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Please take part in the logo discussion at Forum:Un-Bestiary needs logo.

In case you were unclear by the intro, the purpose of this page is to compile a collection of the creatures of Uncyclopedia (Grues, kittens, stuff like that). I encourage any Users that stumble upon this page to add to it, as one man cannot do it alone, and neither will I try. Group project! Faaaabulous! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 17:28, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

Also, note that any creatures featured on this page must be added to Category:UnBestiary automatically, before Uncyclopedian gets on your ass about it.

Contributors to this page:





This is great: barely two hours old, this article is, and we already have 15+ entries from 6 different people. I thought for sure it would have been NRV'd instead. Keep it up, slaves! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 19:47, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

It's 17 entries. Uncyclopedian 19:57, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

Well, when I wrote that it was 15. I knew there'd be more, so I added the "+". --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:04, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

Look in Category:Monsters for more to add. Uncyclopedian 19:52, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

Category:Animals is a good place to search, too. You'd be surprised what people put there. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:05, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

20+ entries! Good Work, and DiZ has been eaten by a grue. Uncyclopedian 20:39, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

Category:Monsters is good, but what about Category:Monster? Or, for that matter, Template:Monster? --L 08:48, 7 July 2006 (UTC)


I've made two new Userboxes for people who frequent this hellhole of a page. Come and get 'em!

Sugar Glider Attack.jpg This User is a zookeeper at the Un-Bestiary. Don't mind the smell.

Domokunyellownbackground.jpg This User has been officially punished on Un-Bestiary. Learn from their mistakes and don't get flogged.

The names are {{User Bestiary}} and {{User Punished}} in case you're going to use them. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:40, 6 July 2006 (UTC)

I made a new userbox for this page:

{{User Never Punished}} =

Blackknight.jpg This User has never been punished on Un-Bestiary. Learn from their actions and act like them.

Uncyclopedian 18:16, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Anyone is allowed to edit it. Uncyclopedian

No Plagiarism![edit]

Guys, I have to speak out against what I'm seeing on the Un-Bestiary. Don't copy-and-paste the first paragraph of an article and stick it on the creature's entry. That way, all we're doing is making a list of plagiarized animal introductions. The purpose is to summarize the whole article in one paragraph. You know, the finer points of the subject and such. Thank you. In fact, I'm making that a rule, and punishing Uncyclopedian for it. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 15:30, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Can't be punished for something that happened before the rule. Uncyclopedian 15:31, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

The rule is active in retrospect, so yes, you can.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I MUST HAVE MY PLAGARISM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 15:39, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Unix Daemons not plagarized. Uncyclopedian 15:44, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

I'm just saying, not that you're the only offender, but lots of other articles are copied word-for-word. I'm going back and fixing them up a little. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 15:47, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Also, Ghelae is getting fed to a grue. No complaining about rules. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 15:49, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

*kills DiZ before grue is fetched* ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 15:55, 7 July 2006 (UTC)
Bites Ghelae on neck. Then cockpunches Uncyclopedian. Rules are in retrospect! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:01, 7 July 2006 (UTC)
<blocks punch with Ghelae> Uncyclopedian 16:02, 7 July 2006 (UTC)
Uncyclopedian can't be affected by XYZZY. Ghelae can't be affected by XYZZY.

DiZ, act like someone your age. No biting people. I have to punish you for that.

Grounding is NOT a punishment. Feed me to a Grue instead.

