Baile Átha Cliath

Baile Átha Cliath

aka The Vatican 2
map showing Baile Átha Cliath in relation to Dublin
GENERAL INFORMATION
motto	"We'll break yer legs & sell yer organs on the black market pal."
anthem	"Smell of shite off your da" by Conor McGregor
currency	Cocaine,Meth,Green,Yuan,Złoty
GEOGRAPHY
county	Co.Dublin
capital	Ikea
country	Ireland
DEMOGRAPHICS
population	27,000,000
ethnic groups	Polish, Russians, Chinese, Chinese, Brazilians, Koreans, Kenyans, Gypsies
languages / dialects	Gaylick,Chinese,Russian,Sign Language,Swahili,gayism
religions	Scientology,Communism
GOVERNMENT
government	The High Imperial Monarchy of Father Jack Hackett
emperor	Divine Lord Savior General High King Ted Crilly
HISTORY
established	1916
re-established	1916: The Pre-Sequel!
national heroes	Michael Collins, Gerry Adams,Father Dougal McGuire, Pope Bono XVII,Emperor Palpatine,Paddy Irishman,Baldie McDonagh
MAJOR EXPORTS
Racism,Drugs,Communism,Thermonuclear Warheads,Cows

Baile Átha Cliath (pronounced: Baileacthulhuacliath), colloquially known as Cliath, Baile Átha, or BÁC.It Also known as Dubhlinn (literally meaning Blackpool in english) is a suburb region right outside of Dublin City center, mainly inhabited by ethnical Celtic immigrants from the Irish speaking areas of coun-teas Mayo, Tyrone and Donegal.

Location

Baile Átha Cliath is situated just south of Dublin. It is a little unclear where exactly, since the placement of the region can variate a bit from map to map, but it is always to the south, so we can conclude that it should be mainly somewhere between Clondalkin down to coastal Dún Laoghaire.

The uncertainty of placement has to do with the native celts relative poordom. They are not always fortunate enough to own a house. Many of them live in trailers and vans and move around a bit from place to place. They may also be create lose settlements like the Brazilian favelas that are easily washed away by rain and earth slides. Another factor that increases the randomness in supposed settlement is a local abundance of Guinness combined with the ever incoming fogs from the Irish Sea.

The Celtic Suburbs

Baile and so on is one of many Celtic suburbs placed south of the greatest Irish cities. Other suburbs in this group are Leitir Cennian just south of Letterkenny, Corcaigh south of Cork and Cill Dara slightly south west of Killdare.

The inhabitants of this suburbs share - besides from their poverty- the common celtic trait of extreme cultural stubbornness. They refuse to speak English and therefore their parts of the cities cling on to those peculiar names.

Why South?

It's a bit of a mystery why these suburbs always lies to the South. One possible explanation may be that the deep Catholic celts shun the Protestants, which they have heard live in Northern Ireland. Hence in order to avoid those excommunicated religious renegades they tend to chose the more southern locations whenever they can, even if it is just about a couple of Irish miles. And soon they start lumping up in their own quarters celtienne.

See Also

• Dublin
• Cork
• Vikings

North/South Dublin Civil War

The North/South Dublin Civil War has been raging since the year of our lord 0 hundred and 0. Currently,neither side has an advantage,due to the intervention of Jesus as well as the British invasion . Occasional strategic shit-flinging has taken place,as well as ritual sacrifice of babies to appease the dark gods of Ballyfermot.Last year,a ceasefire was agreed after the devastating interdimensional Battle of Ballymun. The South won the battle, but only after Michael Collins and the Harlem Globetrotters waded into battle wielding Excalibur, strangled King Kong, and beat The Pope in lightsaber combat.

The Badlands

The Badlands is a small soviet republic situated slightly north of the Brazilian capital Tallaght. Surveying the population of The Badlands is difficult, as all attempts to communicate with the natives (known as “Methheads”) have ended in disaster, due to aggressive shitting on their part. It is believed that the force ghost of Michael Flatley rules these primitive natives, after he beat David Cameron in a competitive slapping match aboard The Death Star above Endor. Also in this remote region are Mad Max-esque bandits known as Deliveroo Drivers. These cycling horrors exclusively speak Brazilian, and are known to enjoy crashing into passers-by, delivering cold food late, and partaking in ritualistic fighting-with-inebriated-bystanders, known as “pummel the drunk”.

Mad Paddy Land