User:Dagoth Ur, Mad God/A Dagoth

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THIS ARTICLE A DAGOTH.


My head a dagoth!
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Wikipedia has a dagoth'd. Therefore, there is no Wikipedia article on A Dagoth.

“A little adagoth'tion is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely hilarious”

~ Oscar Wilde on a dagoth

“Your mom's head a dagoth!”

~ Your mom on a dagoth

“What Happen?
Someone set us up the bomb”

~ Catz on a dagoth

“AAAH-AAA-DAGOTH, AAA-EEE-AAAA-A DAGOTH!”

~ Matt Bellamy in "Knights of A Dagothia"

“ I Went to the moon, and there i saw A Dagoth”

~ Niel Armstrong on A Dagoth

“Bob Dole's pants A Dagoth! ”

~ Bob Dole on a dagoth

A dagoth is the process of explosion but in a “ka-blooey” way. Most a dagoth'tions do not necessary require explosives or fire for it to a dagoth. A dagoth'tions can be found in places where there is a buildup of a high outward force (such as where there is too much confusion). A dagoth'tions are (naturally) rare and beautiful events, much like the event horizon of a black hole, but less spaghettified. Another way to say a dagoth'd is engsmdagoth'd.

History[edit | edit source]

Lenin's hand a dagoth as he calls the digitist a wanker.

The discovery of a dagoth'tions dates back to the 1900s when explodogists were developing a new form of rapid expanding energy force [citation needed]. Explodogists had been experimenting with explosions to develop a replacement for the common horse. They found that when materials that normally did not react with organic material, such as snacks and people, would a dagoth if the mass of the objects is a prime number. The explodogists named this reaction the I Can See it A Dagoth Principle. They could not determine why this happened due to the lack of technology.

While explodogists worked further into researching the cause of a dagoth, scientists researched into historical accounts of a dagoth. The earliest record of a dagothing dates back to the Triassic period. There was a hypothesis that, in addition to the possible asteroid, a dagoth played a role in the extinction of many animals. Many animals may have suffered spontaneous a dagoth'tions (See spontaneus a dagoth'tions below).

Thornton Wilder was secretly an explodogist, and he snuck his own Deadly Dagoth'tion theory into his play, Our Town:

"Y'know what I think, George? I think the moon's getting nearer and nearer, and there's gonna be a big dagoth'tion!"

Recent studies show that this would cause the whole planet to a dagoth, making a dagoth'tion that would a dagoth everything that can possibly be a dagoth'd.

During the 1950s, the microwave oven was developed and sold to many households[citation needed]. Some users microwaved food that was non-porous or microwaved a glass of water. When taken out of the microwave, users placed the food or glass of water on the table. As they did this, the food or glass of water seemed to miraculously a dagoth! The scientific community was astonished that they may have discovered the cause of a dagoth. However, when thorough research was performed, it was found that the food or water had just simply became unstable and a dagoth'd due to the high level of energy that the food gained.

Another recent exploration of a dagoth'tionating is credited to Deidara (see: Transvestite) seen in anime Naruto (see: crap). He causes peoples who cannot comprehend his 1337 art to a dagoth. Also, he/she is subject to butthurt from fangirls.

Today, we know the cause of a dagoth'tion thanks to greatly improved scientific equipment and resources (such as the computer and Uncyclopedia).

Etymology[edit | edit source]

The term "A Dagoth" comes from the name Ada, meaning “Ada” and the Latin Gothrene meaning “Ka-Blooey!”

How a dagoth works[edit | edit source]

“You got some a'dagoth'n to do.”

~ Ricky from I Love Lucy

A dagothing is the process in which Adas – which we all know are the major constituent of quarks and leptons – suddenly start craving Cheetos made by leprechaun migrant workers. Unfortunately, due to the size of the Adas, Cheetos cannot be delivered in the bite-size pieces that they desire. (No, not even those crumbs that are left at the end. Mmmm, crumbs...) This causes the Adas to a selerate in every direction known to humans (and 7 others) in the search for Cheetos of the right size.

Molecular image of a dagoth'tion that occurred to someone who has a dagoth'd.

However, due to the incredibly strong attraction between the Adas and their non-existent Cheetos, such a large energy force is created in such a small vicinity that all surrounding material implodes. Unfortunately, this results in an extremely dense area forming sans-Ada, a.k.a. a black hole. Luckily, this style of black hole only exists for a fraction of a second as the Adas get bored due to their incredibly short attention span and forget why they weren't chillin' at their crib.

On a macroscopic scale, the a dagothing object appears to combust and you suddenly lose all your Cheetos. However, the onlooker will suddenly be propositioned by an unsavory amount of Doritos. On impact with air, much like anti-matter, a dagoth'tions will a dagoth, sending chips and cracks flying down your trousers. Then, in a blanket of chips and cracks, you will die, mercilessly scattered among the rocks and other sharp things. I like eggs.