SAVE THE SUGARGLIDER (article, not the animal)[edit]

As some of you have noticed, Savethemooses deleted the Sugarglider article for crappy reasons. So, if you believe the sugarglider is bent on world domination, and you think Savethemooses is working for the sugargliders, then go tell Savethemooses how you feel! Get that page reinstated! Alcarcalimo 21:29, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

New template[edit]

I'm thinking: should we make a new template to put on articles that have been included in the bestiary? Here is an example (done in raw code), feel free to mutilate edit it:

I think the sugarglider should be our mascot. Anyways, wat doo u thinke? (about a Template, not the sugarglider) Don't anyone make it until we have enough support. No one wants another useless template floating about. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:37, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Something more general of the Un-Bestiary. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 16:27, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Like what? Not a badger, I hope.
No, not a badger. But not a sugarglider either. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 16:35, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Fine G, when you come up with a better mascot than the proud sugarglider, let us know. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:39, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Below I explained that we should "wait until the UB afinni" before we choose a mascot. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 16:49, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Retard newbie question (I should be above this by now): that means what exactly? --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:22, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
You wouldn't understand. "Affini" is from French (it means "has finished"), and as you know, nobody speaks that. UB is short for "Un-Bestiary" (which I thought would've been obvious). It saves me from having to repetitively type it out all the time. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 07:20, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
I knew what you meant by UB, it was pretty obvious. But no, I didn't know what affini meant, I don'ts speak ze Frenchy.--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 13:50, 10 July 2006 (UTC)

As soon as we choose a mascot, I'm making this template. But I'm keeping the sugarglider on it, since it goes with the joke. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 13:50, 13 July 2006 (UTC)

Guys, the template hasbeen created. Template:UnBestiary. We now need to find slaves to place it on every article included here. Also, we still need a mascot and logo. I vote for this:


--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:41, 14 July 2006 (UTC)

I'll put it around. Uncyclopedian

Darn it, it's getting deleted by MoneySign, because I put it around. Uncyclopedian

Indeed it did. Now then, DON'T DO THAT AGAIN! Seek legal counseling for any further to-be-rejected projects in the future. I thank you kindly. --~ sin($) tan() 23:58, 14 July 2006 (UTC)
The category I don't mind as much, but that template is fugly and unnecessary. I should probably delete it, but I'm too lazy to do so right now. —Sir Major Hinoa [TALK] [KUN] 02:50, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
Personally, I don't mind that it was deleted, but we need to make sure it's removed from all the pages Uncyc put it on. We can still have a logo, no?--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 13:19, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
We need to make sure?? What, you doubt an admin's competence? Not to worry, my furry friend. Rest assured all the applications of such a template have been removed. As for the logo: aye, you may keep your visual ambassador. 't Is of no use to us as a mere log of deletion. --~ sin($) tan() 13:42, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
Then could thou helpeth with the formatting? Is there a way we can get it to appeareth on the top-left corner like the Potato Logo? Or art the logo too inferior too passeth the infernal test of the Top-Left Corner? Fear the TLC!!--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 14:40, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
I will not aid you with any formatting (as you made the danged logo yourself). As for the placing it where otherwise the potato would appear: this is only possible were "Un-Beastiary" its own namespace. Which it is not, and we can all pray will never be. ^_^ --~ sin($) tan() 20:36, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
Actually, it's quite possible... no matter how much Money wishes it weren't. Read my response on the Forum page. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 20:11, 17 July 2006 (UTC)

Need the rest of the letters... Especially an X[edit]

So yeah, fill 'em in. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 22:50, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

I don't think there are any X's. If you can find one, good for you. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 22:53, 7 July 2006 (UTC)

Never mind, I found Xenomorph. OH GOD, IT'S GOING TO KILL ME!!! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:47, 8 July 2006 (UTC)


Does anyone want an Un-Bestiary logo? If so, what do you want as the logo? Uncyclopedian 14:45, 8 July 2006 (UTC) , or some variant of it. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 15:13, 8 July 2006 (UTC)

I say an old looking book, with Un-Bestiary written in gold on the cover, and maybe a sugarglider somewere in the logo. Uncyclopedian 15:22, 8 July 2006 (UTC)

Yes! Sugarglider!! I liked Ghelae's image, but the badger would look better if it was a.....bloodthirsty sugarglider! Bloodthirsty is always good. And change the name from UnSpecies to UnBestiary. That's what I'd go for. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:27, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Yes, bloodthirsty is good, but sugarglider... not so good. Let's wait until the UB afinni until we decide. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 16:36, 8 July 2006 (UTC)

