User talk:LisaKachold

My Contributions

References

• Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends
• How to be funny and not just stupid
• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• Colonization of the Week
• Rewrite Something
• Idea Categories
• Village Dump
• Administrators
• Uncyclopedia:Ignore_all_rules
• Adopt-a-Noob program
• Formatting Zana Dark's Style Manual

Again, welcome! --Sycamore (Talk) 15:09, December 24, 2009 (UTC)

Don't wear out your fingers!

Use the double-bracket coding for links to other articles within Uncyclopedia! Otherwise everyone will be baffled and no one will dare to edit your stuff. (Hey, maybe that's not a bad thing!) I've converted the section on Etymology in Obnosis. Spıke ¬  01:53 26-Dec-09 ....and finished doing so in the intro as well. When linking outside Uncyclopedia, continue to use the single-bracket form. Spıke ¬  02:38 26-Dec-09

I use the Process to change the linked word to another sense? http://it-clowns.com 04:41, December 26, 2009 (UTC)

If that is a response--if that is a signature--I don't understand. I was not addressing meaning but simply coding. The above, for example, you can code [[Thought experiment|Process]] Spıke ¬  04:50 26-Dec-09

Note Taken! Thanks! Visiting Myself from This Future 06:53, December 26, 2009 (UTC)

VFH

Self-nominations require a Pee Review. That's a rule we have. Another is "No shirt, no shoes, no problem". We're cool like that. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 11:25, December 26, 2009 (UTC)

Ah...

It does have a listing in Pee Review, but it was misformatified. I fixed. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 12:17, December 26, 2009 (UTC)

“You are our best and only friend?”

~ Darrell Hannah as Pris in Blade Runner

“Don't know, I don't know such stuff. I just do eyes, ju-, ju-, just eyes... just genetic design, just eyes. You Nexus, huh? I design your eyes.”

~ Hannibal Chew

---

I for one will decline the offer on the talk page to add levity to the article, if constrained to "keep...the content, history and silly truth of it all." Indeed, any humor I add might readily violate those criteria. The levity that's there right now is confined to irreverent musings at the end of some of the sections concerning what you have just written; and the sections themselves, in meticulously documenting what the word means, doesn't mean, and might mean, make it hard to evenn reach the end of them.

I will change the talk page so people will edit it. Thanks for noting that! Visiting Myself from This Future 16:40, December 27, 2009 (UTC)

In fact--as I wrote to a different user at the end of a Pee Review that led to a flame war--"You have agendas other than humor," in this case, defending, in this new forum, your ownership of a word that the Scientologists stole. (And, in contrast to the article's talk page, "theft" is not "funny.") Were I to make sport in the article in a way that weakened or even ridiculed your claim, you would surely revert the changes. Please now apply your brilliance to a subject in which you don't have such a personal stake.

PS--A fellow libertarian might enjoy the new Section 1 that I added yesterday to Work. Spıke ¬  12:11 26-Dec-09

“Arbeit Macht Frei”

~ Hitler

+ ]-[ /-\ /\/ ]< $

Visiting Myself from This Future 00:29, December 27, 2009 (UTC)

What are you doing?

This is already on VFH and failing.--    00:11, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Not any more! Moo ha-ha! (Also, what DrStrange said. There's already one here) Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 00:32, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Pout I followed a LINK -

“Children say the darnded things...”

~ Art Linkletter

User:LisaKachold/sig 02:34, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Okay...the key to getting your signature in a document rather than a link to your signature there, is to type the following into the Signature: field of My preferences/User profile (no spaces between the braces): {{SUBST:nosubst|User:LisaKachold/sig}} Spıke ¬  02:37 28-Dec-09

KISSES!

Kisses! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 02:54, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

That's got it! and the beauty of this is (1) it doesn't vomit the code from sig into the pages you sign, and (2) in fact all your signatures done this way will pick up any future changes you make to sig.

