Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Nazi Zombies (Mk. IV)
Nazi Zombies [edit source]
Tis' the time I re-submit an article to be reviewed. I'm out of ideas again, so please go in-depth... Gamma287 
☭Tetяis? 16:53, November 12, 2011 (UTC)
- I don't know that another review is going to really be much help here. 4 reviews on one article seems a little excessive. Maybe better going back to those that did earlier reviews and get feedback from them. Personally, I don't really like the article, but the topic is well outside of my sphere of knowledge, so there's potentially in-jokes that I'm missing. As it is, it's a decent article, but I wouldn't say it is feature material, and I can't see anything obvious that would make it so. (Probably a completely unhelpful comment, but it is just my opinion. Frosty definitely disagrees with me on that one.) Pup 01:27 13 Jan '12
- I asked if a review was still required and had no response. I want this out of the queue though, so here goes. Pup 01:18 26 Jan '12
| Humour: | 3 | I found this unfunny.
I have no real knowledge of the game that it's about. That means that while there are some in-jokes that I woukdn't get from reading through this, it also means that I come to this with no real preconceived notions. So consider me reading this from the perspective of the majority of the population. So I read through this and didn't laugh. I wondered if I'd missed something, so I read through it again and didn't laugh. There were a couple of meh jokes in there, but nothing really funny. So I went and read up on the game itself. I looked at this and that and that gave me some more understanding - sort of. The original storyline behind this is so horribly convoluted and twisted that it makes no real sense to somebody who hasn't played the game and followed every boring bit of minutiae about the characters. I still barely understand what the storyline was. And that's what really struck me - this is a confused, jumbled, illogical, non-sequential, and predominantly stupid story. If you have a story like this that you're going to parody, then that is what you should be parodying. As it is you've given an accurate retelling of what is a stupid story, and thrown a few weak one-liners in there. As this article stands, the main vein of humour here has been completely untapped. What has also made this even more frustrating is in te telling of the story you've told it as though your audience already knows what's going on. As I said, assuming you have an audience made up solely of people who have played this game, then that might work, but you've made a confusing story even more confusing and idiotic, but not funny. Then thee's the gameplay. Again, going through a bu file of things from the game and throwing in the occasional one-liner. Nothing of value in it. |
| Concept: | 3 | What I said about humour. There is no comedic concept. It's a semi-accurate article relating to a game. Nothing funny in the concept at all - no odd angles, no parody of story. |
| Prose and formatting: | 5 | Spelling and grammar issues are there, but mainly things like uncapitalised sentences and proper nouns, that kind of thing. |
| Images: | 4 | images are suitable for the topic. Beyond that they are unfunny, and the captions are extremely weak jokes. |
| Miscellaneous: | 4 | You've worked really hard on this article, and you asked for a review that would hopefully get you closer to a feature. The short answer is that I would vote against this as a feature without a doubt, and it barely scrapes above VFD status as it doesn't have obvious issues (re poor formatting, listcruft, etc.)
The best option here is to start again from a clean slate and work out your concept first. If you are trying to make people who have no idea what you're talking about laugh they have to be able to understand, so you will have to spell it out. |
| Final Score: | 19 | I'm sorry for the harsh review. As always, a review is an opinion, and my opinion may be in the minority, but I'm also not going to say "It's fine" when I truly feel that it's sub-par. |
| Reviewer: | Pup 01:18 26 Jan '12 | |