Template:RecentUnNews

• Stranger Things 5 teaser and release dates drop at Tudum (Pictured)
• Chris Brown from Elevation Worship to fill in for Chris Brown the R&B singer until further notice
• Taylor Swift buys back her masters
• "Real" Timothee Chalamet at 2024 look-alike contest actually Finn Wolfhard
• Qatar personally gifts Trump a plane
• Austria wins Eurovision
• MLB welcomes cheaters and pedophiles into HOF
• New cast and plotlines announced for longest running Filipino sitcom
• BREAKING: NEW POPE ALERT!!!
• Trump: "You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big."
• Phil Collins comes out of retirement after wank
• PBS and NPR to lose funding
• Spain and Portugal experience a country-wide blackout
• Sportswriter Leon Sandcastle gives his two cents on NFL draftee Shedeur Sanders's draft slide
• Trump believes that 200 countries negotiated trade deals with him
• Man delivers profound philosophical speech about elephants during his sojourn at the zoo
• Upcoming South Park season will be Canadian
• World shocked as Pope Francis kicks bucket (This is not a drill!)
  • Chris Rock will succeed him in new comedy Head of Church

Ongoing: Eurovision • The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, and Deltarune • Russian Invasion • Israel-Palestine conflict • DOGE budget cuts • Trump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers

Recent deaths: Ruth Buzzi • Night Court • Lopez vs Lopez • George Wendt • Updates for Mortal Kombat 1 • Rick Derringer • Carolina Hurricanes' choke job in the playoffs • New York Knicks' surprisingly kickass season

Upcoming deaths: DEI • Google's ad monopoly • Cleveland Browns' locker room • LeBron James' career • Diddy's and Chris Brown's chances at freedom • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen