Fuddruckers
“Well look at us! Out for a fun family dinner. If anyone is watching, they'll say "Look at that family, look at how happy they are."”
“Well the kids do love Fuddruckers”
“You get to design any burger you want? Your only limit is your imagination! What kind did ya make for yourself, Chris?”
“Plain”
“Plain? What do you mean plain?”
“It's a plain burger. That's how I like them.”
“That's not a burger, that's just a meat sandwich. At least Meg went wild and got a beige burger.”
“No, I got chicken”
“What? Here? This is Fuddruckers! What part of Fuddruckers don't ya understand?”
“All of it!”
“All right, let's start this again. You're all gonna get up, go back up to that toppings bar, and go nuts!”
“But it tastes good like this”
“It's not supposed to taste good, it's supposed to look crazy! What the hell are you doing?”
“I'm cutting it. It's easier to eat.”
“It's not supposed to be easy to eat! Half of it is supposed to fall onto your plate when you squeeze it, and the rest goes onto your shirt.”
“How's everything going over here?”
“Terrible! Go away! See, look, now I have to be even more ridiculous to make up for what you guys aren't doing. Silverware? Put them on! Salt shaker? Whatever! Ice from soda, get on that burger!”
“Peter, people are staring”
“Yeah, they're saying, "Look at the creative guy, Look at King Fuddrucker over there." Usually you put a burger on a tray, this guy's putting a tray on a fucking burger!”
“Are you through Peter?”
“Not yet I'm not! Give me the car keys!”
“Peter!”
“Give me the car keys, THAT'S FUDDRUCKERS!”
“Peter, you've opened the trunk. People are pulling things out of our car.”
“Good! That's also Fuddruckers! Get used to it and prepare to fish my teeth out of my stool!”
“Peter, enough!”
“You guys clearly don't get it!”
“Well I'm sure when you explain what we're supposed to get, we'll get it”
“Those poor kids, those poor babies. Hey Chris, what you got there?”
“A plain burger”
“Looks good!”
