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Join The CMC! Make Your Inner Cow Happy!

Moo, Codeine!

Cmc.gif
What is it about cows that gets us all hot and bothered? Where do cows come from? What are cows?

These are the questions that drive the Cow Moo Cult and its brethren, who are very, VERY interested in cows and cow by-products.

The CMC is devoted not only to cows, but to helping Uncyclopedia through general acts of goodness and through motivating people with cow-treats and the like.

So, Codeine, why not join the CMC? It's free (unless you count virginity as money) and it's fun (and it's full of clichés)! You'll get a pretty template for your userpage and a nice title for your signature! What could be better? Sign Up Now!
Double moos from your cowy friend,
Tayor

since you saw fit to archive DIRECTLY after I wrote, here it is again. The cows want you. How can you resist their call? Can you? The HRH MuCal. Tayor Lz4.jpgMUN (Praise!) (CMC!) 16:59, 29 May 2008 (UTC)

Comment about NHs and Also Humanbeings scribblewiki

I was told to create this in the village dump so I did. Did i do something wrong? Steward2007 11:57, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

The truth is out

I'm sorry, I can't hide it anymore ~Jewriken.GIF 12:00, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Yes, so, I've been declaring myself as your bot for a week now, and still no response. I'm hurt. sniff. ~Jewriken.GIF 12:56, 11 June 2008 (UTC)
There there... Good bot, have some oil. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:57, 11 June 2008 (UTC)

Thank you

For doing the thankless job of deleting the unfunniest animals from the List of Animals that Don't Exist, but should. --Hyperbole 23:22, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

And for deleting all that god-awful garbage from Indonesia. You know who you are? You're that little guy who follows the parade with a push broom. --Hyperbole 18:49, 18 June 2008 (UTC)

Hey

Hey. — Sir Manticore progress-wheel.gif 10:19, 5 June 2008 (UTC)

Soliciting

No, this is not whoring. I'm just after pics for this. Don't worry, they will be used for nothing untoward. Honest. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 12:23, Jun 10

Nice. Thanks! --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 12:44, Jun 10
That is is suspiciously very close to the real Codeine! ~Jewriken.GIF 13:07, 10 June 2008 (UTC)
You don't wanna know how scarily accurate that one of me is. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 13:11, Jun 10
I'm not saying anything about mine...~Jewriken.GIF 13:13, 10 June 2008 (UTC)
Speaking of whoring. I could do with some ideas to expand my latest effort. Also, I wish to speak with you. About a piece of music. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Funnily enough, I actually made a pink and purple version of the London Gherkin... it's at home somewhere, I'll dig it out for you when I get back later. And uh, yeah. Badger, Bush, Mushroom, I know. I've been crap, really crap. Mail me the swf and a link to the original again and I'll see what I can do. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 14:41, 11 June 2008 (UTC)

About the ICU tag you put on the article I created

I notice that you tagged the recent article that I created, Gnarnia, with a "Truth is funnier than outright Lies or Plain Nonsense" slogan. I was wondering why you did that since I thought that my article was mostly truth.-Wi Account ki19:43, 10 June 2008 (UTC)~

Yay

I was working on yay i hadn't finishd it yet. So surrender or suffer the consequences. I know when you found it, it was a bit.... Not very ..... you know. But i was going to get rid of some of the junk (honest). I have great buzzing ideas in my head like a load of angry bees arrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!!!!! I did put a very clear sign that it wasn't finished yet but you got rid of it any way. I had only started it yesterday at 10:00 and i wasn't drunk!!!! i didn't have anything alcoholic only some lemonade and a glass of water.--Humpldumple 15:39, 11 June 2008 (UTC)

Uh, I think you meant to leave this on Mhaille's talk page. I never touched it guv, honest! Anyway, the {{construction}} tag on it should keep it safe until you finish. :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 23:00, 11 June 2008 (UTC)

Bout that guy that you just banned

Hey, that guy you just baned was the creator of that page. He just didn't know what to o the get it deleted, he shouldn't have been baned. Lieutenant THEDUDEMAN Dude ... Totally UOTM KUN GotA F@H 16:59, 12 June 2008 (UTC)

Just noticed that now myself! Unblocked, thanks.-- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 17:01, 12 June 2008 (UTC)

Your reply

Hi, i want to start on a fresh note, its best you email me, as explained, i love your name codeine, how did you choose it? Codeine is 6x less powerful than morphine.

So what freedoms do I get here, all swear words allowed, my talk space is my holy ground, nobody to f with?
your site is hosted by jewbo and wikia.com but do they have any power and say over it or our edits they may not like, why did they decide to, who had it b4?

