edit here, which i thought might provoke an actual conversation. i assume the paddywagon is on the way to pick me up, so that's it for me, i'll see you in 2019. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 19:03, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

I like how it implies that they know, deep down, that they are rather out of date. Conservatives will be conservatives. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 19:09, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

That post was sooo liberal man, no wonder they banned you. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 20:09, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

The guy that undid your "vandalism" (which distorts the word to the point where it has no meaning) has a userbox on his userpage that says Freedom of speech can be dangerous, but must be upheld by every one of us. I think that broke my irony meter. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:28, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

You're all liberally biased. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 00:32, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

That's it! I'm taking away your guns! (ps: Here's your coupon for a free gay marriage) Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:37, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

But I didn't choose to be gay! And you take a step closer to the guns, I'm gonna be starting some shootan' up! ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 00:48, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

Well I'm still on Conservapedia (Now with block rights!). I am slightly tiring of the whole thing though. mAttlobster. (hello) 12:56, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

The statute that theyre using is for physical harassment , or as I like to call IRL harassment. Its inapplicable to websites and internet in general, and courts have already ruled as such. Considering that IP's almost never resolve to the correct user anyway(routing,open wifi networks etc), Conservapedia is just pumping hot air out of its distended anus. Its just your average conservative misunderstanding of reality--Nytrospawn 20:02, 25 February 2009 (UTC)

Granted, this is pretty much off-topic, but...

My favourite Conservapedia edit: The Daily Show, where Aschlafly (who is someone important on Conservapedia) removed some facts because they didn't fit the pre-chosen conclusion. It's thinking like that that got us into Iraq. True story. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:25, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

yea, aschlafly (proununciation: douchebag) is the founder and head nutjob there.he's currently promoting such forward thinking as 'girls are 75% as smart as boys'. their article on us claims that we have extreme liberal bias, but the article on wendy's new chicken sandwich claims the same, so i wouldn't read too much into it. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 14:54, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

But girls are smarter than boys. They can multitask (that's where one task is done at the same time as another task which is also being done). Boys just hit stuff. Sometimes, when their fists get tired they make farting sounds with their armpits.

Also: Uncyclopedia! The on-line encyclopedia that people who believe in birth control and not taking Gen1 literally can edit! (Now with Extreme Liberal Bias!) Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 19:41, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia: LIBERAL TO THE EXTREME! - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 00:40, Feb 27

The way Schlafly boldly takes command of the situation no matter what obstacles get in the way makes me all hot and bothered. I wonder if he's single? Or maybe his brother? His brother's page has been protected to prevent liberal bias, so I never know what's going on with him these days. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 04:01, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

As a Republican...

I am ashamed in all of you. May you all repent, lest thou be smited. (in the background) *Amen!* • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 03:27, Feb 26

Get a job, you hippy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 15:09, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, he sounds like a RINO. Get out of the Republicans, RINO! Go vote Green and smoke some of "the drugs", longhair! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 19:43, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

You're one of those uneducated layabouts that watch The Daily Show, aren't you? IronLung 20:28, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

Obviously. Normally, though, I end up missing it because I'm so "high" on "the drugs" that I'm out "stealing" "welfare". Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:58, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

You sir owe me a new keyboard. -OptyC Sucks! CUN22:11, 26 Feb

Rather than let the Free Market compete, I'll get the Socialist Obama government to start a program to get you a new keyboard. This will happen, of course, after all private keyboard companies in America (both of them) are nationalized. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:20, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

They don't like Britainland!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(((((((

They're mean!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 22:19, 26 February 2009 (UTC)

Well, yeah, but who really does? -OptyC Sucks! CUN22:25, 26 Feb

Yeah... I'm gonna go and quote a British user from the above debate: "But if it wasn't for us Brit's you lot wouldn't even have Computers!". Have at ye! ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 00:01, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

Just remember that it was the Americans that made them work reliably (and the Japanese that made them cheap). Britain may have invented the gun, but American made it kick ass! Woo! Go America! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:06, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh yeah!? Well the British invented slavery and sold people to America and grew fat on the profits! Woo! Go lack of morals! America may have invented obesity, but we invented sports! Go team! We invented killing! ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 00:17, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

What about Canadians?! Oh, never mind. • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 16:22, Feb 27

Brits might of invented the computer, but Americans invented the Internet and the Japanese filled it with tentacle rape porn Aizmov 21:51, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

Hey we don't like England or the UK either because we make fun of them. Brits only invented the Analytical Engine that didn't work, and IBM was the one that worked out all of the analytical engine bugs in it. Modern computers are based off the EDVAC or Von Neumann architecture. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 23:58, 3 March 2009 (UTC)

I was afraid you were going to say you hated England but liked the UK. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 00:46, 4 March 2009 (UTC)

