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- 660 BC - Japan is founded after Amaterasu, Goddess of the Sun, uses the leftovers made from creating South Korea and China.
- 1889 - The Japanese Constitution is written, grants every citizen the right to work until fatal exhaustion, and the right to die lonely and afraid.
- 1979 - Iran is reformed as an Islamic theocracy, Ayatollah Khomeini bans neckties, brussels sprouts, and looking people in the eye.
- 1990 - Nelson Mandela is released from prison after 27 years, goes on an insane drug-fueled bender before resuming his South African Gandhi imitation.
- 2001 - E-mail which looks like a computer virus ends up being just a picture of tennis player Anna Kournikova.
- 2017 - North Korean ballistic missile headed for Japan deftly dispatched by Katana expert and anime aficionado (Pictured), who teleported behind the rogue ICBM and sliced it in half.