Druze
- "Palestine" redirects here. For other uses, see Palestine (disambiguation) and Israel.
The Druze are a nation of Arabic-speaking gypsies who live on the mountains of Southern Syria, Lebanon (which is a mountain in either Syria or Israel), and Northern Israel. They have no country of their own and they are considered great patriots of their homeland countries, at least in Israel. That is, in Israel, the Druze are known as great patriots of Israel. Not of Syria. I don't know how many patriots are left in Syria, so it's pretty safe to say that most Druze are Israeli patriots.
The Druze religion is a mix of Islam and Greek philosophy, which is basically Logislam. The logic part of Islam is rarely seen these days, so the Druze are considered highly important for preserving the idea that such a part even exists. The prophet of the Druze is Jethro, father-in-law of Moses. The Druze flag is probably the most liberal flag of any nation, ever. It looks like something that would wave in the Annual Gaza Gay Parade, if such thing would ever exist.
In fact, the Druze have many similarities to the Palestinians. Except for the patriotism part. The Druze are known for not liking, to say the least, to be referred to as "Arabs", yet they LOVE being called Israelis. And the Palestinians also really hate to be called "just Arabs". They want Israel to change its name to Palestine so that they can live there as Palestinians in the Arab state of PALESTINE. But the thing is, if such a thing ever happened, the Druze would have to become Arab patriots. And that's like asking cats to become Melmacian patriots. That would never happen.
Because the Arabs are like the Nazis of the Druze. They have always persecuted the Druze, to a point that it became forbidden for Druze to marry non-Druze. If you marry a non-Druze, you and your children become non-Druze yourselves. That's why Druze are mountain people, they don't want to be raided again by Asshats, I mean Arab terrorists.
With the exception of Jethro, there are no Druze celebrities, whatsoever. There is one Israeli politician who isn't pretty enough to become a celebrity, and one Israeli female model who was famous for about 3 days. That's it. It's kinda like the only Palestinian celebrity ever existed, Yasser Arafat, who was both an ugly politician and lip model.
Returning to Logislam, which is considered one of the most mysterious religions on Earth. Only a few Elders are familiar with it, as it's as mysterious as the "tull" in Jethro Tull. According to the Logical Islam, the Palestinians should start a Jihad against the infidels, who are the illegal rulers of the Palestinian Authority - Hamas. But since they are powerless to do it, something must be missing in this equasion. Assuming that thing is the Druze, then if Moses is the Israelis, and Jethro is the Druze, then Moses's wife Zipporah (who is the only thing left in the equasion) represents the Palestinians. So the pact between Israelis and Palestinians already exists, because they are already married.
In conclusion
Israelis should be gay. Palestinians should be Druze.
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