Now, I have gone to work on Obnosis and its talk page. Spıke ¬  02:58 28-Dec-09 And on your signature page. There were one too many uses of <small>, which spilled over onto everything that followed it. The only way to control the formatting of the timestamp is to put code to generate the timestamp in sig and sign with three tildes instead of four (to inhibit the automatic timestamp). Spıke ¬  03:03 28-Dec-09

Use this code in your preferences signature input: {{SUBST:nosubst|User:LisaKachold/sig}} <font style="font-size:9px;">{{subst:CURRENTTIME}}, {{subst:CURRENTDAY}} {{subst:CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{subst:CURRENTYEAR}}</font> to insert the timestamp at the end of you name and you can adjust the style attribute on the font tag however you wish. Then, as Spike said, sign with three tildes instead of four (~~~) See? -> ~Formerly Annoying Crap 16:42, 28 December 2009

Obnosis

Took a quick read, interesting concept. Wanted to mention that wikipedia doesn't have an obnosis article anymore, they huffed it. So your wikipedia link just goes into the "nothing here" page. You can actually link it to any article you want, and still leavethe 'obnosis' name on it, so if you have a favorite wikipedia page, . . .Aleister in Chains 03:22, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Ah, I read the deleted article from wikipedia. Truly, obnosis, in the old school Hubbardly sense of the word. The task now, to make your article funny, which should be a fun and limit-breaking work of joy. Then maybe you can pick a topic aside from all that and write a funny article starting with humor and working up (or down) from there. Birds call me, I must go. Aleister in Chains 03:43, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

I don't think the scientists over at scientology will bother with your pages here, it would make them look silly to attack a humor site. They might be batshag crazy, but they're not stupid. And as an OT 9 myself, and a member of the Sea Org, (I can see what you're hiding behind the cookbooks, for instance) I "know" how "to know", and knowing I do, you know? You've come to a safe harbor in uncyclopdia, except for <insert name here>, who's in black ops and actually does huff kittens. Aleister in Chains 13:11, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Well Hello There!

Couldn't help but read up a bit... The formatting page I made might assist you in your uncyclopedic endeavors. Cheers! ~Formerly Annoying Crap 05:15, 28 December 2009

Thanks so much! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 12:19, 29 December 2009

AAN

Hi Lisa,

I'd like you to remove yourself from the list of adopters for now. You've been here for about a week now and still seem to have some issues with formatting and getting your head around the way this place works = so I don't think you are an experienced editors, yet. As soon as you gain some experience, you can add yourself back there. Thanks. ~ 16:54, December 28, 2009 (UTC)

Hi Mordillo! Thanks for stopping by! Your english is fairly good; see my constructive critique {proofread} on your grammar above? I have not had recent experience with editing text, or developing for Wiki in about a year. What I did know was not completely overwritten with other wetwear entries (IT Whoring), just archived... I also have been editing without vision correction, which I am sure you can appreciate, causes a slight handicap. Therefore, I will happily take your request to remove my offer to assist others, as an "experienced editor" from the adoption page, at least until I:

1. Can build new content in userspace
2. Read all the help files and policies
3. Navigate everything available
4. Get edit experience with existing pages
5. Become familiar with the special ways things are done on uncyclopedia.

Thanks again for taking time to write on my Talk page! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 00:43, 29 December 2009

Thanks. And appreciate the proofreading. I'll be sure to drop by the next time I have the urge to drop an unnecessary s or twos. ~ 14:46, December 29, 2009 (UTC)

Niice. ~Formerly Annoying Crap 16:43, 29 December 2009

PS: While we are on the subject of << the special ways things are done on uncyclopedia >>, does anyone here have (or know of) a summary, that lists those things, and focuses on where they differ from (plus, where they are similar to, or "the same as") the ways things are done on Wikipedia? I ask, because the "MediaWiki" software does seem pretty familiar, so I know "some" about the ways to use that; but as far as "rules" etc., they are probably different, even with some of the same tools. Thanks!... --Mike Schwartz 06:37, January 3, 2010 (UTC)

Why don't you read the welcome message I gave you? ;) —Paizuri MUN (Talk • Contribs • Poll!) 06:45, 3 January 2010 (UTC)

Palargonium? Where is that Welcome Page, please? URL reference? – Preceding unsigned comment added by Mike Schwartz (talk • contribs)

BGBU and HTBFANJS is what you're looking for. The difference is not the mediawiki formatting, which is quite similar to Wikipedia. It's the approach and the spirit of the site which is very different. ~ 21:52, January 3, 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, this site is (somewhat) more relaxing than Wikipedia is, since it's a humor site. Also, my welcome message is on your talk page. Read over it, and if you need anything else, feel free to ask me (or anyone else; it doesn't really matter). —Paizuri MUN (Talk • Contribs • Poll!) 22:15, 3 January 2010 (UTC)

