Forum:Mahm00shA's 18th birthday is two weeks ahead. Bring presents, or DIE!

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My fucking 18th birthday is on the 9th of July. Ill be 18 and you know what kind of presents I need. Happy Birthday cards and presents are to be sent to my talkpage. You have been warned and you have a full two weeks. Those who won't say Happy birthday are going to Hell. Oh, and there is a contest, too:

• Write a short story in your userspace involving me getting raped, killed, mutilated, shat upon, etc.. and post a link to it here. The best (worst) story earns its author a shiney template and a free ticket to the Pyramids if (s)he ever visits Egypt. (that one is for real) Happy birthday to me. Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:24 June 25 '09

And we have two weeks in which to do this? I shall maybe think about attempting. Sunbeam no u Have you been doing your ironing? 17:34, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

yeah, and make it brutal Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:38 June 25 '09

Here's your gift -> . Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! 05:52, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Ah the 18th birthday. A fantastic one really. Of course for me, my parents' divorce was finalizing and my dad decided it would be a fantastic idea to propose to his new wife during my birthday dinner. Bright side is I was then able to smoke cigarettes. Mmmmm. -RAHB 14:39, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Ah, I'll try to get my dad to GIVE me a Cuban CIGAR :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 15:05 June 26 '09

Just 19 years more to my 18th birthday... Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! 14:42, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

So, are you going to join the Egyptian army when you're 18 and fight the Zionists? Because that's what we do, only the other way around. We don't fight the Zionists. That would be just silly. ~ 14:49, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Since you brought that point up, no. I still have 6 years before joining the army. And when I do, it's in a medical corps, no frontline action.. But seriously, dont bring it up again, I want to keep it friendly here. Plus, I dont believe in that Zionist conspiracy bullshit. Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 14:57 June 26 '09

In Singapore, you have to join the army when you're 18. Or 21. I cant remember. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! 14:58, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

In America, I can do whatever I want and I'm not obligated to join the military. Neiner neiner neeeeiiinerrrr! -RAHB 16:14, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

We fight for our honoUr, for our kings, for the green lands where dragons fly, my sword is my companion, my shield is my guardian, my platemail armor is where I urinate, I march to battle, thirsty for the blood of my enemies, I fear no evil, I anoint my phallus with the blood of the fallen... I'm a lvl 75 warrior, after all :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 16:22 June 26 '09

Well, I'm a lvl 1 American. So, enjoy spilling the blood of your enemies. Heay RAHB! Pass me a beer! The President of Iran WOODY! DeathLife? to the infidels! Go USA? 16:27, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

want some blood instead of the bear? *blink blink* Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 16:36 June 26 '09

Bear? Sunbeam no u Have you been doing your ironing? 16:40, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Chicken. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! 18:11, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Other edible items. To the OP: I'm 6 months older than you. Neener neener neeeeeener. ~Sponsorship^Sucks _!!! (01:19 06-27-2009)

Yes, but in maturity, you are 8 years younger. I'm not in this. I'm 18 years younger in maturity. My Angry Anniversary Celebration! Nice... (01:21 06-27-2009)

I'm gonna go ahead and make sure people show up to this party. You should've put a request in the newspaper, but since you didn't, I guess I'll have to pull out my gat. Don Puttano cHeDDs 03:51,5July,2009

Please Don't Kill or Ban Me, Admin!

Don't Ban Me, Mahm00shA! Happy birthday.... don't kill me... And here's the present: this nice article that needs to be looked at and reviewed. |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Pinoy CUN|IC Kill | 09:14, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

Ooh, thanks :) im not a reviewer though, but i'll take a look Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 10:00 June 27 '09

Short Story?

Like how short? A sentence or something? Happy birthday! And what? I'm tired. I should go lie down. Don Puttano cHeDDs 21:38,28June,2009

Like two or three PARAGRAPHS. And you can do it after you get up from lying down, of course :P Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 21:40 June 28 '09

2-3 PARAGRAPHS??? That's like, 5 sentences each, which is like 35 or something sentences! So "Some dude shoots Mahm00shA" isn't enough for a story? Don Puttano cHeDDs 16:41,29June,2009

Entries Here

• Not quite finished yet. Don Puttano cHeDDs 19:58,29June,2009

  Ooh. Doritos. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! ~09:48/1/July

  Yeah, I had to do it. It's me after all. I think it's about done now. I tried to be as mean and sort of racist as possible, if you don't mind. It is for your birthday. Don Puttano cHeDDs 02:46,2July,2009

  THE GREAT EPIC BATTLE BETWEEN Mahm00sh AND Mahmud Shah IS BEGINNING! L0lz0rz!!! Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! ~07:35/2/July

  What? I used Mahm00sh, ya know, getting rid of the last letter. Very original, right? Don Puttano cHeDDs 22:20,2July,2009

  Too original. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! ~12:59/5 of July

• Neither have I. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! _{{06:50 30 June 2009}} 06:50, 30 June 2009 (UTC)

  Okay, it's done. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! _{{07:12 30 June 2009}} 07:12, 30 June 2009 (UTC)

  Whoa, man, that's a lot of cameos. Don Puttano cHeDDs 15:41,30June,2009

  I was bored... Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! ~09:43/1/July

  I had cameos too, but mine are subtle. It doesn't actually say the people's name in it. Don Puttano cHeDDs 22:20,2July,2009

  Guildy's had lots. Mr Zhe-mel-talki-signe-singaporel-bling ^Brute! It's 11 July-02:12 ...with savings!

  You had more. And Guildy called me great. Don Puttano cHeDDs 02:41,11July,2009

• I'll do one eventually. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 17:25, 5 July 2009 (UTC)

  Only 4 days left, get to it. Though it only takes you about 6 seconds to do an article apparently. Don Puttano cHeDDs 17:35,5July,2009

  Here it is. Sorry it's late. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 19:14, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

  I'm flattered. Don Puttano cHeDDs 19:32,10July,2009

  It's a little lot on the short side, but I hope Mooshy likes it. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 01:04, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

• I'll write something right away, before I get banned because of Uncyclopedia Survivor. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 19:19, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

  Here it is: That time I fucking destroyed the world during my sojourn in Egypt. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 20:07, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

I don't have a story, so uh...

You can have this instead:

Happy? Staircase CUN^t 03:49, 5 July 2009 (UTC)

No. He's not. Wait to pick out a present you found on the way here :) Don Puttano cHeDDs 14:59,5July,2009

To celebrate your birthday, I bought myself a new monitor. Happy birthday! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:47, 5 July 2009 (UTC)

Organized Final Entries Here

• Cheddar- "Mahm00sh and the Italian"
• Zheliel- " Mahmud Shah and, well, Mhaille."
• Guildy- "Mooshy"
• Socky- "That time I fucking destroyed the world during my sojourn in Egypt"
• Steps- "Flower."
• Nameable- "2 Minutes Work"

Thanks, bitches

I'm back. Muahahahahaha Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 05:57 July 14 '09

Good. Now get to work! :D Don Puttano cHeDDs 02:19,16July,2009