Uncyclopedia:Wilde/S
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| Here you will find a repository of quotes from the Late, Great Oscar Wilde! | |
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Salvation Army
“The Salvation army is second to none.”
– Oscar Wilde on the Salvation Army
Santanism
“Santanism is the one, true religion, above all, which will definetly not make life easier”
– Oscar Wilde on Santanism
Samurai
“Samurai are honorable warriors. Which means they're pussies compared to Ninjas.”
– Oscar Wilde on Samurai
Sasquatch
“I like 'em hairy, but this is ridiculous!”
– Oscar Wilde on Sasquatch
Saxony1
“Cyrano de Bergerac? Let's see, sat he not upon the Queen Mother's knee in Saxony?”
– Oscar Wilde on Saxony
Saxony2
“Love her in the day-time, love her in the morning, love her all night long.
Love her in Saxony, love her in Cornwall, love her internally.”– Oscar Wilde on Saxony
Scissors
“I can never cut a line straight. This ought to be, for I never do anything straight.”
– Oscar Wilde on scissors
Sconed
“So in other words..a bored guy smacked his mate over the head with a scone and said "sucka got sconed" ?”
– Oscar Wilde on sconed
Scott Joplin
“Had I been alive when Scott Joplin wrote Maple Leaf Rag, I certianly would have participated in countless acts of sodomy while listening to it.”
– Oscar Wilde on Scott Joplin
Scuba
“There is nothing more stunning to mine eye than watching a dozen crows wheeling majestically under the water in search of clams.”
– Oscar Wilde on Scuba
Sega
“wtf n00b, go back to your gay nintendo, sega 4 teh win LOL”
– Oscar Wilde on Sega
SEHS
“Holy shit - that dude's head just blew off! Did ya see that? That was fucked up!”
– Oscar Wilde on SEHS
Sexism
“I remember when my dad gave me the father-son talk. It was so amazing, the way he said women should cook and clean, while men sit on their fat asses all day.”
– Oscar Wilde on Sexism
Shit
“This shit is epic.”
– Oscar Wilde on Shit
Skeet
“It is a black slang word and if white people knew what it meant they wouldn't play the song”
– Oscar Wilde on Skeet
Skeith
“That sucka tastes REEEAL good with grape jelly and beer.”
– Oscar Wilde on Terror of Death
Slashdot
“Netcraft confirms it - Slashdot is filled with linux fanboys.”
– Oscar Wilde on Slashdot
Sleep
“Sleep? I tried that once. It didn't do anything for me.”
– Oscar Wilde on Sleep
The Smartest Men of War
“When it comes to any kind of war, the smartest man stays neutral.”
– Oscar Wilde on War
Smuts Hall
“They are better than you (at networking washing machines), and they know it.”
– Oscar Wilde on Smuts Hall
Sneeze
“A hearty sneeze a day is Nature's way of propagating the joys of influenza”
– Oscar Wilde on Sneeze
Snoop Dogg
“Yo all you punk-ass niggas, bitches 'n hos, Snoop Dizzle be the shizzile, so don't be making me bust a cap in yo ass, by talkin trashizzle 'bout Snoop.”
– Oscar Wilde on Snoop Dogg
Sniper
“Don't be giving me none of that crazy razor bullcrap!”
– Oscar Wilde on Sniper
Snooking
“Snooking loopy nuts are we, me and 'im and them and me.”
– Oscar Wilde on Snooking
Soap opera
“If a man can not think of a better thing to do than watching that trash, then he is tired of life!”
– Oscar Wilde on Soap opera
Socks
“I like to go into a laundry mat, go to a finished dryer, and steal one sock.”
– Oscar Wilde on Socks
Softball
“Why do they call it softball? Isn't the ball just as hard as the ones they use in regular baseball?”
– Oscar Wilde on softball
Space Jam
“Who wants JAM from SPACE? I mean, it's just gross.”
– Oscar Wilde on Space Jam
Space-lizardmen
“They bit me man, they bit me. And it wasn't even a blowjob.”
– Oscar Wilde on Space-Lizardmen
Space Shuttle
“Why are the Americans so bad at Badminton? Only a Welshman could lose more shuttles than they have!”
– Oscar Wilde on the Space Shuttle
Stakeout
“Sometimes you must go outside the law to enforce it!”
– Oscar Wilde on Stakeout
Stalin
“You hear people say a lot of things about Stalin, but that was only after he was born.”
– Oscar Wilde on Stalin
Star Trek: Nemesis
“One Parisian model does not a summer make”
– Oscar Wilde on Star Trek: Nemesis
star wars
“Either that planet goes or I do”
– Oscar Wilde on Alderaan
Stavanger
“Sta-what?”
– Oscar Wilde on Stavanger
Steve Martin
“EXCUUUUSE MEEEE!”
– Oscar Wilde on the Steve Martin
Sudden Instant Death Syndrome
“I prefer to think of it as a 'surprise afterlife'.”
– Oscar Wilde on Sudden Instant Death Syndrome
Super AIDS
“As a noted bear masturbator and wit, I have long known that AIDS was none other than Super AIDS in glasses.”
– Oscar Wilde on Super_AIDS
Sweden
“Norweigan chicks are ugly. I mean c'mon, who wants to make out with a fucking Viking?!?!?!?”
– Oscar Wilde on Sweden
Sword of Omens
“The Excalibur ain't got nothing on the Sword of Omens!”
– Oscar Wilde on Sword of Omens
Sylvester Stallone
“Only the pessimist will judge wallpaper by genius in all things invisible. The exotic fruits know no bounds of ethical absolution.”
– Oscar Wilde on Sylvester Stallone