Uncyclopedia:Wilde/S
Salvation Army
“The Salvation army is second to none.”
Santanism
“Santanism is the one, true religion, above all, which will definetly not make life easier”
Samurai
“Samurai are honorable warriors. Which means they're pussies compared to Ninjas.”
Sasquatch
“I like 'em hairy, but this is ridiculous!”
Saxony1
“Cyrano de Bergerac? Let's see, sat he not upon the Queen Mother's knee in Saxony?”
Saxony2
“Love her in the day-time, love her in the morning, love her all night long.
Love her in Saxony, love her in Cornwall, love her internally.”
Scissors
“I can never cut a line straight. This ought to be, for I never do anything straight.”
Sconed
“So in other words..a bored guy smacked his mate over the head with a scone and said "sucka got sconed" ?”
Scott Joplin
“Had I been alive when Scott Joplin wrote Maple Leaf Rag, I certianly would have participated in countless acts of sodomy while listening to it.”
Scuba
“There is nothing more stunning to mine eye than watching a dozen crows wheeling majestically under the water in search of clams.”
Sega
“wtf n00b, go back to your gay nintendo, sega 4 teh win LOL”
SEHS
“Holy shit - that dude's head just blew off! Did ya see that? That was fucked up!”
Sexism
“I remember when my dad gave me the father-son talk. It was so amazing, the way he said women should cook and clean, while men sit on their fat asses all day.”
Shit
“This shit is epic.”
Skeet
“It is a black slang word and if white people knew what it meant they wouldn't play the song”
Skeith
“That sucka tastes REEEAL good with grape jelly and beer.”
Slashdot
“Netcraft confirms it - Slashdot is filled with linux fanboys.”
Sleep
“Sleep? I tried that once. It didn't do anything for me.”
The Smartest Men of War
“When it comes to any kind of war, the smartest man stays neutral.”
Smuts Hall
“They are better than you (at networking washing machines), and they know it.”
Sneeze
“A hearty sneeze a day is Nature's way of propagating the joys of influenza”
Snoop Dogg
“Yo all you punk-ass niggas, bitches 'n hos, Snoop Dizzle be the shizzile, so don't be making me bust a cap in yo ass, by talkin trashizzle 'bout Snoop.”
Sniper
“Don't be giving me none of that crazy razor bullcrap!”
Snooking
“Snooking loopy nuts are we, me and 'im and them and me.”
Soap opera
“If a man can not think of a better thing to do than watching that trash, then he is tired of life!”
Socks
“I like to go into a laundry mat, go to a finished dryer, and steal one sock.”
Softball
“Why do they call it softball? Isn't the ball just as hard as the ones they use in regular baseball?”
Space Jam
“Who wants JAM from SPACE? I mean, it's just gross.”
Space-lizardmen
“They bit me man, they bit me. And it wasn't even a blowjob.”
Space Shuttle
“Why are the Americans so bad at Badminton? Only a Welshman could lose more shuttles than they have!”
Stakeout
“Sometimes you must go outside the law to enforce it!”
Stalin
“You hear people say a lot of things about Stalin, but that was only after he was born.”
Star Trek: Nemesis
“One Parisian model does not a summer make”
star wars
“Either that planet goes or I do”
Stavanger
“Sta-what?”
Steve Martin
“EXCUUUUSE MEEEE!”
Sudden Instant Death Syndrome
“I prefer to think of it as a 'surprise afterlife'.”
Super AIDS
“As a noted bear masturbator and wit, I have long known that AIDS was none other than Super AIDS in glasses.”
Sweden
“Norweigan chicks are ugly. I mean c'mon, who wants to make out with a fucking Viking?!?!?!?”
Sword of Omens
“The Excalibur ain't got nothing on the Sword of Omens!”
Sylvester Stallone
“Only the pessimist will judge wallpaper by genius in all things invisible. The exotic fruits know no bounds of ethical absolution.”