Edsuxcux 21:13, 21 June 2008 (UTC)

Just read the links contained in Help:Contents. I'm not here to hold your hand or be your personal nursemaid, almost everyone else on this site has managed to figure out how it works without having to be given step by step instructions. If you need that extra bit of help, sign up for the Adopt-A-Noob programme and one of our designated adopters will take care of you. Hope this helps. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 11:32, 22 June 2008 (UTC)
No, I am only requesting you get in touch, how did you get this name? How can noob program help? I hope at least I can write what i want on my userspace, otherwise no freedom!

Edsuxcux 00:31, 25 June 2008 (UTC)

You can say just about anything in your talk page, however I'd say if you are just here to attack another website I'd have a rethink if I were you. Clever satire is one thing, pointless attacks that are just likely to add more flames to the fire are unwanted and won't be permitted. Instead of focusing other sites why don't you try writing an article on another topic. There's lots to choose from. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Oh esteemed admin

I've been approached by this guy on IRC. He seemed completely unphazed by the fact that he was infinitely blocked, but more interested in the fact that his article on Adam carolla was deleted. Now I've looked at things and the article was obviously no good, and he did make the big mistake of vandalizing your userpage. He has however asked me to find out why his article was deleted, and when I told him why, he told me that he was willing to touch it up to meet our quality standards, and has even conceded to reading some articles from the Best Of, and reading our standard beginner links and what not. He would like to apologize sincerely for blanking your page, and knows perfectly well that what he did was wrong, and it seems that at first he simply didn't understand how we take care of things around here. I've informed him a bit and it seems he's a civil, willing-to-reform guy. Now, I don't really expect his article to be any good, or ever finished to meet our standards, but I'd like to request that his ban be shortened, and Adam carolla be hacked up in his userspace, if it's not too much trouble, as he's shown a willingness to cooperate, and doesn't seem in the least bit malicious. I'll be watching him for a while if he does in fact get back to editing, and we'll see how it goes from there. I leave the decision to you now. -RAHB 09:17, 25 June 2008 (UTC)

Since I'm currently the Jew on call, I'll unblock him. However, I don't see any reason to recreate that article - since it seems to be complete vanity. Tell him to contact me on my talk page if he wants do discuss it further. I can't access IRC at the moment. Also, please let him know that I won't tolerate any more blanking or recreations of previous deleted articles. Thanks. ~Jewriken.GIF 09:20, 25 June 2008 (UTC)

Good day Sir

I just wondered... While your finger is over the grant rollback button, I wondered if you would consider also offering this useful tool to Heerenveen? As I'm sure you are aware, HV is one of our best recent changes addicts and I know he has experienced problems with the .js script in the past. I'm asking on his behalf as I know he would like said tool, but he is too dam polite to ask for himself. If you think it's a good idea, I will canvas the support of a few other admins and let you know the result. Cheers. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 18:58, Jun 26

repeating post regarding anal sex originally posted on UU's page ~Jewriken.GIF 20:44, 26 June 2008 (UTC)

Ah, this would seem to be an appropriate place to post this then. I've garnered powerful Jewish backing, the inflatable vote and Australian scientific support to further the illusion of democracy, so unless you've had a Mr Burns-esque sudden and dramatic change of heart overnight, could you do the honours when you have a spare moment or two? Much obliged, guv... --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 08:49, Jun 27

I heArs u Iz givin out free rollbak

Rumor has it thatyou're giving out rollback. I'd ask like everyone else on irc, but i'm away from my computer. I was one of the first to ask on the forum and I was wondering if you would be kind enough to grant these magic powers to me as well. Lieutenant THEDUDEMAN Dude ... Totally UOTM KUN GotA F@H 13:48, 2 July 2008 (UTC)

Wide open butthole

It's not funny even if I am trying to make it seem like a serious medical issue? the article was spawned from a comment my GF made about current internet porn... how about if we do without the picture? – Preceding unsigned comment added by ShuaDaddy (talk • contribs)

That sounds like a fair compromise. Spare me the disturbing pictures and you're fine. Cheers. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue)
I have decided the article without the picture is no longer as offensive as I was hoping for :( I took the offending (yuk,yuk) photo off but now the article is huff-worthy (perhaps it always was???)... do your bidding, I shall complain no longer (user:ShuaDaddy goes to think of something funnier for next time))
Well, why not try using some kind of innuendo instead? A quick Google for "Tunnel entrance" throws these up: [1] [2]. To me, that kind of comparison between a wide open anus and a road tunnel is funnier than a porn shot. Just a suggestion :). -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:03, 14 July 2008 (UTC)

Mah Boi

I hear that this rollback is what all true warriors strive for? I just wonder what you admins are up to. Your majesty, Uncyclopedia has been taken over by silly IP edits. How can we help? It is written, that Enzo Aquarius should get rollback.