Well maybe not Ireland, because I like Lucky Charms cereal and the color green, and maybe not the UK, and maybe not England but Lessor Britain is where I draw the line! --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 04:04, 4 March 2009 (UTC)

Rep. of Ireland isn't part of the UK. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 10:08, 4 March 2009 (UTC)

Don't go getting all truthy on us. This isn't Conservapedia. We thrive on outright lies, rather than partial truths. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 10:13, 4 March 2009 (UTC)

We publish only untruths here unlike Conservapedia, so that Ireland is a part of the UK if we say so. Maybe I thought Scotland? Is that the place the Highlander is from that chops off heads and yells "There can be only one!" We even claim that Mediocre Britain is a part of the UK as well. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 01:02, 5 March 2009 (UTC)

OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

Certain aspects of this page have incurred Her Majesty's displeasure and one may be well advised to consider judicious editing.

---

The highlander in question is actually from Somerset. There is a town there that is the source of the "off with their heads" faux-phrases (which are actually Scottish, neither Henry VIII or the concurrent Queen said such a thing), called Inverburgh. I've been there a few times myself. Mediocre Britain holds some truth in Kent too, but I've not been to Kent. ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 18:36, 5 March 2009 (UTC)

England was the USA's last ally until Obama upset them. He gave Gordon Brown 25 DVDs set to the USA region in NTSC so he couldn't play them and gave back the bust of Winston Churchill that England gave George W. Bush after 9/11 saying we didn't really need it. Plus Hillary Clinton gave Putin a red reset button marked "Overcharge" in Russian instead of "Reset". I think Obama will make us a few more new enemies that used to be allies. Piss them all off, why don't you with that Obamamagic(TM) of Hope and Change? --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 17:29, 10 March 2009 (UTC)

Hey, my hockey team just last week beat a team from Somerset! Do you by any chance live simultaneously on two continents at once? - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:18, Mar 12

Well I did go to Birmingham recently for a lovely evening of Hadyn, Mozart and Beethoven, and I realised that there's a Birmingham in Alabama and I was like, "Whoa dude!" ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 16:36, 12 March 2009 (UTC)

Rewrite

I recently made an account on Conservapedia (you know me, what with my Republicanism and all) and petitioned to rewrite the sorry, sorry article on us. I await their judgement. • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 16:30, Mar 12

Hey guys! I've got the go-ahead! No wai! • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 16:37, Mar 12

Good luck - now you will find out: you may be Republican, but are you Republican enough?! --UU - natter 16:40, Mar 12

The article was protected again. Apparently, JonathanC had a bus to catch... -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 20:29, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

ohhh, the great schlafly himself has appeared to weigh in on the issue! i heard he's so conservative, he has the ears and tail of an elephant. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 21:11, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

You're not fooling anyone, hippy. Plus, everyone knows that Mormons aren't right with Jesus, except in the run-up to Prop 8, when both them and Catholics were close enough. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:22, 12 March 2009 (UTC)

They allow nontrinitarians to edit Conservapedia?!?! What sort of theological liberals are they anyway? --Mnb'z 06:02, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

dude, your name is jonathan? you just totally blew my mind-hole. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 14:16, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

Is your name really Gerry? Also, "mind-hole." • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 15:13, Mar 13

well, my birthname is 'modus operandi', but my friends all call me 'gerry' for short. also, most of my friends don't speak latin. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:48, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

I thought it was Mbutu Mbontanatango! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:39, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

Seriously, is this some kind of joke?

Mystery : Why do non-conservatives exist? "They (liberals) pride themselves on doing well in school or reading the newspaper, can't accept that what they were taught was incorrect or biased. "[1]

Big dumb smarties with your dumb education and your stupid reading!

Goddamn Liberals, blindly accepting information despite it's bias and incorrectness

--CrabPope 00:21, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

"Use of mind-altering drugs, which encourages one to become a liberal to reconcile the cognitive dissonance, or dulls mental acuity resulting in mindless conformity." Dude. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:20, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

I can totally imagine a "liberal" trying to read a medical journal while gulping down vicodin in order to reconcile knowledge with his dissonant cognitive ability. This indeed makes a lot of sense. -- The Colonel (talk) 06:06, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

Medical journals are just liberal propaganda. Double-blind testing? Statistics? Facts? Pah! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 06:55, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

Seriously we need Why?:Why do Non-Conservatives Exist? as an article here. In fact, I think I'll start one and we can lampoon Conservapedia. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 03:39, 17 March 2009 (UTC)

Lampoon Conservapedia? Inconceivable! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:54, 17 March 2009 (UTC)

No, Lampoon Conservapedia? Unconceivable! --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 17:27, 17 March 2009 (UTC)