User talk:Cheese midge

Welcome!

Hello, Cheese midge, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:

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• How to be funny and not just stupid

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If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. Again, welcome!  -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 23:26, 27 February 2009 (UTC)

A for Affort

Ok, as you requested, I looked at the pages you created. Here's what I can truthfully say: You can tell that lots of wuv went into them. Here's what I can't truthfully say: they'll still be around in 30 days.

You see, the thing about Uncyclopedia is that the articles, ideally, are funny. Not in the Pineapple Express "wow, that guy was smoking something funny" way. They're supposed to be funny because people can figure out what the article is about, and how it uplifts their life or some such wonderful thing.

But -- and this is a 'but' the size of Rush Limbaugh's but -- the article didn't get insta-huffed. Why? Because of the wuv. The other admins, the ones who actually log on more than once a year, must have seen the promise in your articles. Maybe they see the Catman as a possible new meme. Most importantly, though, your articles aren't 100% vanity -- they're about 49%, and that was enough to give them a stay of execution.

I don't think it'll last, though. So here's what I would do in your sex position:

• Copy the articles to your user space, like maybe User:Cheese midge/Catman of greenock and User:Cheese midge/Weirdest words. That will preserve them for future scholars to write dissertations about the decline of the American empire in the third millennium.
• Keep hanging around adding a new viewpoint to existing articles. I think you've got something to give, and Uncyclopedia will take it like a third-grade bully behind the cafeteria.
• Floss. Don't wait until your dental hygenist calls the dentist over to discuss your "malodor". Don't ask me how I know, I just know.

I miss this place. Thanks for giving me an excuse to pontificate again. -- Sir BobBobBob ! S ? [rox!|sux!] 18:11, 7 March 2009 (UTC)