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Today's featured article

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Biffy Clyro is a Scottish rock band from Scotland. As well as being Scottish, nobody outside of the rainy isles has heard of them. The band is composed of one Scottish guy, and two other Scottish guys who are for some reason twins, even though they look nothing alike. During concerts, the trio are joined by musicians Mike Vennart and Dick "99% of Gamblers Quit Before They Win it Big" Ingram. Currently signed to 14th Floor Records, they have released at least six albums. Following the first three, their maybe-existent fan base grew to slightly larger numbers. As for who they actually are, I'm still not sure. I'm pretty sure they're a band, however. As well as being from Scotland, they are apparently very popular in the UK, which is not a place I've visited. As for their music... I'm not sure that exists either. (Full article...)

Did you know?

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  • ... that "crack" is the hood's most effective diet pill? (Pictured)
  • ... that cutting off your hands, nose, and head reduces the spread of germs by 100%?
  • ... that if you put an ear up to a person's leg you can hear them say, "What the fuck are you doing?"
  • ... that you should accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, today!
  • ... that dyslexic farmers wear catflaps on their heads?
  • ... that applause was invented to mock the deaf?
  • ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
  • ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?

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On this day

At least you know what you're getting into.

March 12: Indecent Exposure Day

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1up Soda
Quenching the thirst of millions of plumbers across the nation, it's the ultimate soda.

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