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User:EvilZak

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Redpentagram.png 		WARNING!

EvilZak is an

Evil Nazi Sysop



from Hell!



He always deletes crap pages right away, gives long bans, and uses vulgar language while doing so. Presumably, he also kicks puppies, eats live kittens, heils Hitler, and sacrifices children to the great lord Satan. 		Redpentagram.png
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THE LANGUAGES I SPEAK!!!!
and other trivial shit
Deletion Award.gif
This user is an administrator and messing with 'em could result in a ban.
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fh-3 This user is an advanced level of Fuckhead.
rh-P
This fucker speaks Random Humour heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
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en-P
This fucker speaks English heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
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sc-P
This fucker speaks Scrabble heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
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MW-P
This fucker speaks MediaWiki heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
MW-P
This fucker speaks Pikachu heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
ac-P
This fucker speaks those African clicky noises heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
ac-P
du-P
This fucker speaks Dumbass heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
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es-P
This fucker speaks Español heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
es-P
vl-P
This fucker speaks Valley girl heavily laced with profanity that would make a fucking asshole sailor blush from all the g*******d blasphemy.
vl-P
ow-3
This user has already read all of Oscar Wilde's works. Twice. And has his picture over their bed.
ow-3
Protein.GIF This user joined the Folding@home Team, but is going to use the project results to cause cancer rather than cure it.

“I'm going to fucking bury those guys, I've done it before, and I'll do it again. I'm going to fucking kill every Uncyclopedia user.”

- EvilZak

EvilZak is a global spy created by turkey manufacturers to destroy all ham. He walks the Earth, searching for mentions of ham and exclamation points to modify them for the evil turkey conspiracy. Saying HAM!!!!! will alert his superiors. They will send him to destroy the hamination, to maintain the turkey empire. He is known to be involved as a double agent for salami.

EvilZak attended this YKK klan rally. He's in the front row, second from the left.

He has extreme laziness.

He is also adamant in his hatred of all yous. Yous are inferior to all other members of the human race, and they should not even be counted as members themselves. He's even in the You Klux Klan.

THE ARTICLES!!!!

Articles that are featured are in bold, and articles that should have been featured are in normal style.

Also: User:EvilZak/Random ideas for an article

MORE ARTICLES!!!! THEY'RE NOT IN THE MAIN NAMESPACE!!!!

THE IMAGES!!!!

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PIECE OF CRAP WARNING!
These images are pieces of crap. The artist acknowledges this.

This is a gallery of the images he's done. The gallery is written in first person, unlike the rest of this page which is in third person. He has no fucking clue why that is. Featured images appear on someone else's user page.

  • HTML, what can't it do?

    HTML, what can't it do?

  • I wonder how much bandwidth I'm wasting with this picture.

    I wonder how much bandwidth I'm wasting with this picture.

  • I'm also capable of making TILTED RECTANGLES! YES, I SAID TILTED!

    I'm also capable of making TILTED RECTANGLES! YES, I SAID TILTED!

  • What the fuck was I smoking?

    What the fuck was I smoking?

  • This is better than the previous four combined, but still worse than one pixel by anyone else.

    This is better than the previous four combined, but still worse than one pixel by anyone else.

  • For this image, I moved an oval up, then moved a smaller oval up. Nothing short of serious laber.

    For this image, I moved an oval up, then moved a smaller oval up. Nothing short of serious laber.

  • Here I added a rectangle and some text. Hey, I told you I had extreme laziness.

    Here I added a rectangle and some text. Hey, I told you I had extreme laziness.

  • It's in black and white, so you can't see the faults as easily.

    It's in black and white, so you can't see the faults as easily.

  • To be fair, this is the best picture of a sharpened hamster I've ever seen.

    To be fair, this is the best picture of a sharpened hamster I've ever seen.

  • MSPaint is a good tool in the right hands. Too bad my hands aren't right.

    MSPaint is a good tool in the right hands. Too bad my hands aren't right.

  • A trophy. Notice that it is neither for excellent image editing nor given to me.

    A trophy. Notice that it is neither for excellent image editing nor given to me.

  • I made a typo on this image. Where I put "Signature-related human fatalities", I meant to say "EvilZak's image making talent".

    I made a typo on this image. Where I put "Signature-related human fatalities", I meant to say "EvilZak's image making talent".

  • At least I'm good at making images that are supposed to be revolting.

    At least I'm good at making images that are supposed to be revolting.

  • It's not easy being green. And even if it was, I'd still do it wrong.

    It's not easy being green. And even if it was, I'd still do it wrong.

THE ARTICLES HE LIKES BEST!!!!

(In case you weren't paying attention earlier, articles written by the man himself (that's EvilZak, in case you REALLY haven't been paying attention) are italicized.)

THE AWARDS!!!!

Holder of the Cub Scout Uncyclopedia Proficiency Badge


Newcookie.gif Somebody has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.
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Original Ninjastar
A token of appreciation for joining
and contributing to Folding@home –Todd Lyons
Newcookie.gif Todd Lyons has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

~ For 1000+ points contributed to Uncyclopedia:Folding@home. -- T. (talk) 12:10, 11 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Newcookie.gif mad paperclip has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.
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