As long as you don't ask this guy or that guy. ~ 22:22, January 3, 2010 (UTC)

Vote for me you kittens on Uncyclopedia:Noob_of_the_Month L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 04:35, 4 January 2010

Wow, breaking into our conversation to try and get us to vote for you? That was kinda rude... You got my vote. —Paizuri MUN (Talk • Contribs • Poll!) 04:40, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

Your Userpage

You really want it deleted? --UU - natter 09:32, Dec 29

No - Please spare my userspace! No deletion of User:LisaKachold. Thanks for the X-checking! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 12:01, 29 December 2009

Arizona

I mentioned on Talk:Obnosis that I'd be operating on Pacific Standard Time last night. But you were away editing other pages (as I suggested you do). That's why we have watch lists; also to defend our proudest works against the inevitable stream of AnonIPs.

Anyway, the article on Arizona is in rough shape--pretty funny, but mostly lists. It could be a test of your sense of humor, wiki formatting, and ability to write in complete sentences. I presume that, in the Uncyclopedia version, Joe Arpaio is not a name thrown around repeatedly to get an instant laugh, but is the Governor. As either an example of the art or a glimpse into my world, I recommend the article on New Hampshire. Spıke ¬  16:17 29-Dec-09

OOH! Goodie! I was attacking Things to Do discovering Legend of Hawkings; first 3 sections look a wee bit better? I will happily dive right in with Arizona (moving more slowly today). Glasses monocle propped from one bleach blond corn braided eye brow. Sheriff Joe is historic for constant contention with everyone, making his prisoners live in tents in 120 degree summers, racial profiling and targeting illegal aliens. Other Arizona characters abound... I accept the challenge, my liege! I cloned it into userspace User:LisaKachold/Arizona with brainstorming on the discussion whiteboard L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs)

You're getting stuff done, though the lists you are assembling ought not be inserted into the article; rather, take a broad view and turn the best from both the existing and your new lists into prose. PS--The Uncyclopedia style manual now references a little addendum that I wrote, obviously anticipating your arrival. Spıke ¬  14:33 30-Dec-09

Intellectualism (even as a SPIKE defense mechanism) doesn't make for belly laughs, eh? What have I fallen into Anti-English Comedy Writer Coach HELL? Giggle, snerkle, bull bait..... <pout> You have to admit it's MUCH better? L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 00:19, 31 December 2009

Yes, the lists are clotting into sentences and paragraphs in a couple places. Spıke ¬  01:15 31-Dec-09

I will fix things and add finishing touches. THANKS for the challenge, feedback and direction! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 01:28, 31 December 2009

Am now done removing the name of ANOSIKE from my game-worn jersey and can pay closer attention. (If the armchair psychoanalysis ends.) Two scissor cuts will enable re-labeling on behalf of Manchester's most lovable uninvited sports mascot. Again, I'll probably be on-line until about 23:00 your time. Spıke ¬  01:33 31-Dec-09

Have now converted the only section we'll need on spectator sports, and corrected the name of Jon Kyl. Hey--are you at all domestic? Formula 409 loosened the iron-on glue and let me pull those letters off the vinyl uniform, but remnants of the glue remain, and it has more tenacity than I will have fingerprints. Know any secrets? Spıke ¬  02:03 31-Dec-09

No, I am hardly domestic; but I can google and my basic chemistry is fair. If this is sticky greasy type of globules, a degreaser usually works. Also, hot water and more grease has been known to assist to dissolve stuff stuck to vinyl. Just picking off the pieces, while tedious, might work? If the glue was a kind of rubber cement, it will probably dry hard and white. Planning to cover with other applique's might be best now? I moved in the new Arizona at midnight GMT -7. It's good, but might be better later. It's at least better than what was there? Happy New Years Eve! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 13:16, 31 December 2009

I had tried all of the above. Current plan is the same as what I did to the old jersey when the Millrats switched leagues: Black permanent marker. You went away, and the injured Celtics didn't make a game of it in Phoenix, so I signed off early last night. Yes, Arizona is much better than the previous version, but don't stop now. But, if editing in mainspace, note my previous suggestion (under "style points") to use fewer, longer edits to simplify the change history. Spıke ¬  12:57 31-Dec-09

Yes, I want to merge more of the brainstorming data points and other desert demographics, so it has a genuine belly laugh for people who live in Arizona. I have a couple of work projects (mail server setup in Dubai) that were waiting for project milestones scheduled immediately. Happy New Year SPIKE thanks for all the fun assistance. I will edit slowly and well in real time for Phoenix.

