User:J!MMY
“Not a true master of the Smash Brawl universe... Or any video game universe for that matter.”
“My son, he really is a prick...”
“PYROOO!!!!”
“cabron... >_<”
“He cleans a car like he wipes his ass...”
“He's a nice boy. Yet he seems to be plotting against me.”
“HI MOM!!! ”
“He's not the antichrist, he's an anti-GOD!!!”
“Madre de Dios!!”
“Damn you're sexy...”
J!mmy is in fact not his real name. His real name which is harder to pronounce than anything known to man, appart from his uncle's name, Cthulhu. By the age of 2, everyone decided it was easier to give him a human name, and spare eachother the brain aneurisms. They decided to call him Adrian Thorn,NOT Damian, as portrayed in that falsely misguided popculture flick, The Omen. Once again, the media fucked it up, so he decided that J!mmy would be easier. Now he resides in the middle of nowhere, where he tries to blend in with everyone, while he searches for the answer to that everlasting question: Why does God not play with us anymore?
Why should people love J!mmy?[edit | edit source]
J!mmy never hurt anyone, except everyone else, so why not love him. Here are some simple facts to persuade you:
- Surgeon General's warn you to stay away from tobacco, J!mmy is not tobacco.
- J!mmy is everyone's favorite flavor: Artificial.
- Kewkky says so...I mean, they do hang out, and Kewkky hasn't died.
- His girlfriend Vanessa hasn't died...yet.
- He loves little furry animals...Oh yes he does.
- self explanatory: Cunnilingus
- Condom World carries dildos with his name and likeness.
Life story made short[edit | edit source]
Dada puts penis in Mama's vajojo and out spits a baby.
Kewkky's Analisis on J!mmy's role on Earth[edit | edit source]
Kewkky passed out before he could actually finish this...
Diet a la J!mmy[edit | edit source]
- Pop-Tarts
- Cheddar Ruffles with Squeeze Cheeze
- Coke...and we mean the soda
- Meat
- Cookies...not Kewkky, contrary to popular belief.
J!mmy's Belief System[edit | edit source]
J!mmy has created his own set of belief's so that the world would not fall into perdition. Here following are a few of the dogmas of J!mmy's religion:
- God is an imaginary friend created so that people can blame Him for the bad things in the world.
- Sins are forgiven if done without really wanting to do them.
- Life is a vicious circle, so you should buy a skateboard.
- Kewkky and God are not the same person, although they have similar functions on Earth.
The 10 Commandments by J!mmy (revised by Kewkky)[edit | edit source]
- Love God before others.
- You are your own God.
- Masturbate daily, saves you from prostate cancer.
- Every time you masturbate God kills and Emo kid
- Therefore you are helping exterminate a plague...GOOD JOB!!!
- Kewkky gets dibbs on the KFC.
- J!mmy used to get dibbs on every ass that walks into a room...Unless she was fat or ugly, then again, Vanessa decided this rule was useless, so now every
ass that walks into the room goes to Medusa
- Um....I don't recall writing an eigth commandment.
- Sex is good for you.
- Do not kill, unless it is a fuzzy bunny about to kill you.
- Always get your numbers wrong..Or else Kewkky will disown your ass.
STILL WORKING ON THIS