User:OPOSSUM/Opossumopedia
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This article has been chosen by us just me.
OPOSSUM is the divine spirit-lord of all things. [1]You’d better drop on the ground like you’re dead now (like a possum!) NOW!!! Or in a short time thou shalt perish! You are nothing but my slave now!! Do as I say, dipshit!! BWAHAHAHA!!
See also:
Did you know?
★that when you close your eyes, you access your special power to only see people who would fuck you (even with a hundred-dollar bribe)?
★that OPOSSUM's homework was once eaten by his dog? No, seriously. I have a picture of the shreds, and maybe I could upload it later.
★that this “encyclopedia” will likely only ever have just the main page?
★that Cory in the House (コーリー ホワイトハウスでチョー大変!) is objectively the best anime?
★that OPOSSUM's homework was once eaten by his dog? No, seriously. I have a picture of the shreds, and maybe I could upload it later.
★that this “encyclopedia” will likely only ever have just the main page?
★that Cory in the House (コーリー ホワイトハウスでチョー大変!) is objectively the best anime?
News [etc]
OPOSSUM uses his fingers to pull shit out of his asshole in Whittier, Alaska
- OPOSSUM returns to Ventura… and possibly Uncyclopedia?"
- Pasmorade can't make a good news article (jk)
- Only OPOSSUM can
- actually OPOSSUM can’t either
- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Uncyclopedia is dead









On this day
October 24: Evil Villian Appreciation Day, National Put The Ramones On at Full Volume And Piss Off The Neighbors Day
- 1867 - After mass revolt by the Australian and New Zealand governments, Harry becomes Guardian of UCT
- 1889 - First recorded use of pure hearted maiden, strapped to railroad tracks, to attract a ransom; the deed, while dastardly, merely attracts Royal Canadian Mounted Police who save the girl and thwart the plan.
- 1931 - Polish schoolboy Joseph Ratzinger is arrested for arson, rape and general troublemaking. The Pope declares this day an International catholic holiday.
- 1941 - Hitler writes the lyrics of "Blitzkrieg Bop". Later becomes a hit song by The Ramones.
- 1943 - Morrocco becomes capital of evil villains; they are simply fed up to "here" with Hitler's needy personality
- 1969 - Your second-grade teacher, mean old Miss Masters takes away your favorite doll and holds it ransom; demands that you earn an "A" on your spelling test or "Dolly gets it"
- 1977 - Habitat for Humanity contemplates rebuilding the Big Bad Wolf's house for charity. Instead decides on Euthanasia as a more cost-sensitive option.
- 1984 - A science teacher from Great Yarmouth sends his class zipwiring down pylon wires, claiming a man who looked a spitting image of Osama Bin Laden told him to do so. It turned out to be the janitor. Incredibly, no-one was even injured and everyone cleared the zipline.
- 2005 - Dick Cheney gets a dozen roses.
- 2006 - George Bush holds Ramone concert; all of Canada kept awake until 3am
- 2007 - Harry Potter 7 comes out -SPOILER: Voldemort idealised as upstanding being, wins Hermione's heart. In desperation Harry becomes gay.
Picture for today
manaqi iliʔi kʰapa OPOSSUMOPEDIA
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
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- ↑ Recent findings have shown that Opossum is not the prime deity of Chowgism; he is merely a preacher. The real god of all moccasins and New World marsupials is CHOWG.