User talk:Slavemaster2

Welcome!

Hello, Slavemaster2, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
• Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

Also, I suggest you use our templates wisely. Use Template:Construction on unfinished articles by adding {{construction}} at the end of the article, or alternatively create the article in your namespace under the title User:Slavemaster2/ArticleTitle. If you want help with articles, post on Pee Review. Finally, please do not put your signature in your articles.

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date. anyway. --Lt. High Gen. Grue The Few The Proud, The Marines 22:19, 13 September 2007 (UTC)

Welcome to UnNews

On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you. Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:48, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Slavemaster2, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

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You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

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If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

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If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

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At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC) Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 20:36, 24 September 2007 (UTC)

Your Mom

No, I'm not here to make a woefully predictable joke involving what a whore she is. I'm here to ask you to please stop putting that picture on the page. You know the one. When I rewrote the page, I tactfully left out that picture, and others like it, for readability issues. Basically, that's one twisted pic, and it makes the page hard to read without wincing. It's only adding lame gross-out humor, and it paves the way for other pictures like it. (If you look at the page's history, you can see some of the old pictures on the page, mostly morbidly obese women bending over.). So please, just don't put stuff like that on the page. It's just not that funny. P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 21:27, Oct 8

ICUs

I see you placed an ICU on a page. Congratulations! This is very helpful, but please be sure to use the correct format. See Uncyclopedia:Intensive Care Unit for full details. However, your error was in placing a fix message, which is to be done as follows

{{ICU|22:28, 10 November 2007 (UTC)|fix=Your message}}

That's five tildes, which allows us to know when to kill it (if it hasn't been improved). Good luck and godspeed.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:28, 10 November 2007 (UTC)

Also, instead of a "fix=" you can try "sub=" and add stuff like "notfunny", "encyclopedic", "formatting", "random" "list", "short", etc. For example, {{ICU|~~~~~|sub=random}} gets you this:

This article needs more work. See ICU and below for details.
This page will be re-checked on 18:40, 17 November 2007 (tagged 10 November 2007)
Truth is funnier than outright Lies or Plain Nonsense:

Coherence is like a horse, and funny is like a cart.
For your article to go places, the coherence must come first.
Otherwise, you just get a cart with a horse stuck in the back.
That cart, while sometimes amusing, isn't really going anywhere.
If you need help, try asking someone for suggestions, or read this.

Hope this helps, - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 22:42, Nov 10

Sigs

Hello, I've seen that you've typed in your sig manually. Typing four tildes (~~~~) will automatically produce your name and date--Æ 00:45, 7 December 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for CVPing my country

And give me a good reason why you had put the name of my country into the CVP list? Advanced happy new year. Hope my mother doesn't abuse me. (forgot this: Ianlopez1115 13:38, 29 December 2007 (UTC))

It was already redirected there but there was no log for it. Teh Awexxome S.M. times II

UNSOC

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User goodthink U.W.P member.

Helper of needy, destroyer of ungood.

Welcome to UNSOC.

VFD

For future reference, make sure you put the VFD tag on articles you nominate for deletion. Also, you should really consider updating your sig, you can make it much more appealing without using capital letters. ~ Mordillo where is my BASTARD? 07:48, 22 January 2008 (UTC)

A Few Things...

1. I see several of your articles have been deleted. I can understand why as writing can be quite difficult if you aren't experienced for writing for Uncyc. You really should read HTBFANJS, BGBU and take a look at a wide variety of articles in UN:BEST if you want to save your current articles or create new ones.
2. You're still not using your sig properly. Instead of typing your username and sig manually, click the button in the edit box and this will automatically produce your username and time. The button will produce a basic signature as you didn't insert a fancy code into your preferences (which I'll explain in a second). Okay, here's the fancy code: Where it says "Nickname" in your preferences, insert this following code: {{SUBST:nosubst|User:Slavemaster2/sig}}

Hope this helps--Æ 01:25, 27 January 2008 (UTC)

A "Friendly" Caution

I'm watching you. Think about what you're doing.

You are being warned due to multiple poor nominations to VFD. Please read read the deletion policy and do your homework before nominating articles. Failure to do so will probably result in repeating of this behavior, which in turn will lead to sanctions or ban(s). Cheers, —RT. HON. HINOA, KNIGHT COMMANDER OF THE ORDER (BEG FOR MERCY)01:05, 6 February 2008 (UTC)

Um.. I am not vandalizing anything, so how long will I be banned for? And what about nominating pages that really are bad? Please reply on my talk page.

Kurgan

As of February 9, 2008, I am now known as Kurgan and any talk should go - here The Kurgan formerly known as Slavemaster2 8:13 PM ET 9 February 2008