Portal:Technology
 Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Technology portal Code Monkey's favorite page for computing, gadgets and machinations.
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When faced with a large group of similar looking people, the Slim-Shady Algorithm can be applied to deduce which member of the group is the authentic person whom you are seeking.
The algorithm is applied by simply announcing "Won't the real X please stand up" over and over again (where X denotes the name of the person you are seeking) until the real person stands up.
Running time: The algorithm runs in O(N) time, which makes it a linear-running algorithm.
A more complex version can achieve O(log N) efficiency, but this requires the use of a tree. Note that there is an overhead cost associated with cutting down the tree to get the log.
Known bugs: Many users report that the algorithm tends to become locked when making the announcement, refusing to accept any input...
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Some toasters come with the ability to burn CD-R and DVD-R, connected by a lightning fast USB 2.0.
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Did You Know...
Quote of the Day
“We have to stop optimizing for programmers and start optimizing for possible girlfriends.”
Highlighted Biography
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| Tesla seen here with his giant fan invention... |
Nikola Tesla (Serbian: Кицк Асс; 10 July 1856 – 7 January 1943) is one bad mofo and a god of electricity in Norse mythology. He is also a scientist, inventor and visionary. Worship him for you cannot win, he shall disarm all your petty weapons.
Early Life
Though commonly believed to be human, Nikola Tesla was actually born through a small discharge of static electricity caused by his mother rubbing up against the local pizza delivery boy during a lightning storm, or at least that's what she told Tesla's father. Another lesser known theory claims that he actually was hired to construct himself by his father in the summer of 1883 for 5$ per hour. The story has it that Tesla had already been working on plans for himself in secret for several years so was able to start right away.…
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Technology Spotlight
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| Artist's depiction of a cookie clicker. |
A cookie clicker is a tool designed specifically in order to "click" cookies, punching holes into them. Cookie clickers, since their initial invention in the 1970s, have been used for a variety of purposes in the kitchen, including clicking cookies (their original purpose), making cucumber and steak skewers, and making ring-shaped dessert toppings.
A typical cookie clicker has a long lever which is used to push a bladed cylinder, the clicker, straight through cookies up to 1/2 an inch in thickness, and then through a close-fitting hole in the die. As the vertical travel distance of the cylinder is less than an inch, it can be positioned within about 1.2 inches of the lever fulcrum. For smaller cookie clickers, meant to slice through thinner, Subway-style cookies, the resulting lever need not be more than 3 inches for sufficient force.
The clicker's diameter generally varies between each clicker; a hole size of 1/4 inch allows for a a donut-shaped 3/4-to-1 inch cookie, whilst a 1/2 inch hole is generally favored for medium-sized cookies. Occasionally, a 1-inch hole is used for larger cookies and other foodstuffs (such as steak).
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