Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/February 18

February 18: Penis Day (Tonga)

• 4000 BC - Men discover their hands reach down to their genitals, and there is peace for three thousand years before they get bored and start killing each other with pointy sticks.
• 1791 - American imperialists "liberate" the state of Vermont because of its vast maple syrup reserves.
• 1861 - Jefferson Davis is declared president of the Confederacy after saying the "hard R" N-word fifty times in only six seconds.
• 1885 - Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn is published, its numerous grammatical errors are labelled by the publisher as a regional dialect.
• 1970 - The Chicago Seven are found guilty of being dirty commie hippies who might as well be guilty.
• 2010 - WikiLeaks publishes hundreds of thousands of classified documents revealing exactly where the U.S. keeps its nudes.

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