I was wondering if I could have rollback please? :) - Rougethebat.gifAdmiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate SonicLivesPicture.png 20:28, 14 July 2008 (UTC)

Morning

Now I'm confused. More so than normal actually... That General Veers‎ thing. You banned the IP for blanking, and then reverted my revert back to pretty much what he did. Either twas blanking from the IP in which case my revert was correct, or um... Perhaps that IP should not have been banned? I'm not sure. Anyway. It's dinner time, so I'm off to the pub. Have fun. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 10:53, Jul 15

A spot of confusion. The IP was in the right, someone had copypasted the article content four times and he was fixing it. I thought he was blanking at first, but then I looked over the diffs. It should be all sorted now, and he's unbanned. Enjoy your pint and pie :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 11:21, 15 July 2008 (UTC)

Bold text

Ahem

Codeine, are you aware that in my article Blankism, there was actual text, not just plain old blank? ~ Mgr.ReadMeSoon!? 23:49, 12 August 2008 (UTC)

I restored that one for you, but Codeine is right - it has been done several times in the past. ~Jewriken.GIF 23:51, 19 July 2008 (UTC)
I should have guessed. Whatever. Thanks for restoring it though, Mordillo. ~ Mgr.ReadMeSoon!? 23:49, 12 August 2008 (UTC)

DeafLeppard

There's a Mister DeafLeppard hoping to be unbanned in IRCland.....I'll leave it in your capable hands. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

UnNews Article Material?

Check this out... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

This is not news to me. :) Besides, what do you expect if the surveyed group includes John Portsmouth Football Club Westwood? The man has "PFC" tattooed on his face for Christ's sake. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 19:39, 1 August 2008 (UTC)

Sorry...

I am sorry for creating so much chaos, I was merely baiting. I am really sorry.Hetelllies 02:53, 15 August 2008 (UTC)

Lol don't worry, Firithfenion is really not hard to bait at all.Arguecat3 02:55, 15 August 2008 (UTC)
It's fine; just don't bring drama to our wiki please, that's all. :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 10:28, 15 August 2008 (UTC)

Nice

And all was quiet, and the vandals and twats did play. And thence came Codeine, in a fury of bans and deletions, and lo, shit was taken care of. Nice to see a professional at work ;-) --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 11:24, Sep 4

Heh, thanks man. Can't leave the town without a sherrif now, can we? :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 11:30, 4 September 2008 (UTC)

Thanks

Newcookie.gif Sycamore has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

For fixing my welcome and sorting some vandals out:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 11:01, 17 September 2008 (UTC)

Just dropping in time to time :) --chron

Oh lord! It's the LORD! Someone ask for his signature! ~Jewriken.GIF 07:28, 24 September 2008 (UTC)

Template:countryname

Please protect the new Template:countryname as the page used it, the Template:languages. Thank You!--Hant (Talk) - For your safety, China Free! - 11:51, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

Done. Free Tibet! :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:15, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

Hey,

Could you please block me for 2 days? Rory666 20:05, 15 October 2008 (UTC)

Why? -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 11:42, 16 October 2008 (UTC)

Pronunciation

As you pronounce my username, first form your mouth into an "N" shape. Click your tongue against your teeth and esophagous as the air flows. Form an "O" and gurgle lightly. Finally, pronounce the "K" in my name like the "K" in the number "5,000" (5K). Thank you for the ban. I didn't realize how simply awful I've been.   Le Cejak <13:24 Oct 23, 2008>

query

could you at least semi-protect NASA while it's on the front page? it's bound to draw a high amount of dickery. thanks! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:28, 23 October 2008 (UTC)

Question

Are you having some technical difficulties? I can't roll back or huff or protect? ~Jewriken.GIF 10:07, 24 October 2008 (UTC)

Temporary database lock. Someone invited 4chan to come and trash the site, so there's some edit restriction going on at the moment.. shouldn't affect you though, that's odd. If you can get on IRC at all, that would be handy. Try Mibbit maybe? -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue)
Can't, the security guys will be all over me, even though I'm one of them :) If sannse is there, can you ask her to check it? ~Jewriken.GIF 10:15, 24 October 2008 (UTC)
What are you seeing Mordillo? Any error messages? -- sannse (talk) 10:17, 24 October 2008 (UTC)
When I try to protect or rollback I get the "session hijack" message. And when I try to delete, it's just popping up the deletion screen again without doing the actual delete. Only thing that seems to work is the ban hammer. Figures :) ~Jewriken.GIF 10:19, 24 October 2008 (UTC)