L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 13:16, 31 December 2009

Vote for me already Uncyclopedia:Noob_of_the_Month L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 04:40, 4 January 2010

Seriously Though

Thanks For Buying Our Book! Me and Elmo take bodily functions seriously and If you enjoyed Menstruation: A Guide For Men, be sure to check out these other books in our series: Why Is There Blood In My Toilet? BOOGER! (With Oscar The Grouch)

I remember actually seeing "The Trial Of Billy Jack" in the theaters when I was a tyke. Trying to rewatch it as an adult was very painful, especially the length. Good luck on Arizona. It's big.--    22:06, December 31, 2009 (UTC)

Love Jack Black! Yes, I agree Arizona is too big! I am carving it down = moved out of userspace too early perhaps, but it's a great deal better than what was there. L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 22:25, 31 December 2009

Vote for me already Uncyclopedia:Noob_of_the_Month L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 04:39, 4 January 2010

Thanks

Thanks for the congrats. Appreciated. I've looked at 'Arizone' a couple of timesx in the last days, it's pretty good for using wikipedia as a base. An interesting concept. Maybe a couple of the photos or a few can be enlarged, imnho (my own bias, I like large photos). Thanks again, If the signature messes up here it's under construction. User:Aleister in Chains 18:33, January 1, 2010 (UTC)

Yes, ARIZONA a rewrite to an existing vandalized SATIRE page --> offloaded awarded from SPIKE and his rewriting mad minions. I am loving it.

Can't wait to add minature trains for Light Rail and biker helmet laws. L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 22:18, 1 January 2010

Congats on the notm nomination. What I learned looking at your stuff and checking policy is that it's ok to use an existing wikipedia article as a template for a uncy page, but there is an actual template to be put on the page if that's the case. Maybe that should go on osmosis or orgasmatron or whatever the Hubbard word is? But you're off to a nice start, congrats again. Aleister in Chains Nightime, MMX

Thanks Aleister ---> I got this assignment from SPIKE ---> I live in AZ so Arizona was fun for us. Mine doesn't look like the templates, but more like the other pages. Might be an example of IGNORE all RULES? Vote for me already Uncyclopedia:Noob_of_the_Month L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 04:38, 4 January 2010

I guess I have a thing for sexist humor

Ladies & Gentlemen, Welcome To Violence ...the word and the act. While violence cloaks itself in a plethora of disguises, its favorite mantle still remains... sex. Violence devours all it touches, its voracious appetite rarely fulfilled. Yet violence doesn't only destroy, it creates and molds as well. Let's examine closely then this dangerously evil creation, this new breed encased and contained within the supple skin of woman. The softness is there, the unmistakable smell of female, the surface shiny and silken, the body yielding yet wanton. But a word of caution: handle with care and don't drop your guard. This rapacious new breed prowls both alone and in packs, operating at any level, any time, anywhere, and with anybody. Who are they? One might be your secretary, your doctor's receptionist... or a dancer in a go-go club!....................................................

You'll love this too. And in real life, I'm falling over myself to be respectful and chivalrous. Go figure. Thanks for da vote! --    16:14, January 6, 2010 (UTC)

\/\/0\/\/! I love it! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 03:10, 7 January 2010

Best used in the Bedroom

You're not too bad for a noob, not too bad at all ;) ~Formerly Annoying Crap 06:27, 8 January 2010

Thanks Zana, your darkness! 98.165.44.173 Butter! Butter! Butter! L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 10:46, 8 January 2010

Work

Work has made Page One; I believe this is your doing. Thank you! Spıke ¬  16:11 23-Jan-10

Congrats

On your upcoming NOTM award! (in 1:43, that is) I would have voted on the page but I prefer to lurk when someone has a sizable lead. Then I make up for it by being the first to say welcome to the club!--    22:17, January 31, 2010 (UTC)