I'd like to say as the creator of the bloodthirsty sugarglider, I wholly support it as the logo. I also want to know why the article on it was huffed, because that was a damn good article that had a lot of potential if I don't say so myself. Keep prodding me, I'll will rant and rave about the huffing for YEARS unless that article is reinstated! Alcarcalimo 17:49, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

If you know who huffed it, you can bitch about it on their Talk page. This is for discussion of Un-Bestiary. Oh, and take this mace and flail. Beat some sense into whoever killed the Sugarglider. On the other hand, my Fish Within A Fish Within A Fish Within A Fish Within Another Fish came back from VFD safe and sound. You should celebrate. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 21:10, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

Only Creatures Please![edit]

I just deleted Aidepolcycnu's entry from the Bestiary here. Now, I could take Euro-ipods and Wallets and such, cause they're actually referred to as creatures, but Aidepolcycnu is a "mirror-Universe". I didn't check who made it (probably Uncyclopedian), cause it's not that big a deal, but this is UnBestiary. For animals. And monsters. And other assorted beings. Not alternate dimensions. I don't want us to get overly promiscuous and lazy with our featured topics. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:37, 8 July 2006 (UTC)

I've placed a new rule about it now. ~ Ghelæ talkcontribs 16:40, 8 July 2006 (UTC)
Good. And turns out it was Uncyclopedian who made it. That falls under the jurisdiction of rule #4:(Thou shall only addeth creatures that inhabit the Kingdom of Uncyclopedia.) Aidepolcycnu is not a creature, and is the direct opposite of Uncyclopedia. Your punishment is being fed to furries. Also, RULES ARE ACTIVE IN RETROSPECT! --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:46, 8 July 2006 (UTC)

Spliced from the punishments[edit]

Look at the front page for the REAL punishments, Hinoa. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Uncyclopedian (talk • contribs)

Sign your edits, loser. And by the way, I say we just remove the punishments bit altogether. It's not funny, extrodinarily stupid, and it's getting on my nerves. Give me three damn good reasons why I should let it live. —Sir Major Hinoa [TALK] [KUN] 02:56, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
1. Enforces rules
It's called cleaning it up yourself, lazybones. H. 03:01, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
2. Keeps two userboxes usable
Whoop-dee-doo. H. 03:01, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
3. Important part of the article. Uncyclopedian 02:58, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
That's the least funny bit of it. H. 03:01, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
I agree. I was considering it ever since I realized how much power it gave Uncyclopedian to screw with my mind. HE MUST NOT BE ALLOWED TO HAVE SUCH POWER!!! I say let him deal cockpunches and grue torture in his own dreams. As a matter of fact, I think we have to many of those rules on the page. I'm thinking about merging or condensing some. 'Sides, if you wanna use the Userboxes, use 'em. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 03:04, 9 July 2006 (UTC)
I am going to keep the power by creating a user subpage and have a link to it on Un-Bestiary. HA! Uncyclopedian 14:08, 9 July 2006 (UTC)


Okay, everyone, LISTEN UP. From here on out, there are to be no "punishments." My theory was that the rules were meant to be followed, but the punishments were just there to be amusing. Therefore, any linking of the punishments to the main page, or any listing of them on this page, will be itself punished with three days' vacation for your first offense, six for your second, and so forth. (And no, this rule won't count prior infractions, else I'd have to ban Uncyclopedian for an additional 2 days and 23 hours.) Comprenden ustedes?RT. HON. HINOA, KNIGHT COMMANDER OF THE ORDER (BEG FOR MERCY) 06:10, 10 July 2006 (UTC)

