Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Tragedy Strikes Texas

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UnNews:Tragedy Strikes Texas

Review. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 21:20, 22 December 2007 (UTC)

Wild FAG appeared! FAG used REVIEW! ~Fag x FS

I don't think Fag's here right now, so...

UnNews:Tragedy Strikes Texas is being reviewed by CajekHi! Your Source for Fine Scented Pee And Whatever Else Comes Out Of Him

Humour:	6.5	avg of each "part" intro (1st P) [6] I found it very strange that it would address me in the first person. I think it should be more in normal unnews style with third person. Sometimes first person works, but it just felt weird here. Other than that, I suppose I get what you're talking about. beginning (2nd to 3rd Ps) [6] Well that was kinda random. That first person thing is still kinda creepy. You got me to giggle at the hell raisers club, but not enough to figure out what exactly is going on, TKF. Somebody poisoned the well, obviously, but it's kinda random. Neuro-whatnow? middle (4th to 7th Ps) [9] Yes! They forgot the Alamo! ...that's pretty clever. end (4th to 7th Ps) [5] Weak ending. In fact, it just trails off! UnNews isn't supposed to do that! Also, why are you introducing a new character to us? I have no idea who Stephen is.
Concept:	6	I think it's too bad that you got to the Alamo so late in the story! You should go on and on and on about what a tragedy it is, and who it hit, and what other people think! What is the new rendition of the alamo? You need to dive way more into the alamo story. You maybe should even get it out of the way in the introduction. In fact, yes, squish all of the first 5 paragraphs into the size of the first one, and then go on and on about how they forgot the alamo. Please, please make this article about how they forgot the alamo!!! You get the random panda for all that weird stuff (that made no sense) in the intro, beginning and end!
Prose and formatting:	8	above average formatting.
Images:	9	Pretty good, there. Nice caption. I have no picture to give you in this section.
Miscellaneous:	7.4	{{Pee|6.5|6|8|9}}
Final Score:	36.9	Yes, make it about the alamo. That's as cut and dry a piece of advice I can give you. I hope I helped, Froggy!!
Reviewer:	Le Cejak • <-> (Dec 28) 16:24

Sorry, the reason I kept it quite vague was because it's the first part in a trilogy of UnNewses on the topic. I deleted a few indicatedly weak parts, though. /me is sad Cajek didn't get the Pee Wee's Big Adventure bit -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 00:28, 30 December 2007 (UTC)