Congratulations, good for you! And now I've finally got the burden off of my shoulders, and onto yours. Nice work! Aleister in Chains 00:58 1 Fev. MMX

Yeah, good job! Within the next 17 days, I plan to write an article and get nominated next month before I become ineligible. For now, good job to you! --HELPME 01:02, February 1, 2010 (UTC)—Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! NOTM

Congratulations and welcome to the NotM Club! Now it's your turn to bring the refreshments. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  20:58, February 1, 2010 (UTC)

Why? had me do unspeakable things to him and the other notm'ers when I won, I still have nightmares. Can't get the taste out of my mouth, but you'll find out soon enough. Al in chains

Musicology

Musicology is currently on Votes For Deletion. The article imagines a music-based version of Scientology; it's a clever concept, unfortunately joined with childish writing. I've offered to copy-edit it but apologized that I am not familiar enough with Scientology to add really clever parallels. But perhaps you are, now. Spıke ¬  16:21 1-Feb-10

I was rewriting rewrite! Seriously, I will happily take a stab at Musicology. I will, as usual, rewrite in UserSpace, but the User_talk page is your one stop suggestion resource, where I can track each item loved/hated, adding each in a systematic way. I will share credit for your suggestions related to music (etc.). There will be stages to the project, so you might not see your suggestion list (as setup in Userspace Talk page) rolled in until last. Let's maintain respect for each other's skill and abilities as usual. Thanks again for this important mission. Mr. Phelps aka L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 18:10, 1 February 2010

I'd like to play on that too. If it's still in mainspace let's just put a construction tag on it, and tell the VFD team that some users will work on it. Thanks, Aleister in Chains 18:59 1 Feb. MMX

I took your tag off the article, it was not VFD'd yet. Al the ex notm 19:09 1 Febv. MMX

It was a custom tag, not a VFD tag. L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 19:28, 4 February 2010 That's okay I replaced it. L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 19:28, 4 February 2010

Okay, let's hit it! Since we have so many editors, I will make a stab and anyone can edit my work, change what they like, etc. It's a oolloboration - let's make each other laugh at least? L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 19:29, 1 February 2010

I've made some obvious changes )Freddie Hubbard to L. Freddie Hubbard and linked to his wiki page). Let's talk on it on the article's discussion page )(in community space, the page has been taken off the VFD list) It's actually a very good article if you know Scientology, and has some very funny bits already. Be fun to get to know you more, Al chained 19:52 1 Feb. MMX

I added notes to the Talk page of the article, and some edits (photo, etc, fixed red links etc.) See you on the talk page. Al.

Quick Question

You're a Unix admin if I remember correctly. Correctly? Don't ask why, it's for a good reason. O_O ~ 19:07, February 1, 2010 (UTC)

Yes, I am Solaris/HP-UX/AIX ian, as well as Linux. But? What is a good reason? Generally asking why is a good reason in and of itself. Or so Michael Palin maintains in History of the World Part X, of would have if he ever made it? L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 19:25, 1 February 2010

All shall be revealed in good time (hopefully tomorrow if I get the time...). Thanks! ~ 22:42, February 1, 2010 (UTC)

There. It's on the front page. ~ 16:57, February 2, 2010 (UTC)

1. tar -cvf lisakachold=noobie-goddess.tar frontpage/*

1. grep Lisa frontpage*

1. SUITE _{Much U Very Thanks}

Goobie goobie, goobie, now I can go back to evil plotting against Dana Dark! There simply must be a way to get some of that funny away from her? L!$@ (Meow!)(Contribs) 23:51, 2 February 2010

I believe it's called "cash, and loads of it". ~ 08:54, February 3, 2010 (UTC)

Template

Thank you for the kind template on my user page regarding my sad lack of featured articles. Your concern for my unfortunate condition can be swung into action if you read and like the "Anne Hathaway" article which is at the bottom of the Vote for Highlights page. Sharing the pain is what Uncy is all about. Sigh. And also, thanks for liking the LFH photo, that made me laugh when I found it. Enjoy, Al 2:21 5 Feb. MMX

Thank you, and hopefully you liked Anne. I put an option photo of a typical preclear on mujsicinologyist page. Al

Thank you very much for voting for me to play on the front page for two days. How can I thank you? You wannna come down here with me, I won't mind. But if not, not all girls swing that way, I'll understand.