Well, you know I've never been particularly into punishments, so you won't get any complaints from me. But what did you all think of the reformatting I did earlier today? (I thought it was rather spiffy myself!) Who knows, maybe we can finally replace "The Wilde Project" link on the Main Page.  c • > • cunwapquc? 06:18, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
Claro, Señor! And as for your reformatting, S.U., it sucked bat shit. Kidding, it's awesome. Now this page finally looks professional (to some extent --this is Uncyclopedia). Yes, I do think it might replace the Wilde Project, certainly there's enough of him around here. Un-Bestiary is the Bestiary of the future! Repent!!!--Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 13:57, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
By the way, what does it take for an article like this to be officially recognized as a "sister project" or something of the sort? --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 14:08, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
I now place the punishments in edit summaries, when I find something wrong like that rock problem.(DiZ forgot to give it a heading)Uncyclopedian 14:54, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
Ok, ok, no punishments, except on my user page(that had better not get me blocked)Uncyclopedian 15:01, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
Aha! Now I shall place a link on your talk page if you are punished, and it will link to the punishments.Uncyclopedian 15:11, 10 July 2006 (UTC)
<Punishment room explodes> Well, I'll stop with the punishments. DiZ, you are not flogged. Uncyclopedian 14:45, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
AAAAAAARRRGH!! THE FLOGGING!!!! Okay. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 14:56, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
Not flogged until the Punishment Room is rebuilt. Uncyclopedian
Would you mind rereading the beginning comment of this section, Uncyclopedian? I'm sure you've read it before; I just want to make sure you understand it. —Sir Major Hinoa [TALK] [KUN] 04:31, 13 July 2006 (UTC)
I have to admit, this insistence on the use of heavy B&D terminology in relation to an article about fanciful animals actually is somewhat disturbing.  c • > • cunwapquc? 05:16, 13 July 2006 (UTC)
And yet it is totally consistent with the rest of Uncyc! ^_^ —Sir Major Hinoa [TALK] [KUN] 05:20, 13 July 2006 (UTC)
Uncyclopedian, listen 2 your superiors. And yes, consistency is good. Confusing people.....very good. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 13:48, 13 July 2006 (UTC)
There is a grue behind you, ready to eat you, because it's an eurg, who will eat you, DiZ. Uncyclopedian
There is lunch in front of me, so the Eurg will have 2 wait. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 16:59, 13 July 2006 (UTC)


So, do I count, if I put in one thing? --Joe!/TALK/CONTRIBS/F@H 20:46, 15 July 2006 (UTC)

Yes. Uncyclopedian

Jimbo Wales, the Animal[edit]

Hey, I didn't want to do this, as I've not edited your animal collection yet, but would you guys maybe want to change out that Jimbo pic for any one of the thirty-seven others found on the article. I'm about to pull that pic off of the main article as well, based on the fact that the uploader admits that it is an image that comes from "that idiotic place that shant be named", and then proceeds to claim on their user page that said idiotic place is better than us. Given the recent spat of someone from their ranks vandalizing a shit-ton of articles here, the fact that we really shouldn't be associated with them in any way we don't have to be (obviously if they spork something from us there probably ain't much we can do about it) and merely the fact that the picture kinda sucks (maybe that's the point?), can't you substitute something else in there, say Image:Jimbo Vendetta.jpg for example? Just a thought. -- Imrealized ...hmm? 07:34, 22 August 2006 (UTC)

Personally, I like Image:JimboPimp.gif myself. But I do agree; that picture sucks and should be exterminated. Maj.png Major Sir Hinoa (Plead) (KUN) 18:35, 22 August 2006 (UTC)

I made an Un-Bestiary article[edit]

But I don't want to screw anything up, can someone fit this somewhere?--Wit (tawk) 03:59, 27 September 2006 (UTC)

Done. Oh, and very cool to whoever it was that put UnBestiary up there in the top-left corner, and yes, i saw the badger, too. --Señor DiZtheGreat Honor me! CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 20:13, 27 September 2006 (UTC)


Would this make a good template? (Using stub wiki div, sorry.)

--I like pie mmm (Spam me/Spam doesn't taste as good as pie)

X Block
The universe is thanking you.

21:56, 10 July 2009 (UTC)