The stress ball was used and went A dagoth, o noes.

Gooch Nibbler = A dagoth!!!!!!!>

Spontaneous a dagoth'tions[edit | edit source]

SEHS: A dagothing head

“Yeah, like that can happen.”

~ Captain Sarcasm on spontaneous a dagoth'tions

“Spontaneous a dagoth'tions are mostly unplanned.”

~ Captain Obvious on spontaneous a dagoth'tions

Spontaneous a dagoth'tion is a process that has been carefully studied. Although there is still much to discover, several theoretical explanations have been created.

Go ahead a dagoth[edit | edit source]

Main article: SADHS

SADHS (Sudden A Dagoth'd Head Syndrome), also known in the pseudo-scientific community as Hyper-Cerebral Electrosis, or HCE, is a condition believed to be caused by overloading the brain with the body's own electricity through intense thinking and concentration, resulting in the spontaneous combustion or volatile explosion of the patient's head.

WARNING! A Dagoth'tion Imminent!

A dagoth you a go[edit | edit source]

Spontaneous a dagoth'tions that occur to humans and a few animals result in a split-second severe mental insanity. When people are repeatedly stressed or their mood abruptly changes to anger, their body cannot handle this pressure very well. If the body is not capable of suppressing this anger or stress, it can result in a dagoth without warning from a chemical equilibrium imbalance. A splosion may also be caused by holding in farts too long, causing intestinal gasses to ignite.

This disorder is the result of the genetic makeup of that person. People with a life-long career that deals with troublesome areas, such as technical support or administrative work, will have a greater chance of a dagothing.

[edit] Spontaneous a dagoth'tions

There is no cure, but there are treatment options.

Fruit a dagoth is really fruitiest.

Fruit a dagoth'tions[edit | edit source]

A dagoth'tions can occur in some fruits without any reason. Cases of a dagoth in fruits include Fruitopia and the mysterious fruit-a-dagoth-in-your-face-when-you-eat-it affliction. In Fruitopia, fruits a dagoth into a delicious drink. Fruit-a-dagoth-in-your-face-when-you-eat-it usually occurs when someone is about to take a bite of a fresh, juicy fruit. The cause of spontaneous fruit a dagoth is not known.

A fruitcake is the opposite of fruit a dagoth'tions. Instead of an a dagothing outward force, fruit is drawn into its centre core while rapidly increasing in mass.

Applications of a dagoth[edit | edit source]

A dagoth in card games

“I sure a dagoth'd that bitch.”

A dagoth is often used in the media as a more colourful and vibrant explosion. Such example would be a car chase scene. Instead of the car exploding, the occupants of the car would a dagoth. When a dagoth'tions are used effectively, it manifests a brilliance that natural a dagoth's display.

Use By Noobs[edit | edit source]

N00bs use the term adagoth as a form of 13375p33k. For example:

Non-Noob: Lol I pwnt u with a rocket launcher!

Noob: Oh teh noes!!! I am adagoth!!11!eleventyone!!

Non-Noob: Wtf?

A dagoth simulation[edit | edit source]

It is possible to replicate a miniature a dagoth'tion by using some sort of external energy or force, such as a large hammer against a brittle rock.

A common example that is taught in science class at school is the water balloon. The water balloon is a safe and easy method of demonstrating a simulation of an a dagoth'tion. Students simply fill the water balloon with water and the a dagothing device is made. To activate the a dagoth, take a pin and poke the balloon. The a dagoth will occur splashing water all over the place. You can best appreciate the a dagoth'tion with a high speed camera.


A dagoth: the command prompt[edit | edit source]

Micro$oft secretly enabled a dagoth as a DOS command. Opening the command prompt and entering C:\adagoth would start a countdown which would, when finished, cause your hard drive to a dagoth. Entering D:\adagoth made the CD drive a dagoth. And entering A:\adagoth would would make the floppy drive a dagoth. If you have a B:\ drive, you can a dagoth it by entering B:\adagoth. Usually this makes the 5.25" floppy drive a dagoth! If you enter this into a Linux shell, it a dagoth's all computers within a 5-mile radius that run Window$. By entering Ω:/adagoth, the internets will a dagoth. If you loved your PC, you would have entered this DOS command.

(Note: drive letter may vary between PCs.)

ADAGOTH'D!!!!!!!!!![edit | edit source]

BOOM YOU ADAGOTH'D! By reading this paragraph you have now adagoth'd. How's it feel? Painful amirite? LOL

See also[edit | edit source]

Jack Black, you A Dagoth yourself?!?

“There's only one thing worse than being a dagoth'd and that is – *A DAGOTH* ”

~ Attributed to Oscar Wilde before he a dagoth'd


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